30th October: Home early

Arrived before 9am for Simon's swimming session, only to find him outside very dejected. It had been cancelled. I went in to investigate. There had been a burst water main and most of the hospital was without water. Disastrous, they couldn't even flush the loos. Margaret joined me and we took Simon for a cuppa and tried to cheer him up. This was hard, he had been so looking forward to his swim today.
I went off to work but couldn't keep my mind on anything and it was very hot today. So I went home thinking I'll have a dip in the pool, cool off and try again. I rang the Rehab, still no water and they were considering evacuating. I decided that was enough and said I would like to take him home, they agreed, and here we are. I didn't get my dip in the pool, but maybe tomorrow when Simon isn't looking.

I managed to 'shower' Simon in a chair in the garden using a watering can of warm water ( I have to stand on a foot stool to get the height). Anyone looking over the fence would have thought this very bizarre but it was the only way I could think of. Well it worked, he is fresh and clean which he wasn't when I picked him up. I pity anyone staying on Rehab this weekend, nobody has showered or washed all day. We had a nice meal sitting on the patio. Now Simon is resting in his favourite chair with the TV and his beloved cat. So far we have managed several 'transfers' from the wheelchair without difficulty. Fingers crossed. This weekend we plan nothing more adventurous than eating on the patio and lolling around the house. Life is just as it should be.

Love Marian x

29th October: Who burnt the toast?

Started my marking at 6am while it was cool and quiet, managed to get finished by 11am, in time to visit Simon for lunchtime. He was narked about something to do with the morning toast - perhaps it was burnt. Small things like that can really put your day out - I can remember being in hospital once and the orderly declaring that there was no time to make toast and we would all have to go without. We were outraged, protests were organised and one patient raised a petition to be sent to the Secretary of State. It was all over by tea-time.

Simon's diabetes nurse came to give me training on how to use the blood glucose meter and the insulin pen - I've been using these things daily for about two years, but didn't like to interrupt so listened patiently. Simon was grinning.

I think that we have approval for overnight leave this weekend. Whoopee! It will be over 30 degrees and very hot on Sunday - hope that our air conditioner still works after the winter break. We have had some beautiful days this week high 20s / low 30s just perfect (except for having to work).

Simon gets his first dip in the hydrotherapy pool tomorrow morning. I plan to get there early to witness this - it will be great to see him in the water again.

Just when I thought the marking was finished, some more came along. Interesting stuff though, two honours theses on lively topics.

All seems to be proceeding well with the house, the Oz system seems to be fairly straightforward so long as you pay people to do all the leg work, it is mostly a matter of signing lots of documents. Shirley had a more difficult experience in Tunisia where they use an archaic French system. They can actually hold up a transaction for failure to pay 1 Dinar (50 pence?) for the rubbish collection.

Some of you have had phone calls from Simon but couldn't work out who it was. If you get an odd call, it might just be Simon. I know that he phoned Aiden, we had a text from him sounding confused.

Love Marian x

28th October: 22 Steps

Good sleep, then out early to catch Simon's physio session. Watched him transferring independently from the bed to chair etc. He is really strong now and manages without assistance. It is likely that we will get permission for overnight leave this weekend. The second part of the physio session was in the gym where I watched Simon take 22 steps in two series. He only needs a brace on the lower leg to keep the ankle straight. Simon is managing to do this even though he has no feeling in the lower leg.
I left him to his own devices at lunchtime while they had a ward BBQ. Simon managed to get second helpings again. Home to bash out some marking - nearly finished, then had a cool dip in the pool.
Found Simon waiting for me at the door this evening, I brought take-away and he was starving after all the physio sessions. Great news, he is to be allowed to use the hydrotherapy pool this Friday, and if all goes well, he gets to swim twice a week from then on. He will be so happy, he loves the water. I will try to get to the swimming session on Friday morning, I want to see how they get him in and out of the pool.

Thanks for cards from Miranda, and Margaret & Gerry. I think Simon has also taken some phone calls, he loves to talk.
All good,

Love Marian x

27th October: ZZZZZ

So very tired, I must just sleep. Night night.

M x

26th October: Technical problems

Sorry for the lack of blog these last few days, I have had some technical problems (thanks to Microsoft). I defragmented the disk overnight (always a worrying process) and seem to have made a bit more space, but no question I have to find a better computer. I will try to find one that is friendly for Simon, big screen and joystick. Perhaps even touch screen if such exists. I really need advice on this, get busy posting comments guys.

So what has happened. Simon came home for Saturday and Sunday afternoon, we now stay out until 7pm. We are going to be trained on transfers (to beds, chairs, loos, cars etc) on Wednesday by the physios. There is a plan to let us have an overnighter at home next weekend if all goes well in the practice sessions. This would be such a bonus for us. I also realise that it is a test for me (set by the rehab staff). Can Marian cope on her own? I think I can. Have discovered that there are some things that I do need: more ramps, a baby intercom thing (so that I don't have to grow eyes in the back of my head), a tazer gun for very bad taxi drivers, and a 27 hour day. Some of those can be fixed.

I received automated confirmation from the HR database that I had successfully passed my two year probation period and that I am confirmed as a permanent member of staff until December 2049 - I will be getting close to my 90th birthday by then! I have heard of the ageing workforce but that is ridiculous. It made me smile.

Marking heavily at the moment. I try to be forgiving, and remember what it was like to be a first year student. There are some that just cannot be rescued, but in most cases I have been able to wave the magic pass wand. More star-chamber stuff. Early indications are that our reflective journal exercise has been successful - thank you, God.

Simon continues to work hard in the gym, and is making progress with his leg. The arm is not making progress, and he asked me (not for the first time) if he could have it amputated. NO. A totally irreversible and dangerous procedure. I don't blame Simon for asking and I know what the scriptures say about this. However, the fact that he has pain in his hand is encouraging. Hard as it is to bear, where there is pain there is life.

