Simon Shurville's journey to recovery

21st July 2011: Final blog

2011-07-21T02:06:00.000-07:00

I think i will make this my final blog. Not many people reading or responding these days and it takes up time.

Simon is well. We have many challenges with his disabilities that place great strains on us, but we are strong together.

It looks like he will be dismissed from UniSa very soon. That is a depressing thing for Simon because he always intended to get back to work, but two years is too soon after such a devastating injury, and the University were unable to provide any guarantee of access to their buildings. We still have not received the personal items that were in his office before he became ill. Personally, I now think that UniSa are poor employers and I don't much care that they hear me say it (I am also employed by them for Phd supervision). I won't work for them again, and will never recommend that anybody should. Enough said.

I would love to be able to tell you that Simon is walking, talking, writing and working. He does a bit of all of those things at about 15% (walking)-60% (talking). It would be nice if people who knew him and worked with him would keep in touch. It does help.

So I sign off now. Thanks to those who supported us all this time.

Our love, Marian, Simon, and Skippy xx

4th July 2011: Nearly two years

2011-07-04T06:01:00.000-07:00

Hi everyone,

On 6th July it will be the second anniversary of Simon's devastating stroke. He is alive and, although very disabled, he is quite well, and I feel so proud of him for this incredible achievement. I hope that you will join me in congratulating him and wishing him well. Simon would be pleased to hear from you. He can read and respond to email and has a gmail address that you can guess.

I am so busy that I cannot find time to visit this blog too often but will try to do so once each month.

Much love,

Marian

31st May 2011: Winter approaches

2011-05-31T03:41:00.000-07:00

Hi friends, sorry it has been so long. I work, spend as much time as I can with Simon, then sleep and try to optimise those three elements of my life. Actually I am failing in this and wondering what I should do for the best. I spoke with our Priest about this. He advised me to go where my heart sends me. Well, my heart sends me to Simon and to my students, so I guess that means that I have to stop sleeping! It will soon be the end of our teaching semester and I may get to have a break for a week soon.

No more complaining. Simon is trying to maintain his fitness, we exercise everyday and he goes to a sports physio twice each week. He also goes to the Springboard programme in the City once per week. This is a little bit tedious for him, sometimes he has to spend twenty minutes patting a balloon across a table - not quite the level of intellectual stimulation that we were hoping for. We do as much as we can at home. It would be good if any of you who live locally could come to visit Simon, he does lift when we have visitors (and by the way, we have a very good stash of fine wine and a spare room).

Simon continues to add to his music collection, we will soon need to build an extension to accommodate this. Meanwhile, I still enjoy reading eclectically - recently discovered Bryce Courtenay, 'Smokey Joe's Cafe', and very special was Leonardo Padura Fuentas, 'Adios Hemingway'. Now I can't decide whether I should read Hemingway or consign his books to the compost heap. Better not take the risk, just in case EH got to heaven.

We planted two fruit trees: a plum and a peach, both saplings from our neighbour Maria's garden. We have had good rains and so the garden is very productive. We already have carrots and beets, some chillis, radish, rocket, parsley, and even some mandarins.

Skippy is as fit and cranky as ever. If you never saw the utube on Simon's Cat, look it up, it is Skippy to a tee.

First day of winter for us tomorrow. All you folks in the Northern Hemisphere - have a good summer and make the most of it.

Much love, Marian

19th March 2011:

2011-03-18T23:07:00.000-07:00

A while since I've been online here, sorry about that. Much to report, and mostly good. Simon is now several weeks into the Springboard programme in Adelaide, and has successfully passed his probation period there, so he can stay with them for up to 3 years. The programme is run mainly by volunteers and involves lots of group sessions. Simon finds some of these a bit humdrum e.g. they often have a session where they pat a balloon across the table to each other! However, this is interspersed with valuable speech therapy and physio. It is a very long journey for him, so we have decided to just go on one day each week. We go to a local sports physio twice per week, and he is making good progress there.

Last week Simon gave his second speech at Flinders University to the Speech Pathology students. He did really well and we received some wonderful feedback from the students. He is going to be a regular guest speaker for them from now on. Next week, Simon, Matthew and I will give a seminar at Flinders Business School, this will be an important milestone, and we hope that it will launch Matthew's research into a new phase.

We have had a great harvest of squash, tomatoes, peppers, and chilis. I am now trying to persuade some carrots and beets to grow. My neighbour, Maria, advises me about the moon-cycles which give an indication of the best times to sow seeds. This may be where I have been going wrong in the past.

My sister, Margaret, set off on a cruise holiday today to Japan!! I hope that they will be safe. They are very good travellers, but even so, when you are stuck on a ship there are not so many options. However, Margaret is the type of person who would wrest control of the ship and turn it around by herself if necessary. I fully expect to see her steaming up the Torrens with a jolly roger at the mast, wearing an eyepatch and shouting "Arrhharrr, Jim lad...."

Our air conditioning is broken, and is going to be horribly expensive to repair. Luckily, we have not had a hot summer and so we have managed without. I will need to repair it because the same system also gives us heating in the winter. Simon needs heating because he is not able to move around enough to keep warm.

We bought a new PC and this is helping Simon a lot. I am trying to set up narrator and want to get some dragon speak software. Anyone used this? Any good? Next week, I will give my first live on-line tutorial - very scary but I want to crack the technique. We still have limitations, because Oz broadband is underdeveloped at best we have ADSL, not even at the speeds we were getting in the UK five years ago. There is a national plan to improve this but it has been contentious and many delays. I am involved in a project to deliver an MBA with a regional/rural focus, and I desperately want to get the online stuff working well. My poor long suffering undergraduate students are the victims of my experiential learning. Don't worry, I will look after them, even if I have to replicate the tutorial physically each week.

Skippy caught a mouse recently. He strutted around the house triumphantly for many days.

We feel blessed to be in this part of the world that is so untroubled. Even other parts of Australia have been terribly damaged this year, and it has been terrifying to watch that happening. I don't know if prayers help, but I keep trying.

Lots of love, Marian

4th February: Start of Springboard programme

2011-02-03T19:54:00.000-08:00

Simon began his new rehab programme on Wednesday. We have to travel into the City for this, and here he is having survived the first day. We went into Rundle Mall to pick up his beloved watch - he is showing off the new strap.

Simon goes to the Springboard programme twice a week - a long journey for him, so next week I have booked us into the youth hostel for the night so that he doesn't have to travel so much. We will see how that goes.

The first day at Springboard I was permitted to stay and participate, but they made it fairly clear that this was an exception and after that Simon has to attend on his own. They are a jolly bunch of people, very positive, and I can see him getting on well with them. They did give him a bit of grief about wearing his hat indoors. They wanted to take it and put it in a cloakroom. Simon never lets his hat out of his sight, and he stood his ground. Quite right.

I have been back at work, teaching and dealing with the supplementary assessments. Now it is time to get ready for the new semester. We have a number of new research students starting and they all need a bit of attention, but hopefully the other students will help them to settle in. A lot of them are from overseas and a long way from home.

We managed to find a decent paver 'Dave the Pave', and he spent last week relaying our patio, and the driveway. It had got very wavy which was not great for Simon's safety. He did a great job. He also removed a flower bed and paved over it which has upset Skippy who was accustomed to using this flower bed for his morning constitutional. Each day he goes out, looks at the new pavers and sniffs them, in the hope that somehow his treasured flower-bed will be restored. The first photo shows him stretched out in the middle of what used to be the flower-bed. Note our wheelchair accessible vehicle in the background (it is a monster and I am still learning to drive it).

Many thanks for the birthday cards for both of us. I had some lovely presents, including a luxurious pair of pink Ugg slippers. Reet cosy.

Love to all,

Marian x

January 13th: Simon's big trip to the City

2011-01-13T02:27:00.000-08:00

It was Simon's birthday yesterday. After unwrapping presents, we headed off to the City for our first overnight stay in a swish hotel, the Crown Plaza in Adelaide. We went to the cinema and watched "The King's Speech"; Simon was able to relate to the subject of that story and we both felt inspired by it. We had a good day out. It is challenging to stay away from home even in the best hotel, but we learned a lot and will know more the next time.

I am amazed by Simon's courage and his ability to engage people even with limited communication. I found him in a record shop this morning, he had the owner turning over his entire collection looking for rare R&B material; we spent thirty minutes in a cafe and the owner exchanged personal email addresses with him because he wants to talk more about further education; everywhere we go, people love Simon. I think they always did, but he didn't feel it. Now he does, and he appreciates all of your good wishes. Thank you so much for all of the video messages on facebook (and thanks to the genius Asher). We were in tears. It was so good to see you all.

I am teaching tomorrow, a postgrad course on Negotiations. Am tempted to go in with a single powerpoint slide stating: "Split the difference", but I have to make it last three days so must make it more complicated... In truth, I have some fiendish stuff lined up for them and my assessment plan is entirely reflective (Tom, you taught me well and we love you).

Love Marian x

January 3rd: Happy New Year

2011-01-03T02:26:00.000-08:00

Happy New Year to all, let us hope that 2011 will bring more luck and one or two changes of government. We have worried about you all struggling with the snow and ice in Europe. I remember it happened last around 1985, Elm Grove was like a black ski-slope for weeks. However, the following year was excellent for gardening because all the pests had been weakened.

We are having a coolish summer which is the result of La Nina. Some days we are boiling in 35 degree heat and then it switches to 18 degrees. The cricketers are baking one minute and rained off the next. The Ashes series is in the final test stage now and it is very nerve-wracking. Ponting has gone out injured. The English bowlers look very menacing especially with the sticky wickets which seem to suit their style.

Simon is on a break between rehab programmes and we have been managing by ourselves using a local physio. He is making good progress and I can see a time when he will walk again. Tomorrow we are going into Adelaide in our new wagon - this is actually a very old Ford Falcon that will take the powered wheelchair in the back. Simon has to sit in the front seat. It is a tricky operation and so we are doing a practice run tomorrow with the help of my nieces. Next week we will try the run by ourselves. We have booked into a nice hotel for Simon's birthday and plan a good shopping trip (many CDs to buy). I start teaching again on Jan 14th which seems all too soon.

For Christmas, I got a pasta maker. This is brilliant. The first attempt was a bit messy, flour everywhere, and it took both of us (me feeding the machine and Simon cranking the roller), but it was fun, and really delicious. The quantities are a problem, 100gm of flour to one egg, but this feeds at least four people. How to arrive at half an egg is the difficulty. We have masses of tomatoes and courgettes, so heaps of tasty sauce.

Simon has a new home-brew beer kit which is bubbling away in the music room. He plans to invent his own flavoured beer and serve it up to the neighbours from a bar in our garage along with plates of pasta - Simon's Trattatoria!

Skippy has recently been menaced by flocks of cockatoos in the morning. Big white birds that screech for a living. This morning he fled indoors and hid for several hours. Simon is more worried that the cockies will eat our tomatoes but I think they are more interested in the peach crop nextdoor.

Sorry that we didn't get Christmas cards out to everyone this year. We do think about you all and hope that you will stay in touch.

Much Love, Marian x

December 7th 2010

2010-12-07T02:46:00.000-08:00

I think it is just a year since Simon came home from the hospital. People say that time flies. This time it is the opposite. We have struggled through every day. Pleased to say that it has been worth it. All of the things that I was warned about: falls, injuries, bedsores, infections, depression, pain. These have happened. Simon has dealt with all of it, and he is coming through like a real trooper. Some of you knew he would and we thank you for your encouragement.

We finished with the BIRCH team last week, and have to wait to begin with Spingboard in the city in January. In the meantime I have hired a private physio for Simon and she has been fantastic. She has been working on Simon's arm where everyone else had ignored it. I asked him to put his arm out and move a cup yesterday - with massive effort, and mainly from the shoulder he managed to move the cup. This is priceless. Some of you may remember the post where I reported that Simon had asked for his arm to be amputated.

Simon has started to listen to some talking books that Dave sent a while ago. They are all set in Brighton so he has been reminiscing about all of his old haunts. I wonder if any of the old haunts are still going? We know things have been very bad in the UK and hope that the good pubs have survived. At least the Bugle.

We were so sad to hear about Mike Barber. I can only smile when I think of him. I hope he goes to heaven.

Then we heard about Gerry, and we just know that you guys are looking after Trish. We send our love and our prayers.

Marian xx

1st November: Simon's first lecture

2010-11-01T00:34:00.000-07:00

Simon gave his first public lecture since his stroke today. He spoke in front of around 40 speech pathology students at Flinders University on the subject of 'Living with Dysphasia'. You can see him pictured here with his speech pathologist, Kate Elliott, who has helped him to get this far. It was a wonderful speech, and the students gave him a sustained round of applause. Simon aims to write this up for a good journal. I am so proud of him.

There are quite long spaces between blogs now because our lives are so busy. Simon is about to graduate from the BIRCH programme at the end of November. Next he will start with the Springboard programme in the City, and we are looking forward to this next stage.

The powered wheelchair has gone back for some adaptations and to be covered in 'racing vinyl'. Then it will be his for keeps. It has been great for Simon to get around by himself. He can manage trips up to the village by himself, and is getting ready to go further afield. Jeremy, from the Royal Society for the Blind, is going to come back a couple of times to try out new routes, and maybe try access to various forms of public transport into the City.

We have opened talks with UniSA about return to work plans. They have moved Simon's School to Mawson Lakes (four hour round trip from McLaren Vale) so we need to have serious discussions about that. Simon will be in the City at least once per week for his Springboard programme, so I am hoping that UniSA can arrange office space for him at a convenient place in Adelaide.

Meanwhile, I have been working my socks off. So much marking I must be a markswoman by now. Only a few more weeks and I will be able to take a break; need one. I long to sit under a tree and read a good book from start to finish. I still read a lot, but in snatches. Most recently, I read 'The Winter of Frankie Machine" by Don Winslow (this was good), also Damian McDonald "Luck in the Greater West" which might have been less confusing had I known anything about the suburbs of Sydney. My favourite recently was Willy Vlautin "The Motel Life" of which the last two lines are "I hoped. Because hope, it's better than having nothing at all." For all you Hammers fans.....

There are snakes about in the Vale just now - waking up looking for a bite to eat. Skippy is on full alert. Luckily, there is quite a large population of frogs nearby (amphibians, you understand) and the snakes should get a good feed on those. There was a brown snake spotted in the garden of the house opposite us. By the time news of this reached us it was reputed to be 4 inches thick and eight feet long. A bit like those giant spiders that chase English tourists through the botanic park every year.....

Love Marian x

4th October: Marathon Backgammon

2010-10-04T04:29:00.000-07:00

We had a lovely long weekend. I can't remember the reason for this week's public holiday (Queen's birthday maybe? Gaud bless her) but am very grateful for the day's rest. We had Blake visiting Friday/Saturday, he is the wonderful guy that loaned us his Grandad's wheelchair. We were so inspired by Blake; he is four years on from a massive brain injury. Now at Uni, he is developing into a very special man.
Saturday was taken up by the Australian Rules footie final (replay after an unprecedented draw the previous Saturday). Simon and I were pulling for St Kilda. This is a bit like supporting West Ham, and you might guess the result. Thrashed by around 60 points. They were robbed!
In the beautiful spring weather, Simon and I are living in the back yard. We spent Sunday playing backgammon. The last time we played, I could beat him so easily that I would let him win occasionally. This time he walloped me 6-Nil ! Always a bad loser, I insisted on playing on until nearly dusk, eventually prevailing at 7-6. But in truth, you cannot imagine how delighted I was at being beaten hands down in that first session. Our man is back.
We have been testing Simon's new power chair for the last ten days. He is great at driving - really accurate. My efforts at driving it leave large dents in the wall. The chair does need some further adaptation and will need to go back for modification, but we are nearly there. I have had my spanners out and made some elementary improvements.
We completed another paper this week. This was the write-up from Simon's keynote in 2009. Simon is making progress with the powerpoint that he is going to present to the speech pathology studens at Flinders.
Many congratulations to Stephen Pantlin and his wife on the birth of their little one. We hope that you enjoy every precious moment.
Tonight, my thoughts are with Sucheta. I am sending you an electronic hug, my friend, and next time I see you I will smother you with a real one.