I know that colleagues at UniSa are preoccupied with their own problems just now, but I would ask you to stay in contact with Simon. You can telephone him at the Repat 8275 1920, Bed 8, and you can certainly pass by and see us at our home in South Brighton at weekends. We are in the phone book. He has been worrying about the lack of contact with you all. Please stand by him guys, I know he would do it for you. I predict that he will be back at work in some way in two years time.

Fair result for the Hammers against a top Arsenal side, if only the defence wasn't so flimsy. Personally I think the goalkeeper needs to gain weight - wider is better in goal, surely.
Hope this post makes it.

Marian x

22nd October: Shopping trip

Into work early and split up some marking with Raj, commented on some papers, then left my office in a dreadful mess. Decided just to shut the door on it and go back tomorrow with a shovel and a large wheelie bin. Time for a real clear out. Set off to rehab for Simon's lunch. He had been in the gym, and they are reporting very distinct movement in his right thigh, so now it has recovered below the hip. As luck would have it a team of physio students have just arrived on placement at the hospital and are really keen, so Simon is getting extra physio sessions most days. I had arranged to take Simon to Marion Shopping Centre to see the optometrist leaving at 4.30pm. Decided that there was no reason to go back to work, just found a quiet shady garden and got on with my marking for the afternoon. This was remarkably productive, nothing but birdsong and the odd spider to interrupt my thoughts. In fact, I got so much done that I am thinking of setting up a temporary office in the Repat grounds. If anyone is looking for me, I am to be found under the furthest tree on the left behind Rheumatology.
Went back to collect Simon from his ward for the taxi to Marion. The scoundrels let us down badly, almost half an hour late, then the driver started to mess about adding several kilometres to the route. I was quite annoyed with him. Got Simon to the optometrist just on time, this was a good experience. The doctor remembered Simon from his last visit but took the new situation completely in his stride "See you've got some wheels there Simon!". We explained what had happened and he gave us a very detailed explanation of what has been happening to Simon's eyesight. The good news is that he said very positive things about the eyesight returning to near normal after around six months, and that Simon was showing signs of improvement already. He didn't even recommend changing the prescription on the glasses. Simon was really pleased with this news.
From there we hit the shopping centre food court - these are always good value in Australia. He selected a Yiros stall, and we had quite a healthy meal - plenty of salad.
With just a little time left we had a tour around Myers TV and Hi-Fi section where Simon drooled over the wide-screen plasmas. We already have two of these, but that will never be enough.... I have promised him Foxtel when we move to the new house, so I suppose a very good home-movie system wouldn't be a bad idea. Listen to me, falling for this already. From there to JB Hi-Fi where we found a bunch of DVDs that Simon wanted including the first series of the Wire, we have the rest, so now he can begin watching that. His pick for this evening was a series of Stargate Atlantis.
We had intended to do more shopping - smaller clothes needed as he is shrinking quite rapidly. So another shopping trip on the cards next Thursday.
Good taxi ride back to the hospital, and left Simon getting into bed tired but happy with his day. Rushed home to let Skippy out - think he had been crossing his legs for a couple of hours.
We had quite a long chat with the Professor (Simon's consultant) this afternoon. She is a real card and I like her a lot. Simon was negotiating his release date - he is prepared to compromise on six weeks when Asher gets here. She said maybe, but definitely by xmas. Also she was going to try to get Simon some access to the hydrotherapy pool. We asked whether we could use our private insurance in some way. The answer is again, maybe. However, she was very interested that we had private insurance, and with the best company, because it will ensure continued rehab treatment for Simon in the future. While outpatient appointments are limited and not covered by insurance, she can arrange to admit Simon to the hospital for a week at a time for intensive rehab. With this prospect she thought it possible that we could release Simon earlier rather than later. The problem with early release is that it effectively ends the intensive rehab period and, under the public system, it is difficult to restart it unless you have a major incident. This was all very interesting advice. I had wondered why we were paying for all this health insurance, now it seems to have been worth it. I did worry about the prospect of having to admit Simon to the hospital for a week at a time, but it seems it isn't really like that, he can come home at night and that will be easy for me because I work just ten minutes away and can drop and pick him up on my way.
Next Wednesday we have an appointment with the physios to show me how to transfer Simon to and from chairs, beds etc. The truth is, Simon and I have already achieved these things - I admit, awkwardly. It will be good to know the correct way so that we take less risks. Today I found a wheelie shower chair, whoopee cushion, and a 'grabber stick' under my carport - all delivered courtesy of the SA government. I am impressed and grateful.
In all, a busy and interesting day. Thanks for the advice about dogs and cats. It is obvious that dogs are more of a threat to cats than cats are to dogs, but cats are a bit cleverer and have a better sense of self preservation. Then dogs are more loyal and friendly than cats. Oh dear, too difficult. Think I'll get Asher to talk this one over with Simon - he knows about the practicalities of dog management (HND Furry Things, BSc (Animal Behaviour and Dog Mngt), Phd: The application of Pavlovian theory of slaverring dogs to cat behaviour in rural Australia (Fleurieu Peninsula).
Love Marian x
PS can't get photos to work here any more, it tries to blow up my machine at every attempt. Blasted Microsoft downloads are the cause of it....

21st October: Last lecture for 2009

Gave my last class for 2009 today. The semester has flown by, now we just have the marking to deal with and some course development work. We are also interviewing for new staff, so enough to keep me off the streets. The research students carry on as usual, although I might give a couple of my chaps an enforced break over xmas, they have been working way too many hours.
Simon had a good day, worked very hard in his therapy sessions and tackled some difficult things. Pizza for tea as a small reward. We talked a lot about work stuff, then had a deal or no deal session. Simon has been wearing shorts as the weather is improving and has sun-burned knees. If you turned the lights out you could see him coming, his knees are so shiny. He is missing George, his old room-mate, and Ron, another chap who always spoke to Simon and gave him a lot of encouragement. Ron has gone home, while George has gone to a hospital nearer his home. I will try to take Simon out of the hospital more now that I have finished teaching. I plan to get him to the optometrist soon, and may be able to combine that after work with a shopping trip and a meal out.
I have also been looking for wheelchair friendly holiday destinations - not a great deal out there sad to say, but I will persevere. It would be nice to get away for a few days.
Our garden has been taken over by birds, there must have been 60 of them this morning, all competing for space on Simon's bird-feeder. The pigeons assemble beneath this and pick up all the crumbs that the smaller birds drop. Skippy is in heaven - although he cannot pounce like he used to, he is enjoying the chase. I can see him licking his lips as I write this.
Today, Simon asked me if we could buy a dog! I suggested that we should wait until Skippy retires, any more change in his delicate life could leave him very traumatised. We already have the prospect of another house-move to get over, he will have to get used to a completely new environment, and the territory is even bigger than before. Come to think of it, perhaps Skippy does need an assistant. If you know of any cat-friendly dogs please tell.

Hope this post makes it, my computer is getting cranky.

Love Marian x

20th October: Raising the game

19th October: Al-Fresco dining

We had such a beaut day here in South Australia, I think around 26 degrees, clear blue skies and a slight breeze. It was a pity to have to work on such a day. Met up with Simon and Margaret at the hospital at lunchtime, we both went armed with extra grub so had to take some away. A nice chat, and some laughs. Margaret has managed to get a last minute mini-break to Queensland which sounds idyllic. By chance, some of Margaret's long lost friends will be in Queensland and staying nearby at the same time, they havent seen each other since the 1980s - a lot to catch up on.
Back to work to catch up with a student and guide him on an assignment. I will be marking much of this week and next. Hoping to find some juicy Higher Distinctions amongst them. One of our science students was made a Rhodes scholar this week, he has achieved Higher Distinctions in every topic that he has taken as an undergraduate averaging over 85% - phenomenal. Look out for a Dr Josh Makepeace in the future, he is very special. I hope that he will eventually return to Flinders after his spell at Oxford.
Back to rehab where I returned with the extra grub from lunchtime - a quiche which we shared in the garden. It was such a beautiful evening, Simon and I sat in the warmth and enjoyed some fine conversation and a lovely cuddle.
Sorry to have missed the blog yesterday, had something on my mind, but Simon helped me clear it out this evening. All good. I say good luck to the Potters who thrashed the Hammers on Saturday. These days they look like a decent team and they deserved that win. As for the Hammers, the inability to kick the ball seems to be a bit of a hindrance in their game...
Love Marian x

17th October: A century of posts

Just realised that this is my one hundreth post on this blog. In politics they always count the first one hundred days and then report on what the president/prime minister has actually achieved. The honeymoon period is over, as they say. Our honeymoon is only just beginning. I love Simon more deeply now than I ever did, and treasure all the time we have together. And our first 100 days have been remarkable.
We spent the afternoon happily at home with a Steve Coogan DVD (the one about the pest controller), it was hilarious. Well done, BBC. By the way, I am still waiting for my Corrie Street episodes that were promised! Simon managed to get in and out of his armchair again without any great difficulty. I am beginning to regret buying it in leather because he does slide downwards in the chair. The fabric version might have been better.
Dug up some spuds from the veggie patch and had those for tea. I am worrying that we will not be able to eat all of the potatoes that we have grown (approximately 90 kilos; twice my weight!). Maybe I can swap some for lemons with my neighbours.
Think there are a bunch of Whitaker birthdays imminent or recent. Happy birthdays guys, go wild!
Love Marian x

16th October: Lining up for the flu jab

Spent a while lining up for the swine flu vaccine this morning. This is now freely available to everyone in Australia. It reminded me of school days where we all had to move in single file through the nurses station with our sleeves rolled up. Jab, "ouch!" "Next!". The kids in front used to filter messages back down the line about the length of the needle - by the time the message reached me the needle was reported to be four foot long! Thankfully, the swine flu jab was painless. I met a young man in the waiting room who has an acquired brain injury, he overheard me talking to my colleague about Simon and said "I used to be like that". Two years on from a car accident he is on his feet, talking, and back at Uni studying science. I have arranged to meet up with him for a coffee next week, I love to hear these success stories.
Because of the flu line, I was a bit late for my meeting with a research student. He was very understanding, and seems to be making good progress despite juggling very many responsibilities. Off to rehab to meet Simon for lunch - he was nowhere to be found. I looked everywhere and began to worry that he had absconded. He has a small amount of money and I wondered if he had managed to blag his way onto a bus. After about fifteen minutes he came rolling along the corridor, he had been in an unscheduled occupational therapy session. Phew!
Simon had exciting news. He has been fitted with a plastic back-slab for his right leg. This keeps the leg straight and supports his ankle when he is standing. With this he was able to use an exercise bike for the first time today. It is a special bike that you wheel the chair up to, then strap the feet onto the pedals. The left leg does the pedalling but of course has the effect of moving the right leg. Fantastic, and there was a visible reduction in the swelling in Simon's right leg just from a few minutes' workout. He is hoping to do a lot more of this.
Back to work to see another postgrad who is interested in doing some work with us. A nice guy and I think he will do a good job for us. Later ran into another postgrad that I taught last semester. On hearing about Simon, he said he and his mates would come to my house at any time to do any heavy, manual jobs - sometimes, I feel overwhelmed by the kindness of Flinders people.
Spent half an hour at a gathering of social science research students and supervisors. It was a good turnout, and I think we will continue to get together from time to time.
Finally back to the hospital via Maccas for Simon's dinner. Found myself nearly asleep on Simon's bed at 6pm. It has been a long week. Home visits arranged for Saturday and Sunday, I hope for a nice warm, peaceful weekend and three points for the Hammers.
Love Marian x

October 15th: Keynote delivered

Phew, what a busy day. Spent much of it on the road shuttling between the City, Flinders and the Hospital. Had to give lectures in two of those places. The keynote went quite well, and I fielded some questions at the end. It was quite a sedate conference with around 70 participants. Was able to pitch in with some nice, recent labour market data on South Australia, all of the forecasts are for workforce expansion. Quite where we will find the 70,000 or so extra bodies that we need to fulfil our requirements in the next five years was a critical question. Skilled migration is one answer, and it may be that we can attract some people from NSW and Victoria with our lifestyle. Of course, we don't have enough water for them, so they will have to get used to washing in sand! The only time I have washed in sand was in the outback, where there really is no water, and it was quite effective except that my hair stood up like Dennis the Menace for about a week. Anyway, most importantly, we need more accountants and auditors, so any of you guys in the UK struggling with recession, get yourself a skilled migrant visa and we will welcome you to Adelaide with open arms.