Much love, Marian xx

22nd September 2010: Anniversary and other landmarks

2010-09-22T03:04:00.000-07:00

We celebrated another wedding anniversary last Friday. Here you see us on that day pictured at our local Mexican restaurant (recently opened...the chef is not Mexican, and probably not a chef, enough said). However, nice ambience and we were happy.

This week we were invited to have a look at a new rehab programme called Springboard. It is located deep in the centre of Adelaide and we were daunted by the journey. It turns out to be brilliant and exactly what Simon and I had hoped for. A post-medical rehabilitation programme that runs for 1-2 days per week. It includes speech therapy, physiotherapy, and occupational therapies. The people that we met were so positive and committed. They told living stories of other clients who arrived in wheelchairs and left walking. They are prepared to take us on for up to three years. We are hoping to combine this with a return to work programme for Simon.

Here we hit a snag. While in the City, we decided to walk across to Simon's office to pick up some papers and things. He had not been there in over a year. Astonishingly, his office building has no disabled access. We did get into the building with the help of a colleague, Adam, who hauled Simon's wheelchair up a step through a side entrance. It was impossible to reach Simon's office which is down a flight of stairs and there was no ramp. Most disturbing, the toilets were inaccessible for disabled people. I did think poorly about UniSA at this point. I have reported it all to the HR department and hope that they will be able to improve matters.

Not to be discouraged, Simon and I took our first trip on the Adelaide to Glenelg tram. These are accessible, but you have to let the driver know you are there so he can put a ramp out. The tram drivers were brilliant I must say. We stopped off at the City shops (Rundle Mall) for some inevitable CD shopping, then went onto Glenelg (the bay) by tram and stayed there for an hour.

It was an exhausting day, we learned a great deal, and returned feeling challenged but inspired. My inspiration is that I can now see a day when Simon will be independent of me; he will be able to make his own choices about what he does, when, how and who with. I know that very often he would rather be out with the lads than listening to my endless stories of the wonders of Flinders Uni in between commentary on the progress of my new vegetable garden (a patch of ground behind the shed).

Caught up with some research students today, one recently returned from fieldwork in Malaysia. Heaps of data, but the government policy context keeps shifting. No worries, it can only add flavour to the thesis.

Love to all,

Marian xx

30th August: Rosy knees

2010-08-30T00:48:00.000-07:00

Spring is upon us and Simon has decided it is time to change into shorts! Having spent most of his day in the garden he has a wonderful pair of rosy red knees. We got into gardening at the weekend - more veggies: tomatoes, zucchini, eggplant, and far too many chili plants. We are in a contest with our friend, Kerry, to see who can grow the first zucchini from the same seed packet - this could get more competitive than Tenantry Down Allotment Association. We are harvesting spuds and so much broccoli. I have discovered that Broccoli and Blue cheese soup is delicious, and has the added benefit of being a super-food.

Simon is working on a powerpoint that he will present to speech therapy students at Flinders University later this year. Also working on a paper with Matthew G-C on issues concerned with the preservation of archives in low-lying pacific nations. This has been a very interesting project for all of us, and Matthew is making great strides as an early career researcher.

Have just completed the first round of assessment with my Management students at Flinders. I am so pleased to see them engaging and performing well at this early stage. I love them to bits.

Will post some pictures on our Wedding Anniversary.

Love Marian xx

30th July: Onwards and upwards

2010-07-30T00:34:00.000-07:00

Simon has been making significant progress over the last few weeks. It seems like we turned a corner at the 12 month mark, and despite all the pessimism emanating from the research data, his progress has accelerated markedly. Simon now walks regularly holding onto a fixed rail and can manage as much as 50 metres in an hour. The effort that this takes is equivalent to me walking around 5 kilometres, and as a consequence he is losing weight again. In the last two weeks, Simon has learned to stand up from his chair without holding onto the rail. He can stand and balance for around 3 minutes at a time. Once this skill is fully honed he will be able to try walking with a quad stick.

Even more progress has been made in speech therapy. While it is true that my ability to interpret is now very advanced, Simon has been able to hold detailed and complex conversations with his consultant (the wonderful Professor K) and to make and receive telephone calls. He spoke with Stephen Pantlin last week, they were both close to tears I think. Simon now regularly sends email independently, and has stepped up his ebay activity to the extent that we may need to buy a new house to store all the new CDs!

Professor K has suggested that Simon should begin planning his return to work, and recommended that he start by attending some research seminars at the University. We are hoping to arrange this soon.

Meanwhile, we continue to wait for the powered wheelchair. It has at least been ordered, but outrageously we are told that we may have to wait until Christmas for delivery. I know that it is possible to telephone the manufacturers in the USA and have the chair custom-built and shipped within two weeks, but government departments don't work like that. Ho hummm.... It would be pleasingly ironic if Simon were to be walking independently by the time his chair arrived.

We did get given a new powered bed for Simon - we can raise it up and down, lift the head rest to a near sitting position etc. This is much more comfortable for him, although a bit odd with both of us in adjoining single beds. I feel the cold without him. I have tried to persuade Skippy to sleep on my feet to warm them up, but he prefers to sleep on Simon's tummy.

Heard some rumour about Beckham joining West Ham. Oh yeah....

Love Marian x

July 5th: 365 days

2010-07-05T07:22:00.000-07:00

We are exactly one year into Simon's journey. I take a deep breath and hold back some tears. I remember the terrible things that were happening that night a year ago, the confusion, darkness, pain, fear, hopelessness. What if I had lost him? When I saw him this time a year ago he was covered in tubes and wires and a priest was standing over him. We have come a long way.

Simon was at the rehab clinic today and I was at work so we did not get to mark the day, but tomorrow we will. Simon will have lunch with Jeremy from the Royal Society for the Blind - Jeremy helps Simon to find his way around the town in his wheelchair and they sneak into the pub quite often, I think. Tomorrow evening, my family are gathering at our house for a pizza extravaganza (take-away). We will celebrate Simon's survival and our future.

In the last year I have learned more than I was ever taught or self-taught, and come closer to Socratic truth than was comfortable. The one true thing that I know... I love Simon.

Love Marian xx

19th June: Hello again

2010-06-18T14:59:00.000-07:00

It has been a long time since I found my way to this blog, sorry guys. Have been very busy juggling work, home, and Simon's therapies. Today finds me up at an early hour having watched the England match at 4am.

Simon continues with rehab therapy. He travels twice a week to Fullarton for physio, and has speech therapy at home. We are still waiting for a powered wheelchair, although there is some hope that this might happen soon. I was unable to buy this independently. We have had many ups and downs: a couple of falls, pressure sores, and the inevitable depression. On the upside, Simon's speech is really improved, and he has recently made good progress in physio. This week he walked 6 lengths of the parallel bars in the gym (around 60 metres in total). He has also been cooking 2-3 times per week using a slow cooker and lots of chili!

Simon has rediscovered E-bay and has successfully bid on around a dozen CDs. He has also worked out how to download music again. Music has been a lifebelt for us. We managed to go to a concert two weeks ago. A local band, the Yearlings, were playing in McLaren Vale in an old converted church. It was a bring your own grub arrangement. Simon and I turned up with fish and chips in newspaper - everyone else had delicate platters and canapes!

We have had plenty of rain which is good for our veggies. My spuds are up, and the greens are nearly ready. We have grown some wicked, blow-your-socks-off radishes and some rather pathetic beans. I have a constant battle with pests and insects and can often be found hunting caterpillars by moonlight. I found a tip in an old gardening book which advised placing fake plastic butterflies amongst the brassicas to deter the cabbage white butterfly. I spent several hours manufacturing plastic butterflies from old margarine tubs only to discover that they attract the blighters!

Simon's speech therapist is helping him to learn to use his mobile phone. We are planning to go to Noarlunga next week to buy a phone with a full keyboard so that he can text more easily. If you receive odd messages, you might expect them to be from Simon. Apologies to Aidan who regularly gets phoned by accident being first in the address book. By the way, congrats to Aidan on qualifying for his bus pass.

Skippy is as canny as ever. He has our care assistants wrapped around his little paw persuading them that he hasn't been fed for a week and desperately needs an ear rub. It has been cold here and he is a master at finding the warmest places to sleep; we could patent him as an organic heat seeking device. To his credit, the mice have disappeared (there may have been some RatSak involved).

My sister, Margaret, has been having a battle with skin cancer on her face. She has been very stoic about it, but it is a rotten thing. Last night the two of us went out to dinner together for the first time in years. It was really nice. Inevitably we ended up reminiscing about our complicated upbringing . There are only two people in this world that I have truly hated. The other one was Margaret Thatcher.

Thanks to everyone who has kept in touch through the blog and on email. Again, my apologies for being such a slug with the blog. I know that my family in England have been through some difficult times with the passing of our dear Aunt Jean. We have been thinking of you all.

I pick Greece to win the World Cup - who will bet me a dollar? Am even prepared to double it up on West Ham winning an away fixture next season....

Love Marian x

28th April: An independent journey

2010-04-28T03:43:00.000-07:00

Today we passed a great milestone. At 9am, Simon went out in the powered wheelchair and travelled a kilometre by himself reaching a cafe on the Main Street of McLaren Vale. It was nerve wracking, but he has done it. We are so grateful to Jeremy from the Royal Society of the Blind who has been training Simon to use the chair and is so inspiring. We are now trying to buy the right powered chair for Simon so that he will be more comfortable and safer. The occupational therapist came to our house today and has promised to help us to find the right equipment. We gave up on government funding for this. I know that some of you were thinking of getting up a fund to help with this, in which case, now is the time.

Have discovered the 'cheap Tuesday' deal at the local video store and scored some cracking movies: The Damned United is superb for anyone who remembers the legendary Brian Clough and understands English football. I was taken back decades and reminded of the comforts and deprivations of those times. We also saw Inglorious Basterds (that is how they spell it). A tad violent for me, but Simon thought it was brilliant. Now he wants to see Avatar (anyone seen that?).

I was interviewed today by a colleague conducting research into Work Integrated Learning. I found myself quickly embroiled in the Humboldt / Newman stuff about what a University is for. Sometimes I swear Tom Bourner is sitting on my shoulder. Hope so.

Love Marian x

17th April: Simon is home

2010-04-17T00:47:00.000-07:00

Just a quick update today. Simon discharged himself from the hospital yesterday, he could take no more. He is home and happy. The next week is a bit challenging because we have no physio or carer support but I can do some work with him and hope it will be enough to keep him ticking over.

Love Marian x

15th April: A mouse in the house

2010-04-14T18:29:00.000-07:00

Simon is still in the rehab hospital and is deeply unhappy there. It is not quite the boot camp that we were promised, just three hours of therapy per week day and very little at weekends. It is terribly boring for him the rest of the time. The highlight of his week was when I sneaked in a cornish pastie. I will take him to Glenelg on Sunday afternoon for a spot of CD shopping, he has compiled a long list of must-haves. We have another public holiday (ANZAC day) on 26th April, and he has resolved to discharge himself from the hospital that weekend. We have stuck it out because the Professor has insisted and we need her support, but enough is enough.
Meanwhile, back at the ranch I am besieged by mice. What is Professor Skippy Orlando doing about this? Sleeping. What a slouch. Ironically, the mouse living in the pantry has a real liking for cat biscuits.

Simon's veggie patch is in full bloom - here you can see the 'dwarf' beans after just 14 days. It will be about four weeks before we are eating the produce. I did calculate that this project was costing about $20 per kilo of veg produced, but there's nothing like the taste of home-grown produce. I once had an allotment in Brighton which, despite having only four inches of top soil over chalk, produced an enormous glut each year. I can still remember my colleagues running down the corridor at the sight of me trying to give away surplus marrows.

Have had a conference paper accepted and quite pleased about that. It is local, so no need for travel. Am still thinking about Beijing. I could probably arrange for a carer to be with Simon for a few days but I don't like the idea of being so far apart. Sometimes I wish we were in England, especially now that spring is there and winter will soon be here.

Had a close shave on the road last week. Driving back from the hospital in the dark a roo jumped out in front of me. I swerved and missed him but the girl in the car behind me hit him. He was a big chap. I stopped to assist her, she had a little boy in the back seat and was very upset. The police came, threw a rope around the roo and dragged it off to the side of the road. They just left it there and told us to get on our way. I've resolved not to drive in the dark anymore.

We heard about the UK elections. Simon and I are sending in a request for overseas postal votes. Not sure if we will be in time, but with luck we will send two votes. Wouldn't it be something if we tipped the balance? I voted for the first time in Australia recently. These were state parliament and some commonwealth seats. They use proportional representation and the ballot paper was about two foot long. I can remember as a student having to debate the pros and cons of PR, but I don't remember any academic mentioning the practical problems with very long ballot papers. When asked to rank 47 candidates, eventually you lose count, make mistakes, and your pencil runs out of lead. You can alternatively just tick a box for a 'ticket' - which means that you vote for all of the labor (correct spelling in Australia) or liberal candidates etc. Personally, I don't favour this. It can result in the Harvey Proctor scenario (Basildon under Thatcher). So, if any of you are teaching government and politics these days, you might like to add that observation to your lecture notes.

On an academic note, I want to know if anyone out there has experience of using blogs, wikis, on-line social network sites etc. as sources of research data, and how do you persuade research ethics committees that this is an acceptable form of data collection. Pucker academic references would be much appreciated.

Love Marian x

1st April: Trapped in hospital

2010-04-01T00:22:00.000-07:00

Simon was admitted to a private hospital yesterday for four weeks of intensive rehab. This is intended to give him a much needed boost of physio. It was a hard decision to accept to go back into the hospital environment, but we felt it was for the best. The shock came when we were told that he could not have weekend home leave because our private health insurance company would cut the funding if he was not in his bed by midnight every night! This is just bureaucratic nonsense, but there seems to be no way around it. Simon hates the place and I am very anxious about leaving him there. Ironically, the hospital is just around the corner from our old house in Brighton.

It is a long weekend, and I am told that I can take him out on Friday and Sunday, so I plan to bundle him into the car and drive down to the coast - even if I can just get him out in the fresh air for a few hours it will be a break from the hospital drudge. If any colleagues would like to visit Simon in the evenings he would greatly appreciate it. The hospital is in Hove, and if you email Simon's gmail address I can tell you exactly where to find him.

Skippy is upset because Daddy's away, and has decided to take it out on the female cat across the road again. What did we do to deserve a misogynistic cat?

We have decided against the Beijing trip for the time being. The cost of business class fares was monstrous, and I couldn't really justify that when we need so many other things. I have to prioritise Simon's wheelchair, and would like to get a bed that has a powered back rest so that he can sit up in bed whenever he wants to.

On a brighter note. Simon and I bought a huge raised planter for the back yard, it is just the right height for the wheelchair. I filled it with pea-straw and potting mix, and we sowed a load of veggies earlier in the week. In four weeks time it should be in full swing and ready for Simon's green fingers.

Am managing to survive at work - my boss and colleagues have been very forgiving.