Mel started her new job yesterday - working with a terrific outfit that designs exclusive (really) travel experiences and accommodation for very elite clients. Their accommodation portfolio is out of this world. Mel is going to add so much value to this business, she is absolutely in her element. Good on ya, Mel.

With all my rushing around, I didn't get to Simon until past 6pm. He was already in bed feeling a bit off-colour. He felt cold and didn't want to eat. I did persuade him to eat something, and a very kind nurse took the ham sandwich that was delivered on his tray and toasted it for him. He perked up quite a bit after that.

He received a wonderful present in the post from the Swifts netball team in NSW, they sent him a team photo with all of their signatures. It is a real treasure, and we will display it on his bedroom wall. The male nurses on the ward have all popped in to have a look, I noticed that all of them, to a man, crouched down to see if it was possible to look up their skirts! Naughty boys. Anyway, thanks Swifts, also for the lovely get well card that you sent to Simon. You are on our 'heaven list'; Simon and I have a list of people that we would invite round for tea when we get to heaven. The list is quite lengthy and growing.

Rushed home worrying that Skippy hadn't been fed and would be fretting. He was still in bed....

Love Marian x

October 14th: Simon visits McLaren Vale

Buzzed around a lot today. In to work for consultation and stuff, up to see Simon for lunch, then back for my lecture which went well, I think. Back to the hospital for 3.30pm to collect Simon for our big trip to McLaren Vale. We eventually got away in the taxi with a wonderful driver, Raymond, mature and experienced. He told us that they used to train their drivers by making them sit in a wheelchair in the back of the cab then roar around Adelaide with them hitting speed bumps at 5omph, screaming to a halt at traffic lights, and taking bends at outrageous speeds. This taught new drivers what it was like to be a wheelchair passenger with a bad driver. I do not know why they discontinued this training, very valuable experiential learning if you ask me.

Got to the Vale early, so we were dropped of at the pub - good access. Simon had a sneaky beer, then we walked to our potential new home. We found a secret way, known only to a few, using a side passage behind the chinese restaurant. There are some wicked kerbs, but fortunately Gerry was in charge of the wheelchair and we had two portable ramps with us (great things).
So we arrived at the house, got in with the portable ramps, and managed to explore most of the house and garden in the wheelchair. Gerry was studying this and can see where we need to widen doors etc. The damp problem seems to be unimportant. Simon loves the house, and has designs on whole chunks of it for his music collection. I am so relieved that he likes it, and now we can proceed with the purchase.

From there, we went to the Barn restaurant, just on the corner. Had an excellent meal and even better wine. I managed to find a half bottle of wine that Simon had wanted to taste for two years, Simon Hackett's Shiraz. It was excellent. Margaret and Gerry joined us for dinner, good company, and essential assistance. Thanks guys.

Mel started her new job today - congratulations! Now you can believe that the Oz economy is in good shape. The Wynne family alone are awesome for their productivity and added value. I predict that South Australia is going to be a ripper these next few years, tell your friends, and come to SA; we need more good people in SA (but please bring your own water...).

Returned Simon to rehab tired but in good spirits. Helped to get him to bed and left him warm and cosy. I hope that today gave Simon a glimpse of a very positive future for us.

Love Marian x

13th October: Lashing rain

If anybody ever tells you that South Australia is a dry state, disbelieve them. This has been an outrageous day for rain, near invisibility on the road. I simply had to trust in the driver in front of me, and the person behind me had to do the same. Wicked. It is the kind of rain that could knock you down, seriously you poms don't know what rain is. Consequently, I have been soaked through twice today. Had the curious experience of a student consultation session with both of us visibly steaming from the knees. We chose not to speak of it. Silly really.
Found Simon in good spirits at lunchtime, we worked through our shortlist of abstracts, came up with ten, then six that fitted with a loose theme. This selection process feels so much like being in a star chamber. I worry about those that we are rejecting. Some of them we know are so good that they will go on to find places in other journals and we reject in the hope that they will. Simon even rejected his own paper. Now that is professional.

We spent some time with the occupational therapist discussing the equipment that we will need at home. She has ordered an electric wheelchair, a self-propel shower chair, and a whoopee cushion (air filled cushion for the chair, quite expensive); we also asked about ramps and things that we will need. It may take many months to get the wheelchair and Simon has to convince everyone that he can drive it without running people over (a sort of driving test). For this reason, we have to get Simon to keep paying attention to his right side, where his vision is impaired. So even though it would be more convenient to have everything in his room arranged on his left side, we have to deliberately arrange it on his right hand side to force him to pay attention. Sometimes, I think about what I know about learning theory and wonder why we can't be more creative and sophisticated. Tom Bourner, and others, any thoughts?
Great news from the Swifts Ladies Netball team, they have replied. Good on ya Swifts.
Tomorrow I have planned to take Simon to see our new house (we have until Wednesday midnight to pull out of the contract), I hope he likes it. Important that I get him there before we decide. Gerry is also going to check out a building problem indicated by the ant surveyor, a bit of damp that would attract termites and must be dealt with. After this we will go to the Barn restaurant in McLaren Vale for a lovely meal. I have asked the taxi company for their best, mature drivers. Fingers crossed about that.
Today, Simon declared that he wanted to be free of the hospital by the time Asher arrives so that they can go out on the lash together. I have promised to do all that I can to make that possible. Asher, I hope that your muscles are in good shape! Looking forward to your visit and good luck in your new home.

Marian x

October 12th: Reviewing abstracts

Off to work (Shelly's birthday, they were all having cake lucky things), Shelly proclaimed that she would rather be at work than having a day off for her birthday because she loves Flinders so much. Told you, Flinders rocks; I'm not making it up. Then off to rehab for Simon's lunch. He was having a speech therapy session, so I was despatched for coffees. Am a bit fed up that the speech therapist makes him do the speech therapy in his bedroom because of the MRSA, she said that she would otherwise have to wipe down her room. I thought she should wipe it down anyway. He only gets to touch the table and a pencil. It is not good that he is being confined to his room in this way. I will take him outside as much as I can. The weather was nasty today. Margaret joined us for lunch and brought Simon two new fleeces that we had ordered from the Blokes Shop. She also took the precaution of buying him a toasted sandwich - just as well, his lunch was not appetising.
This evening we worked through 75 abstracts for the journal, and shortlisted 16. We will work on it again tomorrow to get this down to 10.
Spent the last half-hour on Deal or No Deal, the guy was a wicked gambler and won the car. Never seen that before.
I have written to the Swifts (netball team) to ask them where I can find a poster for Simon's room.
Returned home to a call re the termite inspection. All probably OK, but something to check in the bathroom wall which is damp - termites love damp wood, they get to eat and drink at the same time. Gerry has agreed to come and look at this on Wednesday and I am hoping to spring Simon from rehab to come look at the place at the same time. We will go armed with a ramp and bits of handy wood to make sure we can get Simon into the house. I hope that he likes it. While in the Vale, I will see if we can book a restaurant for Wednesday evening, that will round off our day nicely.
Marian x

October 11th: Simon the Commis Chef

A bit of housework this morning, then off to collect Simon from rehab. Found him in good spirits and ready to go. The whole of our neighbourhood had decided it was the day for garage sales and we popped into the neighbour's three doors down. Simon scored a tigger soft toy to go with his collection, he does look a bit like Skippy.
Home for lunch and then some music. Simon sat out in the shade and directed my gardening activities. I was just pottering really, tidying up and weeding. He is desperate to go to the garden centre and spend loads on plants, but of course that needs to wait until we have moved. In McLaren Vale, there are two garden centres that he could get to in his wheelie, so they are in for a sales bonanza when Simon arrives.
At tea-time, Simon announced that he was going to help in the kitchen, here you can see him making the salad which he did quite well (note our cat Skippy trying to sneak into a kitchen cupboard). His plan is to learn to cook properly so that he can have my dinners ready when I come home from work. Good plan, Shurv!
In a further break for independence, Simon has decided that he will take taxis from and to rehab by himself at weekends. I wasn't too happy about this but agreed to a compromise, I will drive to the hospital and see him into the taxi, checking out the driver and vehicle first. If I am happy, he travels alone and I drive my car in front. Then for the return in the evening, I check out the driver and vehicle, and if satisfied he travels back alone. This worked well today because we had two mature drivers with good vehicles. I phoned to check that Simon had arrived safely, of course he had.
Rain this evening to save me from watering the yard.
Love Marian x

10th October: Comfy at home

Found Simon out in the hospital garden this morning, he was already sunburned on the neck and arms, thankfully someone had slapped a flat cap on his head. Headed straight off in a taxi - not the best journey, it was one of the smaller cabs, quite uncomfortable and then the driver overcharged. What kind of dirty scoundrel overcharges disabled people?

We popped into Jan's nextdoor and ended up staying for lunch which was very good. Back home, and after checking the email Simon decided he would like to get in his new armchair. He made the transfer from the wheelchair very easily, and here we see him with Skippy on his knee. This chair has many electronic functions including lifting the occupant to a near stand. We don't really know how to use the remote control - the instructions are useless, so it is a matter of trial and error. Getting out of the chair was less easy, and I shouted for Jan next door to come and assist. In fact Simon made the transfer without any lifting assistance from us, we just needed the confidence of having another person on hand.

We watched TV, a spot of dinner, then back to rehab in another small taxi, thankfully with a good driver who didn't charge like a wounded bull. Got him settled in then home. A spot of ironing, then a nice bath and bed for me.

Love Marian x

9th October: Settling down

Off to work early to deliver a full-day workshop on negotiations. Only four students, and they were all lovely. Knocked out most of my input by 11.30 then set them up in two groups on a fiendish negotiation exercise. I was able to steal away for an hour to visit Simon at Repat, and was happy to find him sitting out in the day room with his fish and chips lunch (always the same of Fridays). They had not yet had confirmation of the MRSA, and so he was still in the same bedroom.
Back to work for the afternoon workshop. The students eventually did reach a negotiated settlement, but only after lying, cheating, and going to the brink of walk-out. Funny this, since when I asked them to assess their preferred conflict handling style first thing this morning, they all claimed to prefer collaborative approaches! We also gathered some nice insights into their previous experiences of negotiating - everything from buying cars from dodgy dealers to the role of mothers in brokering peace between battling siblings. I was pleased with my day's work and left them with homework to devise a plan to negotiate their own starting salaries. A very real assignment for them.
Dashed home to cook something for Simon's tea, managed to put a reasonable meal together, then back to the hossie. In the meantime, Simon's MRSA had been confirmed and identified; it is a very common one and well understood. I think there is at least one other case on the ward, not someone that Simon has had close contact with, so may have been passed by health staff. Hand hygiene is the most important containment technique. We are asked to use an alcohol gel on our hands when entering and leaving a room, this is straight forward enough. This germ will not make Simon ill, it is actually widespread in the community, many people carry it on their skin. It is only the risk to very sick patients, especially those with surgical wounds, or poor immune systems e.g. chemo patients, that presents the problem and so they must do everything possible to isolate it. Repat has a very good reputation of fighting this, and even recently recorded a 150 day spell of no MRSA incidents, a rare thing.
Simon has been moved to his own room, and it is rather pleasant looking out onto a garden courtyard, and he has a patio door that he can open and go walk about if he chooses. Also the luxury of his own bathroom which is roomier than the old one. With a bit of cheering up, it will be quite comfortable. I plan to take in some posters for the walls - inevitably he asked for a poster of the Swifts ladies netball team! Another advantage is that Simon can now choose which side of the bed to put his table. In the old room everything was put on his right hand side, which is the wrong side of course. All in all, things are not so bad. The staff are using gloves, but not masks or gowns because the germ is not airborne. That's a great relief for Simon, he was freaked out when his physio team turned up yesterday gowned and masked, he thought they were going to take him to surgery. His Doctor has been in and out several times today talking to Simon and explaining that he is safe, which he is. So too are all the people who have visited Simon. Visitors are still always welcome, just follow the hand hygiene instructions displayed around the ward.
George, Simon's old room mate, is leaving Repat next Tuesday. He is going to a hospital at Meningie which is only 70kms from his home (currently he is around 250kms away from home). This will give his family better access. They hope from there to get him home completely once the alterations to his house are complete. Simon and George have promised to stay in touch, and we will try to meet up with him at his son's hometome of Strathalbyn which is not so far from us. George has been a very good mate to Simon and I thank him. What struck me about George was that although he had everything to complain about what had happened to him, he never once did complain.
Thanks to David McGladdery for the talking books - great series of Peter James novels, I have read three of them so will appreciate them too. Simon spoke with Shirley last night and said that she had a good night out with Eleanor and then Asher collected her next day. Hope the English weather is behaving well.
Simon will come home for Saturday and Sunday afternoon. We plan to review some abstracts for a journal that he edits, then relax and chill out. He took five steps in the gym today. This evening, Simon told me the only thing he could give me was his heart; that's good enough for me, Shurv. Just keep it ticking.
Love Marian x