Sorry for the lack of blogs. Time flies - so far this journey has taken nine months. I think we are still gaining ground. The same cannot be said for the Hammers - bring back Billy Bonds I say, I don't care if he's ninety....

Love Marian xx

10th March: Exhausted

2010-03-10T02:44:00.000-08:00

We are worn out, wrung out, exhausted. The BIRCH regime requires a lot of travelling (me driving) and doubled effort from Simon. Meanwhile I going to work and trying to close the sale on our house at Brighton. With luck the house will be sold and gone by Monday lunchtime. It will be a great weight off us - we have been carrying $700,000 in mortgage payments for the last four months with interest rates rising each month. I was trained in economics and taught never to be scared of large numbers, but when it is personal like this, it is not so simple. I hope that next week we will climb out of this. Phew!

I think that the Beijing trip is on for June. Anyone care to meet us there?

Marian x

26th February: 'BIRCHed'

2010-02-25T22:29:00.000-08:00

It has been some time since the Birch has been used in Australia (at least 50 years), but Simon has been well and truly 'birched' this week. By which I mean that he has been transferred to the Brain Injury Rehabilitation Care in the Home team. This, in itself, is a misnomer since he has to travel approximately 6 hours per week to the Birch gymnasium in Felixstowe. One day per week some therapists see him at our home. It is always a strain transferring between teams, but this one has really stretched us. Simon feels quite intimidated by them because they keep suggesting that he is lucky to have his place on their programme and that if he doesn't come up to scratch in anyway they will throw him off. I don't like that kind of approach, but must hold my temper because we need all the help we can get in this next challenging stage of rehabilitation.

Fortunately, Jeremy, our vision therapist is a wonder and has given Simon a real lift every time he visits us. Today, Simon got to the end of our street, back again and into the house unaided using the powered wheelchair. We are still using the chair that we borrowed from Blake and his family. We have been told again that Simon is on an endless waiting list for the chair that he really needs (he will have to sit in it all day so it must be the right size). I think that I will just have to stump up and buy it. However, in the meantime he is getting safer working with this chair and that is encouraging.

Good news is that Simon has sent a paper for publication and has another under review for an A rated journal (with Matthew GC). I felt so shamed that my own publication record was so meagre by comparison that I dashed out two conference abstracts in one day.

We said goodbye to our care assistant, Tracie, this morning. The funding for her service ran out, now we have another team taking over from tomorrow. It is such a strange way of organising things. We were so happy with Tracie and she knew our routine. Also, she liked coming to see us first thing in the morning - apparently not all clients are pleased to see their Care Assistants and can get quite abusive. Simon and I both wept when she left this morning. I now have the task of training up the new assistant(s) in our morning routine. Hope they like us.

This morning, Professor Skippy Orlando, - the renowned, erudite, and elegant chap that he is - got into a scrap with the girl cat across the road and gave her a hiding! So bad that Sally, her owner, had to take her to the vet to be patched up. This is very embarassing. Skippy, however, does not seem to have any morals and believes that beating up female cats is perfectly acceptable. What to do? I could only apologise and offer to pay the vet bill. Sally wouldn't hear of it which was very kind of her.

Congratulations to Mel on landing an excellent new job. Also to my darling Aunt Dorrie on her birthday (90+). Good on ya, Dorrie.

Love Marian x

17th February: Simon's graduation

2010-02-17T13:14:00.000-08:00

Today Simon graduated from his Rehab course at the Repatriation Hospital. Here you can see him proudly holding the certificate that he was awarded. Everyone was very pleased with the progress that Simon has made - this included taking a couple of steps using a walking stick for the first time.

Meanwhile, I am trying to fix up a trip to Beijing in June. Simon's consultant has agreed that he can travel with me providing we take some sensible precautions. It will be quite an adventure for us both.

Love Marian x

16th February: Peeling spuds

2010-02-15T23:39:00.000-08:00

Tomorrow will be Simon's last day with the rehab team at the Repatriation Hospital. They have shared our journey for around five months and it will be sad to leave them. From here we move on to work with the BIRCH (Brain Injury) team that operates out of Hampstead. They are the bees knees, and have an exciting programme planned for Simon. For this he will need to travel twice per week to Felixstowe (about 1.5 hours each way), plus some therapy at home. The need for travelling is so that Simon can use the excellent gymnasium at Felixstowe and we know from past experience that he really needs this equipment to maintain and improve his physical strength. Also, the Royal Society for the Blind has offered us around 7 weeks of intensive therapy to improve Simon's ability to scan his right field of vision. This will help him to read, but also make him a lot safer when out and about in the wheelchair (we did have a fall recently). The RSB therapist, Jeremy, is a real lively chap; Simon and I took to him immediately, he almost bounces with enthusiasm, and the positive attitude that he exudes is just what we need. Jeremy will come to visit Simon at home three times per week, and plans to build up to outdoor training within a couple of weeks. So from here on, Simon has a full schedule of rehabilitation plus commuting to cope with. He is motivated and very determined.

There have been many achievements over the past couple of weeks, especially with reading and writing. Simon has amended a paper that is now ready for publication; today he peeled a potato (in the occ therapy session); and he is racking up around 30kms per week on the exercise bike.

Today we heard from Simon's old school-friend, Stephen Pantlin. He wrote us a really lovely email - both of us were in tears... Great that you two lads are in touch again.

Sorry that I do not get to blog so often these days. Pretty busy now that I am back at work. I think (fingers crossed) that we have sold the house at Brighton. Not the best price, but enough for us to walk away from it. I guess it will take a month or so to settle while the conveyancers and bankers do whatever it is that they do.

Love Marian x

7th February: An alternative Day on the Green

2010-02-07T00:45:00.000-08:00

While most of Adelaide's music lovers rocked up to see Rob Thomas today, Simon and I spent a lazy afternoon at Red Poles listening to 'Baker Suite' a country/folk duo. The setting was exquisite: dinner in the garden under a shady umbrella, and just about the best food I have ever eaten. I have been scouting around for music venues that are accessible with the wheelchair (not many to be found, sadly).

Yesterday, I drove Simon around some of the wineries ending up at Shottesbrooke. Here we discovered that Robyn, the cellar door host, plays in a band called The Yearlings. Simon has four of their CDs. We are looking forward to catching up with their next concert in March.

Simon continues to make progress with his physio work and now regularly clocks up 10kms on the exercise bike. He did achieve 15kms in one session, but this was too much and knocked him out for most of the next day. There is movement returning in his right foot. This did happen before but the movement was involuntary and he was unaware of it. Now, he shouts 'hey hey' whenever his foot moves. This brings me dashing desperately to the rescue only to find him grinning and pointing at his foot!

I am managing to work and get most things done at home for the time being. Things will be easier once we have sold our old house at Brighton. Last week I had a nightmare with the pool cleaners. They phoned to say that they were topping the pool up with water and that I would need to turn the hose off in three hours (a 60km round-trip to turn a tap off). When I arrived, there was water running down the garden path. I found a pipe gushing everywhere, the shed three inches deep in water, and very little water in the pool. The pool cleaner had left the pump switched to 'waste' and it was rapidly emptying the contents of the pool into the shed and beyond. I was so furious that I had to wait and calm down for three hours before I could phone to complain. Fortunately, there was not much left in the shed but I know that there was a bag of cement on the floor - anyone got a jack-hammer?

Simon begins with some new therapists over the next couple of weeks. The BIRCH (Brain Injury Rehabilitation Team) come to meet us tomorrow for initial assessment. They offer therapy in the home. Later in the week we have an assessment by the Royal Institute for the Blind; they are planning some vision therapy for Simon which should help him to scan his field of vision more effectively. We continue to read together slowly. The backgammon is picking up speed (I am still winning - just).

Thanks to everyone for birthday cards and messages. Too old to count them from now on, let's just call them 'golden years'.

Love Marian xx

29th January: Simon begins reading a novel

2010-01-29T00:08:00.000-08:00

The mobile library came through McLaren Vale the other day. I popped in and asked about large print books - they had heaps of them. I scored a Robert B Parker novel 'Shrink Rap', and, knowing that Simon liked this author, I thought he might like to read it with me. This morning, Simon read the first chapter with me out loud. It was four pages, around 500 words. He made only five mistakes in the whole chapter and some of those were to do with American dialogue. We aim to read this whole book by the time the mobile library returns in four week's time. It will be a landmark in Simon's progress.

Meanwhile, Simon continues to gain strength in his right leg mainly through using our exercise bike. This has improved his knee muscles and makes standing and transferring (from the chair to bed or the car) very much easier. Today we went to a shopping centre and managed to do some normal things with only a little difficulty. I have to learn how to carry the shopping and push a wheelchair at the same time. I had piled most of the shopping on Simon's lap, had things hanging off the back of the chair, and very nearly resorted to carrying a box of soap-powder on my head but decided this was too much. There must be a knack to this.

On the way home we popped in to see Justin at Alpha Box and Dice (google them and you will know why we love them). It is just about the smallest, most rustic, most delightful cellar door that I know of. Justin came out and helped Simon to get out of the car, into the building and out again, and never stopped chattering to Simon about wine the whole time. Very different to the supermarket experience. This is the last day of my annual leave and so it will be difficult to do those kinds of trips from here on. I treasure these days together.

Love Marian xx

26th January: Australia Day

2010-01-26T14:05:00.000-08:00

Australia Day 2010 coincided with my 50th birthday - very nice for the Ozzies to arrange a national holiday for us. We had a splendid day - beginning with presents first thing in the morning. I got a wheelbarrow complete with ribbons and bows. Also a first class bottle of Shiraz with recommended cellaring for up to 18 years. It lasted until 3 o'clock!

The family joined us in the evening for drinks and a Chinese meal. We had the whole restaurant to ourselves apart from a few take-away customers. Finished off with birthday cake and Raina blew the candles out three times. During the evening my sister gave me my Dad's gold medal which was awarded to him the year I was born. A beautiful thing and I will always cherish this.

Now that I am 50 I have decided to wear red shoes!

Love Marian x

12th January: Simon's birthday

2010-01-12T12:33:00.000-08:00

Simon hit the grand age of forty seven today. I woke him at 7am to open his presents including a lovely Lacost Polo shirt from Shirley sent via the UK. It rained heavily which was very welcome, cooling the place right down. We had a quiet day while I worked on my teaching notes. In the evening we went to the Barn restaurant and had a very nice dinner. Simon had Kangaroo steak, and we both had puddings. While in the restaurant, a lady approached our table and said "Hello Simon". It turned out to be one of Simon's colleagues, Pru from Unisa, she lives nearby and was staying over in the Vale with her family. In a second coincidence it turns out that I bought my first house in Australia from her family! We have promised to keep in touch. A gentle stroll home, then watched the Number One Ladies Detective Agency (the Movie). Great stuff.

Love Marian x

11th January: Back to work

2010-01-10T21:41:00.000-08:00

Back to work for me today. Not such a bad experience, at least the air-conditioning was good. Met with our new Professor and caught up with some others to sort out timetable business. Then worked on my teaching notes for later this week. The time flew by. Worried about the risk of bush-fire, I got home by 4pm. There was a fire as I approached Noarlunga, but it seemed to be isolated - hope so. The wind has been roaring in from the North and everything is tinder dry. We hope for a storm to break this evening then we will all feel safer, not to mention cooler.

Here is a photo of Simon in his powered chair moving along at a fair click.

Love Marian x

9th January: Feeling hot, hot, hot

2010-01-08T21:27:00.000-08:00

We are having another spell of very hot weather, well over 35 degrees. So sorry to hear about the big Freeze in Europe, but maybe some of you will get to swing a few extra days off work.
Simon now has a powered wheelchair which was loaned to us by my student, Blake and his family. Many thanks to Blake, this has been a real Godsend. We are learning to use the chair which is quite intuitive, although potentially lethal in reverse! We have had a couple of runs up to the centre of the village, and enjoyed a nice meal in a restaurant that would have been inaccessible to us before. The learning curve is pretty steep - some hazard presents itself around every ten metres (Asher will know this from having pushed the manual wheelchair many miles during his stay). The main problems are: steep kerbs, potholes, inclines, overhanging branches, hedges, dog-walkers, cars and wheelie-bins parked on the pavements. Apart from that, it's a piece of cake! The chair has a potential range of 50km, although I wouldn't like to chance the battery for that distance.

I have also bought an exercise bike for Simon, he just wheels the chair up to it and pedals. It can also be used as a table-top hand bike. Most days he manages at least a kilometre with the right foot strapped to the pedal. Our rehab in the home service finished on Friday, and Simon returns to the Repat hospital for outpatient therapy from here on. He will probably attend there for two or three afternoons per week starting next Wednesday.

Other news, our house at Brighton is on the market. I had to work like stink to finish off the decorating etc, and finally we have wardrobe doors fitted (pity we don't get to use them). We need to do well on this sale, so fingers crossed.

It is Simon's birthday on 12th January, so I am looking for a nice restaurant to take him to on Tuesday evening. We are also just six months into Simon's recovery, and this feels like another milestone. We are going to set some goals for ourselves over the next few days. First up on my list is to find a holiday destination that is disabled friendly that won't break the bank. Any ideas? I'd love to get Simon into the sea somehow, and know that it is possible - I saw it happening at Benidorm in Spain (a nice peaceful resort these days, by the way).

Regarding Spike. Regrettably, he has had to move out. Our cat, Skippy, couldn't cope with him and so I was having to separate them. This meant Spike spending a lot of time in the laundry which wasn't very nice for him. Spike has moved to Mel and Pen's place around the corner - and they are currently trying to train him. This should be possible because he is only a year old. However, what the RSPCA did not tell us is that he may be crossed with a wild ferret!

Meanwhile, we are having our drive concreted. We expect this to be finished next week and this will mean that Simon can get out of the house safely and down to the level of the garden shed and lower lawn. Getting back into the house is not so straightforward, we need to adapt the ramps again. Am worried that Skippy will leave footprints all over the concrete, or maybe it will just add to the character of our home.

Back to work on Monday. I have an intensive course running for the next two weeks, also looking forward to welcoming one of our new Associate Professors, Greg Fisher. Hope he likes us!

Love Marian x

December 30th: A message from Simon

2009-12-29T19:08:00.000-08:00

This is a message that Simon wrote by himself using WordQ software:

Happy new year to all our friends, best wishes for 2010.

Love Marian and Simon XXX

PS here is our very naughty dog Spike

27th December: Season's Greetings

2009-12-26T12:42:00.000-08:00

Firstly, my apologies for the lack of xmas cards this year. I did write a batch of twenty or so, then lost them in the move. Thanks to everyone for cards and messages, we will certainly try to make the best of 2010.

Simon has been home for three weeks now. Before xmas we had visits from therapists most days, and Simon has made more progress with his speech. We are struggling a bit with physio work since we don't have the gym equipment that he used to work on. We have installed a walking rail in our living room and hope to start using that this week.

The house is still full of boxes that need unpacking, however, we have made a dent on it, and Simon is in the process of shelving his CDs in alphabetical order. We have created a beautiful music room for him which looks over the gardens. In the mornings we are treated to a wonderful display of native birds that roost in the trees behind us. Our cat, Professor Skippy Orlando, a well known ornithologist, spends much time observing these creatures from his hide in the far left corner of the garden behind the agapanthus.

We still have to finish off the house at Brighton and get it on the market. It will take a couple of weeks, then I hope it will go quickly - the bridging loan is wicked.