8th October: Superbug

Had a good start to the day, worked on some papers then into see Simon briefly for lunch. Caught the end of the speech therapy session where, sure enough, Simon had imposed his own agenda and had the therapist helping him to send text messages! Had to dash away for my lecture starting at 1pm and made it in good time. Unfortunately, the video recording of my lecture yesterday had great visual but no audio, the lapel mic wasn't working and because I move about constantly the lectern mic didn't pick up much. I now have the task of recording a podcast this evening. At today's lecture I stuck myself to the lectern and told the students to signal to me if they saw me drifting from my post. It was really quite uncomfortable being forced to stand in one place, not my style at all. However, it had the desired result and the broadcast is fine (apart from my mobile ringing, most embarassing). At the end of the class a young man waited behind to talk to me, he is about 23 years old and has an acquired brain injury from which he is now nearly recovered. This happened in a car accident over two years ago, and the effect of the injury is similar to what has happened to Simon. He generously shared information about his journey to recovery. His speech is fluent, he can use both hands, and he walks without sticks. I was so inspired and thank him if he is reading this blog today. I told Simon about you, he says "terrific".
Unfortunately, the phone call during the lecture turned out to be from the hospital. Simon has tested positive for an MRSA, a superbug. He was extremely upset about this. Instantly the staff implemented barrier nursing procedures: masks, gowns, gloves; he is being kept separated from other patients as much as possible, and they plan to move him to a single room tomorrow. So he and George will be broken up. This is such a shame, and I know that the move tomorrow will be stressful. Worse still, I cannot be there because I have a full teaching day. I had a quick look on the web about MRSA, and realise that I just don't know enough about microbiology to be able to offer any suggestions. The path lab were still working on finding out which strain we are dealing with.
Managed to help Simon to bed with only one nurse assisting, I think that I can do this on my own now, and will attempt this tomorrow. The only positive spin on today's news that I could think of was that Simon having the privacy of his own room opens up all sorts of possibilities....
I was warned early on that there would be many set-backs on this journey. Send up some prayers please.
Love Marian x

October 7th: Shirley lands safely

Off to work this morning, a busy week with quite a bit of teaching. Knocked out some more tute notes then off to see Simon for lunch. He was well rested and brighter today. He was disgusted with the vegetable lasagne they gave him for lunch and pushed this away. I tasted it, and agreed, it bore little resemblance to a lasagne (pasta far from al dente) and the vegetable component seemed to be cabbage! I promised to make it up to him with fish and chips for tea. Spent half an hour in the sunshine in the secret garden where Simon told me that he had managed to take four steps in the gym this morning, his physios had aimed for two. Well done, Shurv. Also he was talking about his plan to learn how to use the text messaging feature on his phone, and so you might expect a few practice texts over the next week or so. His phone is not the best thing, the keypad is tiny and I can barely see the screen. I will look for something more suitable - for this, I will need to consult some young people!
Spent a pleasant afternoon in the lecture theatre and consultation meetings. I am trying to engage our students with reflective learning and have set a learning journal assessment for them. They were confused. So I tried a bit of self-disclosure today. Told them what had happened to Simon and that I keep this blog (a type of journal), and that from time to time I reflect on the amazing stuff that I have learned over the last three months, giving some examples. Also that I have reflected on the things that I still need to learn, and my limitations. I could see the penny-dropping in every part of the lecture theatre. My students now have the address of this blog. Hi guys, welcome to my little corner of the world! Looking forward to working with you over the next few weeks.
Dashed around the supermarket, bought fish and chips, and off to the hospital to see Simon. I told him all about my day, and he interjected many times to ask questions about the lecture.
Home to the news that Shirley has landed safely, has just had a full English breakfast in her Bed and Breakfast at Gatwick, and is now planning a long snooze. Night night, sleep tight.
Then just now an email from Simon's student, Matthew, he has been interviewed by ABC radio news (similar to the BBC for you poms) about their paper on rescuing the archives of low lying nations. This will be aired Thursday or Friday, and will be available as a recording on www.radioaustralia.net.au/pacbeat. Good on you, boys.
I am struggling a little to keep Simon positive, he knows that three months was a big milestone clinically and that we will have to battle our way from here, inch by inch. Keep the messages coming please, they lift both of us.
Love Marian x