We have been trying to get Simon a powered wheelchair. This failed to materialise despite all the promises, it turns out that the Disability agencies have run out of funds and don't get their next allocation until July. My sister, Margaret, took up the case and went to battle with the agencies. She managed to extract an agreement that they would raid next year's funds and give Simon priority. However, this may still take several weeks. I tried to hire a powered chair before xmas but there were none available. Perhaps I'll just go in the shed and build one!

Our new dog, Spike Milligan, is a hooligan. He eats everything (except bananas), including clothes pegs, my handbag, biros, and socks. He is also a great escape artist and regularly manages to wiggle his way out of the front door. At night we have to confine him to the laundry so that the poor cat can come indoors and relax.

Hope that 2010 brings you health and happiness,

Love Marian xx

18th December: Farewell to Asher

2009-12-18T06:38:00.000-08:00

This has been a special week. Asher and Simon have been able to hang out together in the Vale visiting some favourite haunts and catching up on many stories since they last met. It has been wonderful to have our good friend here for Simon's first week at home and it was with great sadness that we said goodbye today. We will all meet again; soon I hope.

Meanwhile, we have acquired a dog. His name is Spike Milligan Shurville, a maltese cross (unspecified), just about a year old and mad as a hatter. Spike came from the RSPCA rescue centre where he had been taken in as a stray. His fur was terribly matted and about five inches thick, so they had him sheered. When we met him he looked like a little skin-head. Spike has settled in well at our new home although our cat, Skippy, is not happy about it. For the moment, we keep Spike in the laundry at night while Skippy comes indoors, then release Spike in the mornings once Skippy has gone out on patrol.

Simon has four weeks of rehab in the home underway. Almost everyday a therapist from one of the disciplines (speech, physio, occupational therapy) comes out to McLaren Vale from the Repat hospital (a long way to travel) and spends up to an hour with Simon. We also have a therapist who comes three mornings to help with showering. This team is doing really good work with Simon, his speech is particularly improved. I have learned a lot about how to transfer from bed to wheelchair to shower-chair etc. We have also successfully managed to transfer to and from the car and load the wheelchair into the boot of the car. This is difficult and heavy work and quite painful for Simon but it gives us a bit of flexibility to go out of the house.

We had some disappointing news about the funding for Simon's home assistance and his powered wheelchair. The state agency responsible for this had run out of funds (only six months into their budget) and said that we were on a hopeless waiting list. We really cannot do without the powered wheelchair, Simon would be trapped in the house on his own, he cannot manage the ramps by himself and it is dangerous in the event of fire. My sister, Margaret, got on the case today. She made repeated phone calls to various state agencies insisting that Simon should have priority for funding. After much perserverance, she got them to agree to raid next year's budget (six months ahead) to fund Simon's wheelchair. It might still take several weeks, but we think that this will happen. When Simon heard this news he insisted that we jump in the car and go to see Margaret to thank her in person. Which we did. We found her at the plumbing shop where a number had gathered for the staff/customer/hangers on xmas barbecue. This was a lovely way to end our day. Here are some pictures of Simon and Gerry in the plumbing shop warehouse, and Raina (aged three) with her daddy driving the fork-lift!

Pictures of Spike to follow....

Love Marian x

12th December: A day out in the Vale

2009-12-11T21:20:00.000-08:00

Simon was discharged from hospital on Tuesday 8th December after just over five months. It was wonderful, emotional, and terrifying all at once. We arrived at our new home in McLaren Vale which is in a chaotic state, full of removal boxes. But it was just splendid to be able to close our front door and know that we were home to stay. Asher arrived later on Tuesday having spent 27 hours in transit. He managed to stay awake while we went to the Barn for dinner. It was a great day.

Asher and Simon have been out on some long walks around the Vale, visiting various cafes and wine bars. They have found some really good places and are making friends wherever they go. This picture shows Asher doing a pile of ironing, while Simon sports his new hair-cut and Akubra hat.

Saturday we went to Willunga for the farmers' market and had a big shopping spree - loads of free-range goodies. Simon is managing to get in and out of the car very well, although it is quite an effort so we limit the number of transfers as best we can. Later I drove up to Samuel's Gorge - one of Simon's favourite wineries, then back down the hill via a fantastic new cellar door: Alpha, Box and Dice. We hosted Margaret and Gerry for drinks in the afternoon, then Mel and Pen for dinner.

6th December: 5 months in

2009-12-06T01:26:00.000-08:00

Tomorrow Simon will have spent five months in hospital. He has decided it is enough and, ready or not, he is coming home. We move house tomorrow (Monday) and Simon comes home Tuesday lunchtime. We have been packing like fury, but still not finished. I have managed to clear everything out of the furniture that needs shifting, and got all the fragile Hi-Fi and TV stuff into their original boxes. The rest will have to go in car trips.

Tomorrow I face around 150kms on the road plus supervising the move at either end. I wish I had Simon to help.

My sister, Margaret, rocked up today and took away a car-load of stuff. Not sure how she managed to unload it by herself the other end, but she did it. Good on you Margaret. One of these days she will really retire.

The house is not really ready but sufficient to get started. I spent Friday night/saturday morning painting with a five hour break for sleep. While this is exhausting, I feel exhilirated by this challenge and this great breakthrough. It was my great ambition to bring Simon home. If all goes well, it will be very much ahead of schedule. I could not bear to see him spend any more time in hospital, even criminals don't get that long.

Now our lives will change. I become a full-time carer as well as having a full-time job. Wonder when I will get to relax? Maybe never....

We have been told that we cannot have any care assistance at home. I thought this had all been sorted out. Never mind, we will cope.

This will be my last post for a few days. We have to switch broadband providers. You know what that means - at least three hours a day waiting on hold while they transfer you to a help-desk in the whoop-whoop!

1st December: Raina's birthday

2009-11-30T22:51:00.000-08:00

Raina is three years old today, she is so excited. At the weekend, she had a party with about 25 other kids at an animal farm. They were allowed to get up close and play with guinea pigs, rabbits, donkeys etc. Raina would select a guinea-pig and stroke it, then spotting a prettier one, would fling it away and reach for the next one. Thankfully, these guinea pigs get a lot of love and don't mind the rejection!

I wrote my usual bedtime story for her birthday, still working on the xmas version.

Big news happening here. We physically move into our new house on Monday, Asher arrives on Tuesday afternoon, and Simon gets discharged from rehab on Tuesday evening! It will be five months and two days since his stroke, almost all of that time in hospital. We cannot wait to get him home and comfortable.

Disability SA are arranging for me to have care help in the mornings and evenings, although that may not happen for a week or so. No matter, Simon and I have managed here at Brighton with no bathroom at weekends. It has been hard but we have been happy at home.

The modifications to the new house now have a rapid deadline. I hope that we can make it, if not, we will just have to improvise.

I went to our staff xmas do today. It was held at a bowling/tennis club. Very long drive to get there way East of the City in the Adelaide foothills. I tried my hand at bowls and must declare myself completely incompetent. I thank my bowling partner, Damien, for putting up with me. We lost by a glorious margin to Phil and Ludek (both accountants). I did claim to be much better at darts, but hope that nobody takes me up on that.

Love Marian x

29th November:

2009-11-29T03:50:00.000-08:00

This photo was taken a few days ago at our new house. We plan great things for the back yard.

We had a good weekend. Simon helped with packing CDs while I did the gardening. We saw our neighbour, Jan, and chilled out.

Very tired but happy. Nice result for the Hammers.

Marian x

27th November: hopitty-hop

2009-11-27T02:22:00.000-08:00

Off to work early this morning, mainly to collect stuff for my negotiation course and sort out some admin. Had an interesting experience in the car-park, a colleague had left her handbrake off and her car had glided across the car-park leaving everyone scratching their heads - why would someone park a car like that? All quickly sorted.
Then off to McLaren Vale where I found Gerry has made amazing progress - new doors created, others widened. I couldn't believe how much had been done, and I am so grateful to him. At this rate, we are certainly on target to have Simon in the new house in two weeks' time. I painted a wall in the lounge. Meanwhile, Rachael and Raina (aged three next week came to visit). Raina is very good at hopping on her right leg and proceeded to hop all around the house. When asked if she could hop on her left leg, Raina said "I'm not sure", tried it, and fell flat on her face! Without injury, I might add, rather like her mother who survived being catapulted 2 metres from a push-chair at 18 months (while in the care of 'young auntie Marian'!).
Many thanks to Margaret who took the lunch session with Simon, (have found a way of ordering him double fish and chips on Fridays). I went up for supper with Sausages, beans and baked spuds. I usually eat my lunch and dinner with Simon now and have got quite used to eating at hospital hours (12noon and 5pm). Simon had at least two physio sessions today, and there was more to come. The physio students are currently on work placement, and they like to get all the experience that they can (and are very competitive amongst themselves), so Simon is benefitting from this. He also benefits from their refreshing attitude to their work - they are not worn down, they have energy and enthusiasm, and seem to be well trained and educated. It is not surprising that so many Ozzies get physio posts in the UK.
I have drawn up a plan of Simon's music room using MSoft Visio and am hoping that he can tell me how to place things in the room. I need to be certain about this because I have to instruct an electrician on Monday about where to place power-points etc. The last time I did this I made many mistakes, really I am hopeless at interior layout and decorating (apart from painting). When it is finished, I hope that Simon will have a magnificent music room worthy of his collection. The music room looks out over the garden, and perhaps we can get him some French doors directly onto the patio.
I have felt a little stressed in recent weeks but this is easing now. I plan to go fishing in the evenings, no plans to catch anything, just a peaceful thing to do.
Love Marian x

25th November: One month til xmas

2009-11-25T00:50:00.000-08:00

Only one month 'til xmas, don't panic! Actually, my family in Oz have come up with a great scheme whereby we buy one present, anonymously, for another family member whose name is drawn randomly. We are only allowed to spend fifty dollars maximum. For overseas presents I am relying on Amazon and finding them very good - they gift wrap and deliver, completely painless. Just as well since when I tried to get into the Marion shopping mall today I was beaten back by the weight of traffic in the carpark.

Gerry has been working at our new house and reports good progress. The plumber has also been in and got started. Meanwhile, at Brighton, I have finally ordered some wardrobe doors (after nearly two years). This will upset Skippy who likes to 'hide' in our open wardrobe.
Tried to get ahead with some teaching preparation today, I have an intensive course running in January, and need to get it all in press before the xmas break.
Simon's ward had an outdoor barbecue today. The courtyard was packed with wheelchairs, nobody could move, it was like fairground dodgems crossed with a chimpanzees' tea party. Some of the patients with less coordination were flinging sausages and salad all over the place. Simon does not like crowds and is averse to having coleslaw in his ears, so we retreated to his room to eat. They made a good effort with the barbecue grub. This evening I took him a shepherd's pie. His hospital menu was crazy again, and I have found that 30% of the time he is given completely the wrong meal. I know that this is not Simon's fault because I fill out his menus mostly, and never in my maddest moment would I order cream of parsnip soup for him! For those who think that cream of parsnip soup may sound nice - it isn't, I tasted it and it was evil. Tomorrow I cannot be there at lunchtime, so I will have to take something decent in the evening to cheer him up. Simon gets another swim tomorrow.

There was another misunderstanding today about Simon's wheelchair. Twice I was phoned by the hospital asking a) where is Simon? and b) where is his wheelchair? I must say I found both questions rather disturbing! It transpires that a technician was trying to repair the new manual wheelchair that has been issued to Simon. The fact that it is broken is the reason why he was not to be found sitting in it! Nevertheless, the technician proceeded to try to repair the chair that Simon was sitting in. We got there in the end, but on the other end of the phone it was like participating in one of those fiendish communication exercises.

Mel and Pen took delivery of their car today. It is a little bit better than a 'bomb' (you poms would say 'a banger'), and I think it will run for three or four years. Cars have less problems in Oz than in England where you used to hear cars wheezing and groaning to start in the damp weather, then a pile of expletives as it flooded with fuel and the poor owner tramped off to get the bus in the pouring rain. My transport of choice in England was a bicycle or Shanks' pony - always reliable.

Thanks to Malcolm for phoning and having a long chat with Simon. We are looking forward to seeing you and Jelina, and I think you will be blown away by the progress that Simon has made since you last met. If Moira (from UniSA) is reading, I am going to need some big strong guys to help with our removals. Simon believes that you know some chaps who would do a couple of days for us. If so, can you get in touch please?

Love Marian x

23rd November: Packing and Painting

2009-11-22T13:44:00.000-08:00

Got Simon home again for the weekend. Unfortunately I forgot to pick up his shower chair so we had to improvise again. Thankfully all went well. Simon was quite exhausted on Saturday and snoozed most of the day while I pottered in the garden. We picked out lots of good tunes, my favourite this week was Shelby Lynne; she sings like an angel. Sunday we had some more rain and this kept us indoors for much of the day. Simon decided to start packing up his CDs and DVDs (there are many thousands). He has packed five boxes, so I can begin shifting those up to the new house. The sun came out finally, and I managed to get a coat of paint on the side of the shed. Simon wanted to help me but I couldn't squeeze his wheelchair past the pool fence. Next weekend we will have a go at painting the front gates, he can reach those easily. It was good to see Simon active, he also helped to prepare some dinner - he chops vegetables and lays the table. He also dictated some email replies, and is getting much better at using the mouse and keyboard.

Today's pic is of Simon by the pool with his beloved pot plants.

Love Marian x

20th November: Beautiful rain

2009-11-19T23:39:00.000-08:00

On reflection, I realise that I am inconsistent in my views about Australian weather. One day I complain that it is 'raining cats and dogs', next describe a 43 degree day and drought, and tonight I welcome this refreshing shower of warm rain. OK, I am originally English, and so observing the weather is a national characteristic. I must learn to put this away and take an Ozzie attitude to weather - rain is good, sun is good in moderation, save all the water that you can get - that is all there is to it. Have left my car out in the open so that it gets a good wash. I learned this by observing the behaviour of my neighbours.
Picked Simon up from rehab before 9am and drove in the taxi to McLaren Vale. We were expecting a guy from Telstra to connect the TV service - big cock-up by Telstra and no show. When I phoned them later (one hour with the call-centre) they agreed that they could do all of the work that they promised by December 2nd. Very quick to take your money, not so quick to deliver. Some of you may be reminded of British Telecom in their monopoly days.
My sister, Margaret, was run ragged all day with our comings and goings, even picked up our lunch and delivered it. Gerry spent time with our occupational therapist to understand the modifications required. Gerry took the bathroom door off, and managed to fit the shower chair in. Our occupational therapist advised us on what modifications are needed urgently and we will get onto that straight away. I took another door off in the hallway (it was an unecessary door) and Simon now has a clear run from the front door into the kitchen, back room, and front room. Some more door widening to do, but it does not look onerous. If anyone is in the market for some spare doors, sing up.
Sorry there are no photos. Our occupational therapist took them on her camera and will email those later. We took up half of her day with our home visit and I think that she was very patient with us. I would also like to acknowledge the cooperation of our new neighbours, Margaret and Mike, who, within twenty minutes of meeting us, lent us their screwdrivers! Good on ya, guys.

Marian x

19th November: Melting

2009-11-19T00:35:00.000-08:00

Over 40 degrees today in Adelaide, everyone is nearly melting including the cat (who now spends most of the day shade hugging in the garden). However, nice and cool at work in the aircon. Had a successful day interviewing for new staff (I hope), then dashed home to pick up a television and drove with it to McLaren Vale. I stuffed it in the back of the car with a couple of duvets and pillows and hoped for the best. Managed to get it there in one piece. I needed to do this because the Telstra people are coming in the morning, and I think they may be installing the Foxtel as well, so we needed a TV there to test the service. Quick cuppa with Margaret then dashed back to rehab making it with minutes to spare. We had toasted sandwiches for tea.
Simon had a good day. He was in a 'reading group' this morning and seemed very pleased with that. Swimming this afternoon, and a visit from Chris Stewart (thanks Chris also for the copy of Viz - haven't seen that in years).
We are taking Simon to McLaren Vale first thing tomorrow to walk through the new house with the Occupational Therapist. Another overnighter planned for Saturday and Sunday at Brighton. I checked the bank accounts and discovered that we only owe $650,000 - small change.... (gulp).
Margaret had the bright idea of putting in an above ground pool at the new house, level with the rear patio. If this is feasible, it will chop a lot off our renovation costs at the new house. I will ask our pool man to come up with some suggestions. Simon and I also talked about stripping down one of his bicycles to make an exercise machine that he can use sitting in the chair. They have one of these in the rehab unit and it is well used.
Home to the news that we are expecting two days of rain - much needed for our poor lawns.
Piccies tomorrow,
Love Marian x

18th November: New Home

2009-11-17T15:33:00.000-08:00

We successfully completed on our new home in McLaren Vale yesterday, I went up to collect the keys in the afternoon and took a car-load of stuff to begin the moving process. All looks good, everything left clean and tidy, and no obvious problems. There is a bit of over-painting to do, there are some very bold colours in a couple of the rooms. My preference is for quiet, gentle colours. Gerry is going in to the house this morning to begin dismantling the shower screen. We will take Simon up on Friday with his occupational therapist, and we plan to do a walk through to work out what modifications are needed urgently. We will stop for lunch in the Vale.
I stayed over with Mel and Pen last night, their place is looking really good now. Drove Mel to work during the peak hour traffic - not nice, I plan to try to hit the roads at quieter times or take the slower road. The expressway takes about 15 minutes off the journey, but I fear that the stress may take years off my life.
Skippy is cross with me (showing me his dot) because I had to leave him outside last night (I left the shed slightly open and I know full well that he spent a comfortable night in there because there was a cat-shaped indentation in a sleeping bag and all of the food and biscuits had been eaten). However, Skippy prefers the comfort of a double bed, duvet and several pillows plus the option to wake me up in the middle of the night to attend to his every need. Why am I so soft with this cat? Will take some photos of the new house on Friday.
BTW I had some technical trouble with the blog. To fix it I had to set my internet privacy and security settings to medium. Perhaps the IT nerds out there would advise me about the implications of this, and can it be avoided?
All good,

Love Marian x

15th November: Long hot days, many spiders

2009-11-15T01:11:00.000-08:00

Simon's rehab routine continues as normal. He is making good progress in physio and there is probably more improvement to come there. At home, he has been trying to use the computer. He can now type most of his username without assistance, and he dictates messages to send to people. Some of these are a bit odd, but I faithfully transcribe them, and the recipients seem to appreciate the effort.

I must confess that I got fed up with Facebook and deregistered. What on earth is this 'farming' business about? and how do they find the time to spend half the day on the internet with this garbage? Sorry guys, I just think this is wasteful and expensive and ruining. Forget Facebook and X-Factor, read a good book, go to live concerts, grow roses, make love, travel if you can; then write about it to your friends . Rant over. Facebook dead....

Mel and Pen popped in this afternoon. They had a good old chat with Simon made him laugh a lot. Mostly about fart jokes but they are always good value.

Love Marian x

12th November: Heatwave

2009-11-12T00:54:00.000-08:00

We are in an official heatwave, several days over 35 degrees, and set to reach 40 by Sunday. Unlike Southern Europe, Australia doesn't slow down, just ploughs on at the same pace. Beautiful in the evenings however, and just perfect for walks along the beach. The pool was as warm as bath water this evening.

Took fish and chips for Simon this evening, his dinners have been messed up badly this week. Can't wait to get him home so that he can choose what to eat and when. All is looking good on the new house, the settlement date is in just five days if all goes to plan.

Love Marian x

10th November: Kitchen madness

2009-11-10T01:23:00.000-08:00

I joined Simon for lunch and dinner, only to find that his main course was missing on both occasions, and the desserts had been replaced with soup! It has been a very hot day, and I guess it is even hotter in the hospital kitchens. They could be forgiven for making mistakes in those conditions, although I do wonder whether the kitchen porters ate all the ice-creams! Fortunately, I was able to source some decent food from outside. Otherwise spent the day marking and sun-dodging. Home to water the garden, the plants were so thirsty I could hear them giggling afterwards. Then a welcome dip in the pool for me, it was like stepping into a tepid bath, just gorgeous. I may have another splash before bedtime.

Henry, the broker, rang to say that our forms have been accepted by the bank, and we just wait now for the Land Registry to give us approval. Simon's occupational therapist is going to arrange a visit to our new house with Simon as soon as we get the keys. She will be able to tell us what modifications are absolutely necessary before he can come home. This will be a great help. Really looking forward to getting settled. Simon has picked out his wide-screen TV (50 inches!).

All good, love Marian x

9th November: Sizzling in Adelaide

2009-11-09T02:42:00.000-08:00

We are having a big heatwave - expecting 37+ degrees for the next two days. I am battling to save plants and the lawn (which I had only just rescued from last year). Have enjoyed swimming in the pool, just wish that Simon could get in there with me. Simon got in the pool at rehab for his hydrotherapy session today, and he did enjoy it. He looked particularly handsome in a Hawaiian style beach shirt this morning, everyone was complementing him on it. I will see if I can get him some lighter gear now that it is warming up.
Our mortgage broker came to the hospital to meet Simon today and to take his signature on a number of documents. The broker, Henry, was worried that Simon's signature is inconsistent and might not be accepted by the Land Registry. I thought this was a bit silly really, we have to ID ourselves dozens of times in this house-buying process, and it can't be the first time that a stroke victim has bought a property. Anyway, he could sign it with his thumbprint and deposit some DNA if they were really concerned about it. While Henry was obsessed with this detail, in passing, he mentioned to me that I would owe around $700,000 in two weeks time. "Don't worry" said Henry.... I am quietly frantic and keep finding myself humming that tune by the Valentino Brothers!
Worked on a draft of a student's Masters dissertation today - I am hoping that she can make all of the amendments that I have suggested overnight because it is due in tomorrow and she leaves for India on Thursday. As always, I have selected a very serious examiner for her (because I believe this adds value to the work and the student), and as always, I will spend the next fortnight worrying about it. My student is going back to India for a Hindi family wedding. I once had the privelege of attending one of the five ceremonies at a Hindu wedding - it was just spectacular. I was dressed to the nines but have never felt so under-dressed!
My neighbour, Jan, went xmas shopping at the weekend. I felt a sudden panic, then realised that xmas is a good six weeks away. Simon and I read the catalogue from the Reject Shop and decided that we would get all of our family xmas presents from there. They are unbelievably naff, but we know that you will treasure them!
Love Marian xx

8th November: Simon's first blog post

2009-11-07T03:01:00.000-08:00

Sprang Simon from Rehab at midday, and straight home for lunch. It was a glorious day and we spent the afternoon under the verandah. I combined this with ironing and swimming while Simon had the occasional snooze. It turns out that I don't mind doing the ironing outdoors. We picked some nice tunes, my favourite this afternoon was an old collection by the Pretenders. Also discovered a small treasure: the original of "Money's too tight (to mention)" which I had always attributed to Simply Red. Not so. It was the Valentino Brothers and their version is just superb. Get downloading....
Mel phoned this afternoon, she has managed to sell our car (the Camry), well done, Mel. Another talent to add to your list.
Simon is happily esconced in his recliner watching Rockwiz - he knows all the answers before they have finished the question! Today he managed to find his way to this blog and has made his first posting! Scroll down a few days and you will find his message.
Thanks for messages from David McGladdery and Pernille, he really loves to hear from you.

Love Marian x

6th November: Koala on Campus

2009-11-06T00:10:00.000-08:00

Just back from my second visit to Simon today. Unfortunately, he missed out on his swim again. I could not get at the reason why and the day shift staff had gone off duty. I wish they would stop messing him around, it just upsets and confuses him. The good news is that we have a tentative date for settlement on our new house: 17th November. I can't be absolutely certain of that, but it should be thereabouts. This means we will have a couple of weeks to get in and do the urgent modifications and may be able to get Simon home by early December when Asher arrives.

Knocked out two more syllabuses today, and thought I had finished, only to find another one incubating in my inbox when I got home. Also found this wonderful notice from the Social Science Administration team:

"A male koala has regularly been seen on campus, especially around the Social Sciences north and south buildings. Many staff and students have provided water for him during heat waves when he tends to come into our courtyards. Several staff have contacted Cleland Wildlife Park enquiring about the behaviour of the koala and as a consequence of these enquiries, a vet is willing to come on campus, hopefully locate the koala and examine it to establish if there are any medical issues. This animal is not dangerous or aggressive and because it appears to be quite thirsty, it will follow anyone who is in possession of a water bottle. You are to exercise precaution but the little guy only wants a drink and will be pleased if you can provide it (and dispose of your water bottle afterwards). He will try to hold the bottle in his claws so be mindful of this to avoid any scratches. Water is a very important commodity for the survival of the koala so please help where you can."

Flinders is special. This year we are having our xmas outing to Kensington Bowling and Tennis Club. I plan to try my hand at bowls.

Warm weekend approaching - shorts alert!

Love Marian xx

November 5th: Melbourne Cup week

2009-11-05T00:20:00.000-08:00

Sorry for the lack of blogging this week, been busy and a bit tired in the evenings. Simon had his first dip in the pool at last on Wednesday - he complained that the physios didn't let him have any fun, they made him work the whole session! He gets another swim on Friday. They have worked him very hard this week. One reward, he got third place in the rehab sweepstake on the Melbourne Cup netting a whopping $6. I didn't manage to get a bet on, but would have lost anyway. Melbourne Cup day coincides with my arrival as a migrant in Australia - it has been an eventful four years.

Meanwhile I've been getting the marking done, dealing with research students, and syllabus writing.

There is a technician coming to our house in the morning to try to raise the height of our bed. At present it is a bit low for transferring to and from the wheelchair and I have kittens every time Simon attempts this. Fortunately, last weekend all went reasonably well. However, it will be nice to have the comfort of a level transfer. We would really like one of those whizz bang beds that goes up and down and raises the backrest etc.

Thanks to Blake for the advice re computer software. I had a look at this and realised that Simon's speech would not be consistent enough for voice recognition just now, but while on that search I discovered a site, Technical Solutions Australia, that does electronics for the disabled, they have a catalogue of neat stuff including touch screen and 'read back' kit (boasting an application that does genuine Ozzie accents!). I love the idea of a computer that says "Don't come the raw prawn with me, ya Dingo!". I have emailed them to ask for advice.

Caught up with my sister, Margaret, briefly on Wednesday. She had a nice holiday in Queensland, but already feels like she needs another one. She is always buzzing about helping someone. No rest for the 'retired'.

We are expecting nice weather for the weekend. Simon will come home overnight Saturday to Sunday. This time I aim to be better prepared.

Thanks for the phone call from Nick, your message got through loud and clear. Also thanks to Shirley for the postcards that we all received this week.

Love Marian xx

2nd November: marking my socks off

2009-11-02T00:24:00.000-08:00

Have spent much of today marking. Not a bad job, and I really enjoy reading some of the students' work, especially the reflective stuff. Happily, most of those I marked today got over the standard, and some by a long margin which is very pleasing.

Dropped in to see Simon at lunchtime, he was in a physio session, and all is going well there. I was, of course, quizzed about our weekend at home. We made it, not easily, but at least I know this is achievable even with the minimum facilities and equipment. I could do with two sets of eyes and hands and a lesser weight disadvantage. We are both working on the latter.

Thanks for the message from Nick B today. Simon was still in physio, but the nurse wrote down exactly what you said. Good on ya, Nick.

We have plunged from 33 degrees to 16 degrees in the last hour. What a strange climate this is. However, we are grateful for the rain which may just save the lawn.

Today's picture is of Simon and our neighbour, Jan. Guess what guys, she is available! Get posting....

Love, Marian x

1st November: Long weekend

2009-11-01T01:01:00.000-07:00

I managed to spring Simon from Rehab on Friday evening, and we have spent two whole days and nights together. This was fantastic, although I will not pretend that it was easy. We don't have an accessible bathroom at this house which makes life very difficult. We improvised quite well, and Simon has returned to rehab this evening in good shape. It was good to wake up together and just be able to potter around in the morning. Lazy breakfasts on the patio, and no hurry to get on the road which is our usual story on Saturdays and Sundays. Our neighbour, Jan, came over on Saturday afternoon, we cooked up some burgers and snags with some salad. This evening we had tender roast lamb with rosemary, roast spuds and three veg. Very good to see Simon eating his veggies.

We had to do a bit of sun-dodging this weekend, temperature over 30 and some wicked UV rays. I dipped in the pool several times today to cool off, but never in front of Simon - I so wish he could get in the pool with me. I know it can be done, but it will take four strong lads.

Simon spent a lot of time listening to his music, we raided the music room several times for long forgotten CDs. My pick was Prince "The Hits 1" album - that took us back to our youth, and we were dancing.

I mowed the lawn today and fear that I have already lost the battle. With just one week of hot, dry weather it has started to turn brown. I have raked and forked it, and plan to get some water on it this evening, but I fear it is not going to flourish. We have had so much rain here, but it never seems to be enough, I guess the ground water is low. At the new house we have a massive rainwater tank, it is almost the size of an apartment that I once lived in. That should help with Si's gardening plans.

Feeling good,

Love Marian xx

30th October: Home early

2009-10-30T03:00:00.000-07:00

Arrived before 9am for Simon's swimming session, only to find him outside very dejected. It had been cancelled. I went in to investigate. There had been a burst water main and most of the hospital was without water. Disastrous, they couldn't even flush the loos. Margaret joined me and we took Simon for a cuppa and tried to cheer him up. This was hard, he had been so looking forward to his swim today.
I went off to work but couldn't keep my mind on anything and it was very hot today. So I went home thinking I'll have a dip in the pool, cool off and try again. I rang the Rehab, still no water and they were considering evacuating. I decided that was enough and said I would like to take him home, they agreed, and here we are. I didn't get my dip in the pool, but maybe tomorrow when Simon isn't looking.

I managed to 'shower' Simon in a chair in the garden using a watering can of warm water ( I have to stand on a foot stool to get the height). Anyone looking over the fence would have thought this very bizarre but it was the only way I could think of. Well it worked, he is fresh and clean which he wasn't when I picked him up. I pity anyone staying on Rehab this weekend, nobody has showered or washed all day. We had a nice meal sitting on the patio. Now Simon is resting in his favourite chair with the TV and his beloved cat. So far we have managed several 'transfers' from the wheelchair without difficulty. Fingers crossed. This weekend we plan nothing more adventurous than eating on the patio and lolling around the house. Life is just as it should be.

Love Marian x

29th October: Who burnt the toast?

2009-10-29T01:35:00.000-07:00

Started my marking at 6am while it was cool and quiet, managed to get finished by 11am, in time to visit Simon for lunchtime. He was narked about something to do with the morning toast - perhaps it was burnt. Small things like that can really put your day out - I can remember being in hospital once and the orderly declaring that there was no time to make toast and we would all have to go without. We were outraged, protests were organised and one patient raised a petition to be sent to the Secretary of State. It was all over by tea-time.

Simon's diabetes nurse came to give me training on how to use the blood glucose meter and the insulin pen - I've been using these things daily for about two years, but didn't like to interrupt so listened patiently. Simon was grinning.