6th October: Shirley flies to London

Up early and did a spot of gardening and some work before taking Shirley to the airport. She was quickly checked in at the Qantas desk, and even got to take her excess luggage without being charged. We were issued with a miniscule wheelchair and told to wait at the coffee shop on the departures side. Getting through the security screen was quite a palaver, but eventually we got through and settled Shirley at the coffee shop with a cappucino and a biscuit. The flight got away almost on time I think and good weather all the way up to Singapore. Shirley will land there in about an hour's time. Hope she managed to get some kip.
From the airport straight to the hospital to see Simon at lunchtime. I found him very tired and not wanting to eat. Managed to persuade him to eat some fish and some fruit. Margaret and Raina came to visit, and that perked him up a bit - he likes to see the baby, she is wonderful entertainment. Today she was chattering with George, and skipping around like a wallaby. Simon had OT and physio appointments this afternoon, but he couldn't make it, he was visibly wilting in the chair. So I arranged for him to be helped into bed, and left him to snooze.
Finally made it to work to see my research student. She had been trying to phone me to say she hadn't got much done and could we postpone. So I agreed to see her again later in the week. Slippages in research schedules are inevitable especially when you are raising kids and working. Managed to knock out some notes for my tutors for next week's seminars - might possibly have given them too much to do.
Drove down to Marion to the library and had to fess up about my late returns. They were very forgiving and said that I was one of their best offenders!
Back to the hospital with a take-away from Maccas to find Simon still in bed, but terribly uncomfortable and wet. He had tried to drink a cup of tea lying down. This had gone straight down his neck and he was lying in a pool of cold tea. The staff were all busy with supervising dinner and dishing out drugs, so I managed to get him undressed, washed down, sheet changed, dressed in pyjamas, and sitting up comfortably watching Deal or No Deal. It did take a bit of effort and ingenuity, but I am pleased to have achieved this. One step closer to coming home.
Simon enjoyed his Angus burger and chips - not good for him to have often, but better than the chick pea curry that they had planned for him this evening (it was gruesome). At least I didn't have to cook this evening.
Not sure why Simon was so tired today. It could be that we had three day's home leave and that took it out of him, although yesterday we were very relaxed at home. It could be a medication thing. Hoping that he will pick up tomorrow, not good to miss physio four days in a row.
Have to dash around the rest of the week, lecturing tomorrow and Thursday, then a full day workshop on Friday. Worried about how I will cover Simon's lunchtime sessions now that Shirley has gone home. I will see if Mel and Pen can come down on Thursday or Friday.
Skippy has been worried all day. He saw Shirley's suitcases, and always associates these with being shoved in a catbox, sent half way round the world, and left starving in quarantine. When I got home he was very relieved and has spent the last half hour wrapped round my ankle while I write this blog - very warm actually, must get one for the other leg.
Simon now has his mobile phone at the hospital and may be making calls. If you hear from him, he can understand everything that you say, so tell him everything.
Love Marian x

5th October: Three months

Up early, checked the Hammers result (fair) then whipper-snipped the grass verge. Pesky job, the line keeps breaking and you have to stop and reset it every 3 minutes. Serves me right for buying the cheap strimmer from Bunnings (B&Q for you poms).

This is the photo that I was trying to put up yesterday. Here we see Simon and George being loaded into the Access Taxi. I usually sit beside Simon. Look at the colour of George, brown as a berry - he is a farmer, from country Australia.

We had a public holiday today (Labour Day), and I was able to bring Simon home for the afternoon. We watched "The Chant of Jimmy Blacksmith" - more violent than I had expected despite reading the book decades ago. I know that Kennealy has been roundly criticised for this work, but it still taught me some things.

We had a nice meal using veg from the garden, then time for Simon and Shirley to say farewell. This was tearful and choking. I am mindful of Jelina's comment on yesterday's post, in Ngarrindjeriwe culture they don't say "goodbye", they say "see you later...".

See you later, Shirley.

We are now exactly three months into Simon's Journey. I reflect on that terrible night three months ago, and thank God that Simon has been saved. Simon does not always see it that way, but I know that the rest of you do.

Love Marian x

4th October: Simon and George at home

Couldn't work out the camera today, so have uploaded a photo of Simon walking in the gym last week.

Daylight savings time arrived today, I forgot and was rushing about already an hour late for everything this morning. That aside, we had an excellent day. After signing the contract on the new house I picked up Simon and his room-mate, George, from Rehab and back home for a nice lunch. We managed to get them both into one access taxi. George now has an electric wheelchair so very easy for him to get around; he reckons this wheelchair is worth around $16,000 and all provided for by the state. Nice work South Australia. We cooked steak, chips and salad washed down with a couple of cold ones. George was good company, and I hope these two lads will stay in touch after rehab.

We listened to some nice music, then the lads fell asleep in the sunshine. Don't worry I protect them from the rays. While they slept I made a pizza for tea. Checked their blood sugars, then returned them to rehab in perfect condition. I am a little proud of myself that I could manage two very disabled men without incident.

Daylight savings produced a wonderful free hour to work in the garden this evening. So despite the inconvenience at the beginning of the day, I was very grateful for it by this evening.

Simon comes home again tomorrow because we have a public holiday. He has requested a quiet day indoors with the DVD. Perfect .

Love Marian xx

3rd October: Come on Ozzie, come on, come on...

Today I became an Australian Citizen, no longer a pom, and will be cheering for the home side next ashes series. Do not worry, I am still a hammers supporter - there are no rules against that, even Obama supports West Ham (hopeless optimists we are). Today's picture shows me with the Mayor of Holdfast Bay receiving my precious certificate. That's 'going straight to the pool room'. Wonder how many poms will get that reference! Now I am just showing off my Ozzie credentials and must stop it.

Got to rehab at 8am to get Simon ready for his long day out. It was my first experience of getting Simon up, washed, dressed, shaved, breakfast from start to finish. Quite challenging actually, and an insight into the extent of help that I am going to need when Simon comes home. However, we got away on time and arrived at Glenelg very early so whiled away some time in a cafe. It was so nice just to be a couple in a cafe on a Saturday morning. I have resolved to do more of that type of thing, and it seems that Glenelg is a good destination for us - excellent wheelchair access. We would love to live there but the prices are well outside our range. Also discovered that it is possible to get the wheelchair onto the tram which takes us right into Adelaide, now we are rocking. Plenty of venues and CD shops and high end gear that Simon wants to get his hands on!