I think that we have approval for overnight leave this weekend. Whoopee! It will be over 30 degrees and very hot on Sunday - hope that our air conditioner still works after the winter break. We have had some beautiful days this week high 20s / low 30s just perfect (except for having to work).

Simon gets his first dip in the hydrotherapy pool tomorrow morning. I plan to get there early to witness this - it will be great to see him in the water again.

Just when I thought the marking was finished, some more came along. Interesting stuff though, two honours theses on lively topics.

All seems to be proceeding well with the house, the Oz system seems to be fairly straightforward so long as you pay people to do all the leg work, it is mostly a matter of signing lots of documents. Shirley had a more difficult experience in Tunisia where they use an archaic French system. They can actually hold up a transaction for failure to pay 1 Dinar (50 pence?) for the rubbish collection.

Some of you have had phone calls from Simon but couldn't work out who it was. If you get an odd call, it might just be Simon. I know that he phoned Aiden, we had a text from him sounding confused.

Love Marian x

28th October: 22 Steps

2009-10-28T01:39:00.000-07:00

Good sleep, then out early to catch Simon's physio session. Watched him transferring independently from the bed to chair etc. He is really strong now and manages without assistance. It is likely that we will get permission for overnight leave this weekend. The second part of the physio session was in the gym where I watched Simon take 22 steps in two series. He only needs a brace on the lower leg to keep the ankle straight. Simon is managing to do this even though he has no feeling in the lower leg.
I left him to his own devices at lunchtime while they had a ward BBQ. Simon managed to get second helpings again. Home to bash out some marking - nearly finished, then had a cool dip in the pool.
Found Simon waiting for me at the door this evening, I brought take-away and he was starving after all the physio sessions. Great news, he is to be allowed to use the hydrotherapy pool this Friday, and if all goes well, he gets to swim twice a week from then on. He will be so happy, he loves the water. I will try to get to the swimming session on Friday morning, I want to see how they get him in and out of the pool.

Thanks for cards from Miranda, and Margaret & Gerry. I think Simon has also taken some phone calls, he loves to talk.
All good,

Love Marian x

27th October: ZZZZZ

2009-10-27T02:24:00.001-07:00

So very tired, I must just sleep. Night night.

M x

26th October: Technical problems

2009-10-26T00:21:00.000-07:00

Sorry for the lack of blog these last few days, I have had some technical problems (thanks to Microsoft). I defragmented the disk overnight (always a worrying process) and seem to have made a bit more space, but no question I have to find a better computer. I will try to find one that is friendly for Simon, big screen and joystick. Perhaps even touch screen if such exists. I really need advice on this, get busy posting comments guys.

So what has happened. Simon came home for Saturday and Sunday afternoon, we now stay out until 7pm. We are going to be trained on transfers (to beds, chairs, loos, cars etc) on Wednesday by the physios. There is a plan to let us have an overnighter at home next weekend if all goes well in the practice sessions. This would be such a bonus for us. I also realise that it is a test for me (set by the rehab staff). Can Marian cope on her own? I think I can. Have discovered that there are some things that I do need: more ramps, a baby intercom thing (so that I don't have to grow eyes in the back of my head), a tazer gun for very bad taxi drivers, and a 27 hour day. Some of those can be fixed.

I received automated confirmation from the HR database that I had successfully passed my two year probation period and that I am confirmed as a permanent member of staff until December 2049 - I will be getting close to my 90th birthday by then! I have heard of the ageing workforce but that is ridiculous. It made me smile.

Marking heavily at the moment. I try to be forgiving, and remember what it was like to be a first year student. There are some that just cannot be rescued, but in most cases I have been able to wave the magic pass wand. More star-chamber stuff. Early indications are that our reflective journal exercise has been successful - thank you, God.

Simon continues to work hard in the gym, and is making progress with his leg. The arm is not making progress, and he asked me (not for the first time) if he could have it amputated. NO. A totally irreversible and dangerous procedure. I don't blame Simon for asking and I know what the scriptures say about this. However, the fact that he has pain in his hand is encouraging. Hard as it is to bear, where there is pain there is life.

I know that colleagues at UniSa are preoccupied with their own problems just now, but I would ask you to stay in contact with Simon. You can telephone him at the Repat 8275 1920, Bed 8, and you can certainly pass by and see us at our home in South Brighton at weekends. We are in the phone book. He has been worrying about the lack of contact with you all. Please stand by him guys, I know he would do it for you. I predict that he will be back at work in some way in two years time.

Fair result for the Hammers against a top Arsenal side, if only the defence wasn't so flimsy. Personally I think the goalkeeper needs to gain weight - wider is better in goal, surely.
Hope this post makes it.

Marian x

22nd October: Shopping trip

2009-10-22T02:37:00.000-07:00

Into work early and split up some marking with Raj, commented on some papers, then left my office in a dreadful mess. Decided just to shut the door on it and go back tomorrow with a shovel and a large wheelie bin. Time for a real clear out. Set off to rehab for Simon's lunch. He had been in the gym, and they are reporting very distinct movement in his right thigh, so now it has recovered below the hip. As luck would have it a team of physio students have just arrived on placement at the hospital and are really keen, so Simon is getting extra physio sessions most days. I had arranged to take Simon to Marion Shopping Centre to see the optometrist leaving at 4.30pm. Decided that there was no reason to go back to work, just found a quiet shady garden and got on with my marking for the afternoon. This was remarkably productive, nothing but birdsong and the odd spider to interrupt my thoughts. In fact, I got so much done that I am thinking of setting up a temporary office in the Repat grounds. If anyone is looking for me, I am to be found under the furthest tree on the left behind Rheumatology.
Went back to collect Simon from his ward for the taxi to Marion. The scoundrels let us down badly, almost half an hour late, then the driver started to mess about adding several kilometres to the route. I was quite annoyed with him. Got Simon to the optometrist just on time, this was a good experience. The doctor remembered Simon from his last visit but took the new situation completely in his stride "See you've got some wheels there Simon!". We explained what had happened and he gave us a very detailed explanation of what has been happening to Simon's eyesight. The good news is that he said very positive things about the eyesight returning to near normal after around six months, and that Simon was showing signs of improvement already. He didn't even recommend changing the prescription on the glasses. Simon was really pleased with this news.
From there we hit the shopping centre food court - these are always good value in Australia. He selected a Yiros stall, and we had quite a healthy meal - plenty of salad.
With just a little time left we had a tour around Myers TV and Hi-Fi section where Simon drooled over the wide-screen plasmas. We already have two of these, but that will never be enough.... I have promised him Foxtel when we move to the new house, so I suppose a very good home-movie system wouldn't be a bad idea. Listen to me, falling for this already. From there to JB Hi-Fi where we found a bunch of DVDs that Simon wanted including the first series of the Wire, we have the rest, so now he can begin watching that. His pick for this evening was a series of Stargate Atlantis.
We had intended to do more shopping - smaller clothes needed as he is shrinking quite rapidly. So another shopping trip on the cards next Thursday.
Good taxi ride back to the hospital, and left Simon getting into bed tired but happy with his day. Rushed home to let Skippy out - think he had been crossing his legs for a couple of hours.
We had quite a long chat with the Professor (Simon's consultant) this afternoon. She is a real card and I like her a lot. Simon was negotiating his release date - he is prepared to compromise on six weeks when Asher gets here. She said maybe, but definitely by xmas. Also she was going to try to get Simon some access to the hydrotherapy pool. We asked whether we could use our private insurance in some way. The answer is again, maybe. However, she was very interested that we had private insurance, and with the best company, because it will ensure continued rehab treatment for Simon in the future. While outpatient appointments are limited and not covered by insurance, she can arrange to admit Simon to the hospital for a week at a time for intensive rehab. With this prospect she thought it possible that we could release Simon earlier rather than later. The problem with early release is that it effectively ends the intensive rehab period and, under the public system, it is difficult to restart it unless you have a major incident. This was all very interesting advice. I had wondered why we were paying for all this health insurance, now it seems to have been worth it. I did worry about the prospect of having to admit Simon to the hospital for a week at a time, but it seems it isn't really like that, he can come home at night and that will be easy for me because I work just ten minutes away and can drop and pick him up on my way.
Next Wednesday we have an appointment with the physios to show me how to transfer Simon to and from chairs, beds etc. The truth is, Simon and I have already achieved these things - I admit, awkwardly. It will be good to know the correct way so that we take less risks. Today I found a wheelie shower chair, whoopee cushion, and a 'grabber stick' under my carport - all delivered courtesy of the SA government. I am impressed and grateful.
In all, a busy and interesting day. Thanks for the advice about dogs and cats. It is obvious that dogs are more of a threat to cats than cats are to dogs, but cats are a bit cleverer and have a better sense of self preservation. Then dogs are more loyal and friendly than cats. Oh dear, too difficult. Think I'll get Asher to talk this one over with Simon - he knows about the practicalities of dog management (HND Furry Things, BSc (Animal Behaviour and Dog Mngt), Phd: The application of Pavlovian theory of slaverring dogs to cat behaviour in rural Australia (Fleurieu Peninsula).
Love Marian x
PS can't get photos to work here any more, it tries to blow up my machine at every attempt. Blasted Microsoft downloads are the cause of it....

21st October: Last lecture for 2009

2009-10-21T01:34:00.000-07:00

Gave my last class for 2009 today. The semester has flown by, now we just have the marking to deal with and some course development work. We are also interviewing for new staff, so enough to keep me off the streets. The research students carry on as usual, although I might give a couple of my chaps an enforced break over xmas, they have been working way too many hours.
Simon had a good day, worked very hard in his therapy sessions and tackled some difficult things. Pizza for tea as a small reward. We talked a lot about work stuff, then had a deal or no deal session. Simon has been wearing shorts as the weather is improving and has sun-burned knees. If you turned the lights out you could see him coming, his knees are so shiny. He is missing George, his old room-mate, and Ron, another chap who always spoke to Simon and gave him a lot of encouragement. Ron has gone home, while George has gone to a hospital nearer his home. I will try to take Simon out of the hospital more now that I have finished teaching. I plan to get him to the optometrist soon, and may be able to combine that after work with a shopping trip and a meal out.
I have also been looking for wheelchair friendly holiday destinations - not a great deal out there sad to say, but I will persevere. It would be nice to get away for a few days.
Our garden has been taken over by birds, there must have been 60 of them this morning, all competing for space on Simon's bird-feeder. The pigeons assemble beneath this and pick up all the crumbs that the smaller birds drop. Skippy is in heaven - although he cannot pounce like he used to, he is enjoying the chase. I can see him licking his lips as I write this.
Today, Simon asked me if we could buy a dog! I suggested that we should wait until Skippy retires, any more change in his delicate life could leave him very traumatised. We already have the prospect of another house-move to get over, he will have to get used to a completely new environment, and the territory is even bigger than before. Come to think of it, perhaps Skippy does need an assistant. If you know of any cat-friendly dogs please tell.

Hope this post makes it, my computer is getting cranky.

Love Marian x

20th October: Raising the game

2009-10-20T22:01:00.000-07:00

19th October: Al-Fresco dining

2009-10-19T01:20:00.000-07:00

We had such a beaut day here in South Australia, I think around 26 degrees, clear blue skies and a slight breeze. It was a pity to have to work on such a day. Met up with Simon and Margaret at the hospital at lunchtime, we both went armed with extra grub so had to take some away. A nice chat, and some laughs. Margaret has managed to get a last minute mini-break to Queensland which sounds idyllic. By chance, some of Margaret's long lost friends will be in Queensland and staying nearby at the same time, they havent seen each other since the 1980s - a lot to catch up on.
Back to work to catch up with a student and guide him on an assignment. I will be marking much of this week and next. Hoping to find some juicy Higher Distinctions amongst them. One of our science students was made a Rhodes scholar this week, he has achieved Higher Distinctions in every topic that he has taken as an undergraduate averaging over 85% - phenomenal. Look out for a Dr Josh Makepeace in the future, he is very special. I hope that he will eventually return to Flinders after his spell at Oxford.
Back to rehab where I returned with the extra grub from lunchtime - a quiche which we shared in the garden. It was such a beautiful evening, Simon and I sat in the warmth and enjoyed some fine conversation and a lovely cuddle.
Sorry to have missed the blog yesterday, had something on my mind, but Simon helped me clear it out this evening. All good. I say good luck to the Potters who thrashed the Hammers on Saturday. These days they look like a decent team and they deserved that win. As for the Hammers, the inability to kick the ball seems to be a bit of a hindrance in their game...
Love Marian x

17th October: A century of posts

2009-10-17T02:01:00.000-07:00

Just realised that this is my one hundreth post on this blog. In politics they always count the first one hundred days and then report on what the president/prime minister has actually achieved. The honeymoon period is over, as they say. Our honeymoon is only just beginning. I love Simon more deeply now than I ever did, and treasure all the time we have together. And our first 100 days have been remarkable.
We spent the afternoon happily at home with a Steve Coogan DVD (the one about the pest controller), it was hilarious. Well done, BBC. By the way, I am still waiting for my Corrie Street episodes that were promised! Simon managed to get in and out of his armchair again without any great difficulty. I am beginning to regret buying it in leather because he does slide downwards in the chair. The fabric version might have been better.
Dug up some spuds from the veggie patch and had those for tea. I am worrying that we will not be able to eat all of the potatoes that we have grown (approximately 90 kilos; twice my weight!). Maybe I can swap some for lemons with my neighbours.
Think there are a bunch of Whitaker birthdays imminent or recent. Happy birthdays guys, go wild!
Love Marian x

16th October: Lining up for the flu jab

2009-10-16T01:34:00.000-07:00

Spent a while lining up for the swine flu vaccine this morning. This is now freely available to everyone in Australia. It reminded me of school days where we all had to move in single file through the nurses station with our sleeves rolled up. Jab, "ouch!" "Next!". The kids in front used to filter messages back down the line about the length of the needle - by the time the message reached me the needle was reported to be four foot long! Thankfully, the swine flu jab was painless. I met a young man in the waiting room who has an acquired brain injury, he overheard me talking to my colleague about Simon and said "I used to be like that". Two years on from a car accident he is on his feet, talking, and back at Uni studying science. I have arranged to meet up with him for a coffee next week, I love to hear these success stories.
Because of the flu line, I was a bit late for my meeting with a research student. He was very understanding, and seems to be making good progress despite juggling very many responsibilities. Off to rehab to meet Simon for lunch - he was nowhere to be found. I looked everywhere and began to worry that he had absconded. He has a small amount of money and I wondered if he had managed to blag his way onto a bus. After about fifteen minutes he came rolling along the corridor, he had been in an unscheduled occupational therapy session. Phew!
Simon had exciting news. He has been fitted with a plastic back-slab for his right leg. This keeps the leg straight and supports his ankle when he is standing. With this he was able to use an exercise bike for the first time today. It is a special bike that you wheel the chair up to, then strap the feet onto the pedals. The left leg does the pedalling but of course has the effect of moving the right leg. Fantastic, and there was a visible reduction in the swelling in Simon's right leg just from a few minutes' workout. He is hoping to do a lot more of this.
Back to work to see another postgrad who is interested in doing some work with us. A nice guy and I think he will do a good job for us. Later ran into another postgrad that I taught last semester. On hearing about Simon, he said he and his mates would come to my house at any time to do any heavy, manual jobs - sometimes, I feel overwhelmed by the kindness of Flinders people.
Spent half an hour at a gathering of social science research students and supervisors. It was a good turnout, and I think we will continue to get together from time to time.
Finally back to the hospital via Maccas for Simon's dinner. Found myself nearly asleep on Simon's bed at 6pm. It has been a long week. Home visits arranged for Saturday and Sunday, I hope for a nice warm, peaceful weekend and three points for the Hammers.
Love Marian x

October 15th: Keynote delivered

2009-10-15T01:54:00.000-07:00

Phew, what a busy day. Spent much of it on the road shuttling between the City, Flinders and the Hospital. Had to give lectures in two of those places. The keynote went quite well, and I fielded some questions at the end. It was quite a sedate conference with around 70 participants. Was able to pitch in with some nice, recent labour market data on South Australia, all of the forecasts are for workforce expansion. Quite where we will find the 70,000 or so extra bodies that we need to fulfil our requirements in the next five years was a critical question. Skilled migration is one answer, and it may be that we can attract some people from NSW and Victoria with our lifestyle. Of course, we don't have enough water for them, so they will have to get used to washing in sand! The only time I have washed in sand was in the outback, where there really is no water, and it was quite effective except that my hair stood up like Dennis the Menace for about a week. Anyway, most importantly, we need more accountants and auditors, so any of you guys in the UK struggling with recession, get yourself a skilled migrant visa and we will welcome you to Adelaide with open arms.

Mel started her new job yesterday - working with a terrific outfit that designs exclusive (really) travel experiences and accommodation for very elite clients. Their accommodation portfolio is out of this world. Mel is going to add so much value to this business, she is absolutely in her element. Good on ya, Mel.

With all my rushing around, I didn't get to Simon until past 6pm. He was already in bed feeling a bit off-colour. He felt cold and didn't want to eat. I did persuade him to eat something, and a very kind nurse took the ham sandwich that was delivered on his tray and toasted it for him. He perked up quite a bit after that.

He received a wonderful present in the post from the Swifts netball team in NSW, they sent him a team photo with all of their signatures. It is a real treasure, and we will display it on his bedroom wall. The male nurses on the ward have all popped in to have a look, I noticed that all of them, to a man, crouched down to see if it was possible to look up their skirts! Naughty boys. Anyway, thanks Swifts, also for the lovely get well card that you sent to Simon. You are on our 'heaven list'; Simon and I have a list of people that we would invite round for tea when we get to heaven. The list is quite lengthy and growing.

Rushed home worrying that Skippy hadn't been fed and would be fretting. He was still in bed....

Love Marian x

October 14th: Simon visits McLaren Vale

2009-10-14T04:36:00.000-07:00

Buzzed around a lot today. In to work for consultation and stuff, up to see Simon for lunch, then back for my lecture which went well, I think. Back to the hospital for 3.30pm to collect Simon for our big trip to McLaren Vale. We eventually got away in the taxi with a wonderful driver, Raymond, mature and experienced. He told us that they used to train their drivers by making them sit in a wheelchair in the back of the cab then roar around Adelaide with them hitting speed bumps at 5omph, screaming to a halt at traffic lights, and taking bends at outrageous speeds. This taught new drivers what it was like to be a wheelchair passenger with a bad driver. I do not know why they discontinued this training, very valuable experiential learning if you ask me.

Got to the Vale early, so we were dropped of at the pub - good access. Simon had a sneaky beer, then we walked to our potential new home. We found a secret way, known only to a few, using a side passage behind the chinese restaurant. There are some wicked kerbs, but fortunately Gerry was in charge of the wheelchair and we had two portable ramps with us (great things).
So we arrived at the house, got in with the portable ramps, and managed to explore most of the house and garden in the wheelchair. Gerry was studying this and can see where we need to widen doors etc. The damp problem seems to be unimportant. Simon loves the house, and has designs on whole chunks of it for his music collection. I am so relieved that he likes it, and now we can proceed with the purchase.

From there, we went to the Barn restaurant, just on the corner. Had an excellent meal and even better wine. I managed to find a half bottle of wine that Simon had wanted to taste for two years, Simon Hackett's Shiraz. It was excellent. Margaret and Gerry joined us for dinner, good company, and essential assistance. Thanks guys.

Mel started her new job today - congratulations! Now you can believe that the Oz economy is in good shape. The Wynne family alone are awesome for their productivity and added value. I predict that South Australia is going to be a ripper these next few years, tell your friends, and come to SA; we need more good people in SA (but please bring your own water...).

Returned Simon to rehab tired but in good spirits. Helped to get him to bed and left him warm and cosy. I hope that today gave Simon a glimpse of a very positive future for us.

Love Marian x

13th October: Lashing rain

2009-10-13T01:56:00.000-07:00

If anybody ever tells you that South Australia is a dry state, disbelieve them. This has been an outrageous day for rain, near invisibility on the road. I simply had to trust in the driver in front of me, and the person behind me had to do the same. Wicked. It is the kind of rain that could knock you down, seriously you poms don't know what rain is. Consequently, I have been soaked through twice today. Had the curious experience of a student consultation session with both of us visibly steaming from the knees. We chose not to speak of it. Silly really.
Found Simon in good spirits at lunchtime, we worked through our shortlist of abstracts, came up with ten, then six that fitted with a loose theme. This selection process feels so much like being in a star chamber. I worry about those that we are rejecting. Some of them we know are so good that they will go on to find places in other journals and we reject in the hope that they will. Simon even rejected his own paper. Now that is professional.

We spent some time with the occupational therapist discussing the equipment that we will need at home. She has ordered an electric wheelchair, a self-propel shower chair, and a whoopee cushion (air filled cushion for the chair, quite expensive); we also asked about ramps and things that we will need. It may take many months to get the wheelchair and Simon has to convince everyone that he can drive it without running people over (a sort of driving test). For this reason, we have to get Simon to keep paying attention to his right side, where his vision is impaired. So even though it would be more convenient to have everything in his room arranged on his left side, we have to deliberately arrange it on his right hand side to force him to pay attention. Sometimes, I think about what I know about learning theory and wonder why we can't be more creative and sophisticated. Tom Bourner, and others, any thoughts?
Great news from the Swifts Ladies Netball team, they have replied. Good on ya Swifts.
Tomorrow I have planned to take Simon to see our new house (we have until Wednesday midnight to pull out of the contract), I hope he likes it. Important that I get him there before we decide. Gerry is also going to check out a building problem indicated by the ant surveyor, a bit of damp that would attract termites and must be dealt with. After this we will go to the Barn restaurant in McLaren Vale for a lovely meal. I have asked the taxi company for their best, mature drivers. Fingers crossed about that.
Today, Simon declared that he wanted to be free of the hospital by the time Asher arrives so that they can go out on the lash together. I have promised to do all that I can to make that possible. Asher, I hope that your muscles are in good shape! Looking forward to your visit and good luck in your new home.

Marian x

October 12th: Reviewing abstracts

2009-10-12T02:47:00.000-07:00

Off to work (Shelly's birthday, they were all having cake lucky things), Shelly proclaimed that she would rather be at work than having a day off for her birthday because she loves Flinders so much. Told you, Flinders rocks; I'm not making it up. Then off to rehab for Simon's lunch. He was having a speech therapy session, so I was despatched for coffees. Am a bit fed up that the speech therapist makes him do the speech therapy in his bedroom because of the MRSA, she said that she would otherwise have to wipe down her room. I thought she should wipe it down anyway. He only gets to touch the table and a pencil. It is not good that he is being confined to his room in this way. I will take him outside as much as I can. The weather was nasty today. Margaret joined us for lunch and brought Simon two new fleeces that we had ordered from the Blokes Shop. She also took the precaution of buying him a toasted sandwich - just as well, his lunch was not appetising.
This evening we worked through 75 abstracts for the journal, and shortlisted 16. We will work on it again tomorrow to get this down to 10.
Spent the last half-hour on Deal or No Deal, the guy was a wicked gambler and won the car. Never seen that before.
I have written to the Swifts (netball team) to ask them where I can find a poster for Simon's room.
Returned home to a call re the termite inspection. All probably OK, but something to check in the bathroom wall which is damp - termites love damp wood, they get to eat and drink at the same time. Gerry has agreed to come and look at this on Wednesday and I am hoping to spring Simon from rehab to come look at the place at the same time. We will go armed with a ramp and bits of handy wood to make sure we can get Simon into the house. I hope that he likes it. While in the Vale, I will see if we can book a restaurant for Wednesday evening, that will round off our day nicely.
Marian x

October 11th: Simon the Commis Chef

2009-10-11T00:28:00.000-07:00

A bit of housework this morning, then off to collect Simon from rehab. Found him in good spirits and ready to go. The whole of our neighbourhood had decided it was the day for garage sales and we popped into the neighbour's three doors down. Simon scored a tigger soft toy to go with his collection, he does look a bit like Skippy.
Home for lunch and then some music. Simon sat out in the shade and directed my gardening activities. I was just pottering really, tidying up and weeding. He is desperate to go to the garden centre and spend loads on plants, but of course that needs to wait until we have moved. In McLaren Vale, there are two garden centres that he could get to in his wheelie, so they are in for a sales bonanza when Simon arrives.
At tea-time, Simon announced that he was going to help in the kitchen, here you can see him making the salad which he did quite well (note our cat Skippy trying to sneak into a kitchen cupboard). His plan is to learn to cook properly so that he can have my dinners ready when I come home from work. Good plan, Shurv!
In a further break for independence, Simon has decided that he will take taxis from and to rehab by himself at weekends. I wasn't too happy about this but agreed to a compromise, I will drive to the hospital and see him into the taxi, checking out the driver and vehicle first. If I am happy, he travels alone and I drive my car in front. Then for the return in the evening, I check out the driver and vehicle, and if satisfied he travels back alone. This worked well today because we had two mature drivers with good vehicles. I phoned to check that Simon had arrived safely, of course he had.
Rain this evening to save me from watering the yard.
Love Marian x

10th October: Comfy at home

2009-10-10T01:32:00.000-07:00

Found Simon out in the hospital garden this morning, he was already sunburned on the neck and arms, thankfully someone had slapped a flat cap on his head. Headed straight off in a taxi - not the best journey, it was one of the smaller cabs, quite uncomfortable and then the driver overcharged. What kind of dirty scoundrel overcharges disabled people?

We popped into Jan's nextdoor and ended up staying for lunch which was very good. Back home, and after checking the email Simon decided he would like to get in his new armchair. He made the transfer from the wheelchair very easily, and here we see him with Skippy on his knee. This chair has many electronic functions including lifting the occupant to a near stand. We don't really know how to use the remote control - the instructions are useless, so it is a matter of trial and error. Getting out of the chair was less easy, and I shouted for Jan next door to come and assist. In fact Simon made the transfer without any lifting assistance from us, we just needed the confidence of having another person on hand.

We watched TV, a spot of dinner, then back to rehab in another small taxi, thankfully with a good driver who didn't charge like a wounded bull. Got him settled in then home. A spot of ironing, then a nice bath and bed for me.

Love Marian x

9th October: Settling down

2009-10-09T01:49:00.000-07:00

Off to work early to deliver a full-day workshop on negotiations. Only four students, and they were all lovely. Knocked out most of my input by 11.30 then set them up in two groups on a fiendish negotiation exercise. I was able to steal away for an hour to visit Simon at Repat, and was happy to find him sitting out in the day room with his fish and chips lunch (always the same of Fridays). They had not yet had confirmation of the MRSA, and so he was still in the same bedroom.
Back to work for the afternoon workshop. The students eventually did reach a negotiated settlement, but only after lying, cheating, and going to the brink of walk-out. Funny this, since when I asked them to assess their preferred conflict handling style first thing this morning, they all claimed to prefer collaborative approaches! We also gathered some nice insights into their previous experiences of negotiating - everything from buying cars from dodgy dealers to the role of mothers in brokering peace between battling siblings. I was pleased with my day's work and left them with homework to devise a plan to negotiate their own starting salaries. A very real assignment for them.
Dashed home to cook something for Simon's tea, managed to put a reasonable meal together, then back to the hossie. In the meantime, Simon's MRSA had been confirmed and identified; it is a very common one and well understood. I think there is at least one other case on the ward, not someone that Simon has had close contact with, so may have been passed by health staff. Hand hygiene is the most important containment technique. We are asked to use an alcohol gel on our hands when entering and leaving a room, this is straight forward enough. This germ will not make Simon ill, it is actually widespread in the community, many people carry it on their skin. It is only the risk to very sick patients, especially those with surgical wounds, or poor immune systems e.g. chemo patients, that presents the problem and so they must do everything possible to isolate it. Repat has a very good reputation of fighting this, and even recently recorded a 150 day spell of no MRSA incidents, a rare thing.
Simon has been moved to his own room, and it is rather pleasant looking out onto a garden courtyard, and he has a patio door that he can open and go walk about if he chooses. Also the luxury of his own bathroom which is roomier than the old one. With a bit of cheering up, it will be quite comfortable. I plan to take in some posters for the walls - inevitably he asked for a poster of the Swifts ladies netball team! Another advantage is that Simon can now choose which side of the bed to put his table. In the old room everything was put on his right hand side, which is the wrong side of course. All in all, things are not so bad. The staff are using gloves, but not masks or gowns because the germ is not airborne. That's a great relief for Simon, he was freaked out when his physio team turned up yesterday gowned and masked, he thought they were going to take him to surgery. His Doctor has been in and out several times today talking to Simon and explaining that he is safe, which he is. So too are all the people who have visited Simon. Visitors are still always welcome, just follow the hand hygiene instructions displayed around the ward.
George, Simon's old room mate, is leaving Repat next Tuesday. He is going to a hospital at Meningie which is only 70kms from his home (currently he is around 250kms away from home). This will give his family better access. They hope from there to get him home completely once the alterations to his house are complete. Simon and George have promised to stay in touch, and we will try to meet up with him at his son's hometome of Strathalbyn which is not so far from us. George has been a very good mate to Simon and I thank him. What struck me about George was that although he had everything to complain about what had happened to him, he never once did complain.
Thanks to David McGladdery for the talking books - great series of Peter James novels, I have read three of them so will appreciate them too. Simon spoke with Shirley last night and said that she had a good night out with Eleanor and then Asher collected her next day. Hope the English weather is behaving well.
Simon will come home for Saturday and Sunday afternoon. We plan to review some abstracts for a journal that he edits, then relax and chill out. He took five steps in the gym today. This evening, Simon told me the only thing he could give me was his heart; that's good enough for me, Shurv. Just keep it ticking.
Love Marian x

8th October: Superbug

2009-10-08T01:37:00.000-07:00

Had a good start to the day, worked on some papers then into see Simon briefly for lunch. Caught the end of the speech therapy session where, sure enough, Simon had imposed his own agenda and had the therapist helping him to send text messages! Had to dash away for my lecture starting at 1pm and made it in good time. Unfortunately, the video recording of my lecture yesterday had great visual but no audio, the lapel mic wasn't working and because I move about constantly the lectern mic didn't pick up much. I now have the task of recording a podcast this evening. At today's lecture I stuck myself to the lectern and told the students to signal to me if they saw me drifting from my post. It was really quite uncomfortable being forced to stand in one place, not my style at all. However, it had the desired result and the broadcast is fine (apart from my mobile ringing, most embarassing). At the end of the class a young man waited behind to talk to me, he is about 23 years old and has an acquired brain injury from which he is now nearly recovered. This happened in a car accident over two years ago, and the effect of the injury is similar to what has happened to Simon. He generously shared information about his journey to recovery. His speech is fluent, he can use both hands, and he walks without sticks. I was so inspired and thank him if he is reading this blog today. I told Simon about you, he says "terrific".
Unfortunately, the phone call during the lecture turned out to be from the hospital. Simon has tested positive for an MRSA, a superbug. He was extremely upset about this. Instantly the staff implemented barrier nursing procedures: masks, gowns, gloves; he is being kept separated from other patients as much as possible, and they plan to move him to a single room tomorrow. So he and George will be broken up. This is such a shame, and I know that the move tomorrow will be stressful. Worse still, I cannot be there because I have a full teaching day. I had a quick look on the web about MRSA, and realise that I just don't know enough about microbiology to be able to offer any suggestions. The path lab were still working on finding out which strain we are dealing with.
Managed to help Simon to bed with only one nurse assisting, I think that I can do this on my own now, and will attempt this tomorrow. The only positive spin on today's news that I could think of was that Simon having the privacy of his own room opens up all sorts of possibilities....
I was warned early on that there would be many set-backs on this journey. Send up some prayers please.
Love Marian x