I digress. From the cafe to the Town Hall for the Citizenship Ceremony - all very nicely done. We had my sister Margaret, her husband Gerry, my nieces Melanie and Penny, Shirley, and Marg Stovall. Marg works with me and I was so made up that she turned out for me today. Marg, you are a trooper, and thank you so much for the lovely present.

We all gathered in a magnificent council chamber, red carpet everywhere. I stood to take the oath, received my certificate from the Mayor, and that was about it. Except that it was really a very emotional thing to be accepted as a citizen of this lucky country. I feel very proud to be an Australian today.

After the ceremony, we went to a cafe. Simon did a quick detour to the CD shop with Mel, then onto lunch at the Dublin Pub. They were really excellent. Good food and service, easy access, just very nice. We were very relaxed. Then my phone rang. The estate agent. Our offer on the house in Mclaren Vale is accepted! Can this week get any better?

Simon and I spent a little more time shopping then home for the afternoon. He snoozed under the front verandah while I mowed the lawn. A spot of tea, then back to rehab for a well earned rest for Simon. He was exhausted, happy, but desperate to get home permanently. It will soon come, my Simon.

Love Marian x

PS we have an unexpected day off on Monday (I never remember the public holidays), so Simon can come home three days in a row.

2nd October: Busy day

Ran Shirley to the dentists first thing, then back to see an estate agent, made an offer on a house now we wait.... the owners are in India on holiday so may not be reading email regularly (not that they are short of IT there). A spot of reading, then off to see Simon. Fish and chips for his lunch. One of Simon's speech therapists was leaving today (a student at the end of her placement). She is a very lovely person and Simon wanted to thank her with a present. We found a box of chocolates and he gave them to her this afternoon. She was really touched.

Left Simon in a happy state while I returned to work for a meeting with my Phd student. He is at the reading-in stage, and it was fascinating to observe a student discovering concepts from the literature that I had almost forgotten the origins of: Marx, Durkheim, Weber. It is good to touch base with these great works again. His work will be on some aspect of work-life balance. At the end of the tutorial I asked him to spend some time reflecting on his own work-life balance - like most part-time students he is juggling way too many eggs. I am co-supervising this thesis with a superb colleague from NILS, a sociologist who did her Phd about activists (trade unionists, peace campaigners, and womens' rights campaigners), their passion, and the way in which they fit their lives, family and work around this. Real good stimulation.

Dashed back to Rehab for Simon's tea, to find him wheeling himself out of the building declaring that he had to get away from there. I quickly went to investigate what might have been happening in his room (we did have a wandering patient yesterday claiming to have been kidnapped and offering Simon money to help her escape). When I got there, only George in a brand new electric wheelchair, nothing wrong at all. Shirley intercepted Simon at the front door, and I took him for a walk to calm down, could only determine that something had happened at 4.30pm, and he had been pushed. George managed to tell me that a casual member of staff had wheeled Simon off at 4.30pm then recently brought him back smashing him into the door frame, and Simon was demanding to be left alone. It took me ages to persuade him to go into dinner, then the dinner was revolting so had to rush to the cafe and get a baked potato for him. I was run ragged. Eventually I got to the bottom of it. A casual member of staff came to collect Simon at 4.30pm and wheeled him into the dreaded dining room despite his protests, which I can imagine were blue. When he tried to wheel himself out again he was pushed back and told to stay there. At this point he put up such a fight that a regular member of staff discovered the situation and said that he was to be taken back to his room to wait for his family, and at this point they smashed into the door. A long story, but illustrative of some of the difficulties that Simon has to deal with on this steep road to recovery. It is good that he is prepared to put up a fight, also that Shirley and I arrived just in time to stop him hurtling down the Goodwood Road!
Simon was still upset this evening, and it took a long time to pacify him. I tried to lift him by describing all of our planned events for this weekend. We have a public holiday on Monday, so I will be allowed to spring him from Rehab three days in a row. I am hoping that he will be able to get into his new armchair (complete with gentle ejector seat) - although this time I will make sure to have plenty of help at hand.
Too tired to cook so Shirl and I had take-away fish and chips this evening. Terrific.
Love Marian x

1st October: Short back and sides

Two meetings this morning then off to see Simon, arrived in time to join him for speech therapy. This was a good session using the computer, they are trialling some new software which gets the patient to look at pictures and select matching words, also listening to spoken sentences then clicking the image that best represents the situation being described. Simon zipped through several levels making only two errors, and even I thought the pictures on those two were hard to see. Simon was able to use the mouse competently with his left hand. The speech therapist said that he had made great strides over the past week. I was really pleased.
We had lunch in his room then the hairdresser came, she gave him a neat short back and sides, and he looks quite handsome. I had forgotten to take him any clean shirts, so was dispatched to the shops to buy two new polos. Then back to work for a while. Dropped by Glenelg to check the wheelchair access at the Town Hall (all good) and reccied a chair friendly route around the town. On the way back to my car I came across a disability equipment shop having a closing down sale. I scored a beautiful electric lifting/reclining chair for half price in blue leather. It will actually lift you from sitting to a near stand, and vice versa. We will test this out on Saturday arvo.
This evening we had a short visit, dinner was rather grey so we had to get him a pie. After a spot of TV I wheeled him back to his room where we were joined by an unfortunate wandering lady who has amnesia. She was telling us that she had been kidnapped and if we could get her out her parents would give us a lot of money (she was in her late 60s). I went to get a nurse urgently and on return found her trying to hide behind Simon's curtains! Poor thing doesn't know what is happening to her, but a bit distressing. I hope she doesn't make a habit of hiding in Simon's room. I hurried back to Marion to get my hair cut - Simon's is rather better than mine and cost a third of the price!
Just phoned Simon to say goodnight, he was trying to tell me that someone had phoned him. He told me it was John Lennon! After some discussion, I realised that he meant Asher (sorry Asher he doesn't get on so well with names), so for tonight you are an ex-Beatle. Anyway, we learned that you have been successful in getting the house. Well done! and Thanks to St Joseph. Now we need St J. to watch over our next venture into the property snakepit. I only began the process of house-buying/selling in earnest a week ago and already feel stressed. Roll on Friday.
Love Marian x