October 7th: Shirley lands safely

2009-10-07T01:23:00.000-07:00

Off to work this morning, a busy week with quite a bit of teaching. Knocked out some more tute notes then off to see Simon for lunch. He was well rested and brighter today. He was disgusted with the vegetable lasagne they gave him for lunch and pushed this away. I tasted it, and agreed, it bore little resemblance to a lasagne (pasta far from al dente) and the vegetable component seemed to be cabbage! I promised to make it up to him with fish and chips for tea. Spent half an hour in the sunshine in the secret garden where Simon told me that he had managed to take four steps in the gym this morning, his physios had aimed for two. Well done, Shurv. Also he was talking about his plan to learn how to use the text messaging feature on his phone, and so you might expect a few practice texts over the next week or so. His phone is not the best thing, the keypad is tiny and I can barely see the screen. I will look for something more suitable - for this, I will need to consult some young people!
Spent a pleasant afternoon in the lecture theatre and consultation meetings. I am trying to engage our students with reflective learning and have set a learning journal assessment for them. They were confused. So I tried a bit of self-disclosure today. Told them what had happened to Simon and that I keep this blog (a type of journal), and that from time to time I reflect on the amazing stuff that I have learned over the last three months, giving some examples. Also that I have reflected on the things that I still need to learn, and my limitations. I could see the penny-dropping in every part of the lecture theatre. My students now have the address of this blog. Hi guys, welcome to my little corner of the world! Looking forward to working with you over the next few weeks.
Dashed around the supermarket, bought fish and chips, and off to the hospital to see Simon. I told him all about my day, and he interjected many times to ask questions about the lecture.
Home to the news that Shirley has landed safely, has just had a full English breakfast in her Bed and Breakfast at Gatwick, and is now planning a long snooze. Night night, sleep tight.
Then just now an email from Simon's student, Matthew, he has been interviewed by ABC radio news (similar to the BBC for you poms) about their paper on rescuing the archives of low lying nations. This will be aired Thursday or Friday, and will be available as a recording on www.radioaustralia.net.au/pacbeat. Good on you, boys.
I am struggling a little to keep Simon positive, he knows that three months was a big milestone clinically and that we will have to battle our way from here, inch by inch. Keep the messages coming please, they lift both of us.
Love Marian x

6th October: Shirley flies to London

2009-10-06T01:34:00.000-07:00

Up early and did a spot of gardening and some work before taking Shirley to the airport. She was quickly checked in at the Qantas desk, and even got to take her excess luggage without being charged. We were issued with a miniscule wheelchair and told to wait at the coffee shop on the departures side. Getting through the security screen was quite a palaver, but eventually we got through and settled Shirley at the coffee shop with a cappucino and a biscuit. The flight got away almost on time I think and good weather all the way up to Singapore. Shirley will land there in about an hour's time. Hope she managed to get some kip.
From the airport straight to the hospital to see Simon at lunchtime. I found him very tired and not wanting to eat. Managed to persuade him to eat some fish and some fruit. Margaret and Raina came to visit, and that perked him up a bit - he likes to see the baby, she is wonderful entertainment. Today she was chattering with George, and skipping around like a wallaby. Simon had OT and physio appointments this afternoon, but he couldn't make it, he was visibly wilting in the chair. So I arranged for him to be helped into bed, and left him to snooze.
Finally made it to work to see my research student. She had been trying to phone me to say she hadn't got much done and could we postpone. So I agreed to see her again later in the week. Slippages in research schedules are inevitable especially when you are raising kids and working. Managed to knock out some notes for my tutors for next week's seminars - might possibly have given them too much to do.
Drove down to Marion to the library and had to fess up about my late returns. They were very forgiving and said that I was one of their best offenders!
Back to the hospital with a take-away from Maccas to find Simon still in bed, but terribly uncomfortable and wet. He had tried to drink a cup of tea lying down. This had gone straight down his neck and he was lying in a pool of cold tea. The staff were all busy with supervising dinner and dishing out drugs, so I managed to get him undressed, washed down, sheet changed, dressed in pyjamas, and sitting up comfortably watching Deal or No Deal. It did take a bit of effort and ingenuity, but I am pleased to have achieved this. One step closer to coming home.
Simon enjoyed his Angus burger and chips - not good for him to have often, but better than the chick pea curry that they had planned for him this evening (it was gruesome). At least I didn't have to cook this evening.
Not sure why Simon was so tired today. It could be that we had three day's home leave and that took it out of him, although yesterday we were very relaxed at home. It could be a medication thing. Hoping that he will pick up tomorrow, not good to miss physio four days in a row.
Have to dash around the rest of the week, lecturing tomorrow and Thursday, then a full day workshop on Friday. Worried about how I will cover Simon's lunchtime sessions now that Shirley has gone home. I will see if Mel and Pen can come down on Thursday or Friday.
Skippy has been worried all day. He saw Shirley's suitcases, and always associates these with being shoved in a catbox, sent half way round the world, and left starving in quarantine. When I got home he was very relieved and has spent the last half hour wrapped round my ankle while I write this blog - very warm actually, must get one for the other leg.
Simon now has his mobile phone at the hospital and may be making calls. If you hear from him, he can understand everything that you say, so tell him everything.
Love Marian x

5th October: Three months

2009-10-05T02:14:00.000-07:00

Up early, checked the Hammers result (fair) then whipper-snipped the grass verge. Pesky job, the line keeps breaking and you have to stop and reset it every 3 minutes. Serves me right for buying the cheap strimmer from Bunnings (B&Q for you poms).

This is the photo that I was trying to put up yesterday. Here we see Simon and George being loaded into the Access Taxi. I usually sit beside Simon. Look at the colour of George, brown as a berry - he is a farmer, from country Australia.

We had a public holiday today (Labour Day), and I was able to bring Simon home for the afternoon. We watched "The Chant of Jimmy Blacksmith" - more violent than I had expected despite reading the book decades ago. I know that Kennealy has been roundly criticised for this work, but it still taught me some things.

We had a nice meal using veg from the garden, then time for Simon and Shirley to say farewell. This was tearful and choking. I am mindful of Jelina's comment on yesterday's post, in Ngarrindjeriwe culture they don't say "goodbye", they say "see you later...".

See you later, Shirley.

We are now exactly three months into Simon's Journey. I reflect on that terrible night three months ago, and thank God that Simon has been saved. Simon does not always see it that way, but I know that the rest of you do.

Love Marian x

4th October: Simon and George at home

2009-10-04T02:47:00.000-07:00

Couldn't work out the camera today, so have uploaded a photo of Simon walking in the gym last week.

Daylight savings time arrived today, I forgot and was rushing about already an hour late for everything this morning. That aside, we had an excellent day. After signing the contract on the new house I picked up Simon and his room-mate, George, from Rehab and back home for a nice lunch. We managed to get them both into one access taxi. George now has an electric wheelchair so very easy for him to get around; he reckons this wheelchair is worth around $16,000 and all provided for by the state. Nice work South Australia. We cooked steak, chips and salad washed down with a couple of cold ones. George was good company, and I hope these two lads will stay in touch after rehab.

We listened to some nice music, then the lads fell asleep in the sunshine. Don't worry I protect them from the rays. While they slept I made a pizza for tea. Checked their blood sugars, then returned them to rehab in perfect condition. I am a little proud of myself that I could manage two very disabled men without incident.

Daylight savings produced a wonderful free hour to work in the garden this evening. So despite the inconvenience at the beginning of the day, I was very grateful for it by this evening.

Simon comes home again tomorrow because we have a public holiday. He has requested a quiet day indoors with the DVD. Perfect .

Love Marian xx

3rd October: Come on Ozzie, come on, come on...

2009-10-03T03:12:00.000-07:00

Today I became an Australian Citizen, no longer a pom, and will be cheering for the home side next ashes series. Do not worry, I am still a hammers supporter - there are no rules against that, even Obama supports West Ham (hopeless optimists we are). Today's picture shows me with the Mayor of Holdfast Bay receiving my precious certificate. That's 'going straight to the pool room'. Wonder how many poms will get that reference! Now I am just showing off my Ozzie credentials and must stop it.

Got to rehab at 8am to get Simon ready for his long day out. It was my first experience of getting Simon up, washed, dressed, shaved, breakfast from start to finish. Quite challenging actually, and an insight into the extent of help that I am going to need when Simon comes home. However, we got away on time and arrived at Glenelg very early so whiled away some time in a cafe. It was so nice just to be a couple in a cafe on a Saturday morning. I have resolved to do more of that type of thing, and it seems that Glenelg is a good destination for us - excellent wheelchair access. We would love to live there but the prices are well outside our range. Also discovered that it is possible to get the wheelchair onto the tram which takes us right into Adelaide, now we are rocking. Plenty of venues and CD shops and high end gear that Simon wants to get his hands on!

I digress. From the cafe to the Town Hall for the Citizenship Ceremony - all very nicely done. We had my sister Margaret, her husband Gerry, my nieces Melanie and Penny, Shirley, and Marg Stovall. Marg works with me and I was so made up that she turned out for me today. Marg, you are a trooper, and thank you so much for the lovely present.

We all gathered in a magnificent council chamber, red carpet everywhere. I stood to take the oath, received my certificate from the Mayor, and that was about it. Except that it was really a very emotional thing to be accepted as a citizen of this lucky country. I feel very proud to be an Australian today.

After the ceremony, we went to a cafe. Simon did a quick detour to the CD shop with Mel, then onto lunch at the Dublin Pub. They were really excellent. Good food and service, easy access, just very nice. We were very relaxed. Then my phone rang. The estate agent. Our offer on the house in Mclaren Vale is accepted! Can this week get any better?

Simon and I spent a little more time shopping then home for the afternoon. He snoozed under the front verandah while I mowed the lawn. A spot of tea, then back to rehab for a well earned rest for Simon. He was exhausted, happy, but desperate to get home permanently. It will soon come, my Simon.

Love Marian x

PS we have an unexpected day off on Monday (I never remember the public holidays), so Simon can come home three days in a row.

2nd October: Busy day

2009-10-02T03:30:00.000-07:00

Ran Shirley to the dentists first thing, then back to see an estate agent, made an offer on a house now we wait.... the owners are in India on holiday so may not be reading email regularly (not that they are short of IT there). A spot of reading, then off to see Simon. Fish and chips for his lunch. One of Simon's speech therapists was leaving today (a student at the end of her placement). She is a very lovely person and Simon wanted to thank her with a present. We found a box of chocolates and he gave them to her this afternoon. She was really touched.

Left Simon in a happy state while I returned to work for a meeting with my Phd student. He is at the reading-in stage, and it was fascinating to observe a student discovering concepts from the literature that I had almost forgotten the origins of: Marx, Durkheim, Weber. It is good to touch base with these great works again. His work will be on some aspect of work-life balance. At the end of the tutorial I asked him to spend some time reflecting on his own work-life balance - like most part-time students he is juggling way too many eggs. I am co-supervising this thesis with a superb colleague from NILS, a sociologist who did her Phd about activists (trade unionists, peace campaigners, and womens' rights campaigners), their passion, and the way in which they fit their lives, family and work around this. Real good stimulation.

Dashed back to Rehab for Simon's tea, to find him wheeling himself out of the building declaring that he had to get away from there. I quickly went to investigate what might have been happening in his room (we did have a wandering patient yesterday claiming to have been kidnapped and offering Simon money to help her escape). When I got there, only George in a brand new electric wheelchair, nothing wrong at all. Shirley intercepted Simon at the front door, and I took him for a walk to calm down, could only determine that something had happened at 4.30pm, and he had been pushed. George managed to tell me that a casual member of staff had wheeled Simon off at 4.30pm then recently brought him back smashing him into the door frame, and Simon was demanding to be left alone. It took me ages to persuade him to go into dinner, then the dinner was revolting so had to rush to the cafe and get a baked potato for him. I was run ragged. Eventually I got to the bottom of it. A casual member of staff came to collect Simon at 4.30pm and wheeled him into the dreaded dining room despite his protests, which I can imagine were blue. When he tried to wheel himself out again he was pushed back and told to stay there. At this point he put up such a fight that a regular member of staff discovered the situation and said that he was to be taken back to his room to wait for his family, and at this point they smashed into the door. A long story, but illustrative of some of the difficulties that Simon has to deal with on this steep road to recovery. It is good that he is prepared to put up a fight, also that Shirley and I arrived just in time to stop him hurtling down the Goodwood Road!
Simon was still upset this evening, and it took a long time to pacify him. I tried to lift him by describing all of our planned events for this weekend. We have a public holiday on Monday, so I will be allowed to spring him from Rehab three days in a row. I am hoping that he will be able to get into his new armchair (complete with gentle ejector seat) - although this time I will make sure to have plenty of help at hand.
Too tired to cook so Shirl and I had take-away fish and chips this evening. Terrific.
Love Marian x

1st October: Short back and sides

2009-10-01T03:59:00.000-07:00

Two meetings this morning then off to see Simon, arrived in time to join him for speech therapy. This was a good session using the computer, they are trialling some new software which gets the patient to look at pictures and select matching words, also listening to spoken sentences then clicking the image that best represents the situation being described. Simon zipped through several levels making only two errors, and even I thought the pictures on those two were hard to see. Simon was able to use the mouse competently with his left hand. The speech therapist said that he had made great strides over the past week. I was really pleased.
We had lunch in his room then the hairdresser came, she gave him a neat short back and sides, and he looks quite handsome. I had forgotten to take him any clean shirts, so was dispatched to the shops to buy two new polos. Then back to work for a while. Dropped by Glenelg to check the wheelchair access at the Town Hall (all good) and reccied a chair friendly route around the town. On the way back to my car I came across a disability equipment shop having a closing down sale. I scored a beautiful electric lifting/reclining chair for half price in blue leather. It will actually lift you from sitting to a near stand, and vice versa. We will test this out on Saturday arvo.
This evening we had a short visit, dinner was rather grey so we had to get him a pie. After a spot of TV I wheeled him back to his room where we were joined by an unfortunate wandering lady who has amnesia. She was telling us that she had been kidnapped and if we could get her out her parents would give us a lot of money (she was in her late 60s). I went to get a nurse urgently and on return found her trying to hide behind Simon's curtains! Poor thing doesn't know what is happening to her, but a bit distressing. I hope she doesn't make a habit of hiding in Simon's room. I hurried back to Marion to get my hair cut - Simon's is rather better than mine and cost a third of the price!
Just phoned Simon to say goodnight, he was trying to tell me that someone had phoned him. He told me it was John Lennon! After some discussion, I realised that he meant Asher (sorry Asher he doesn't get on so well with names), so for tonight you are an ex-Beatle. Anyway, we learned that you have been successful in getting the house. Well done! and Thanks to St Joseph. Now we need St J. to watch over our next venture into the property snakepit. I only began the process of house-buying/selling in earnest a week ago and already feel stressed. Roll on Friday.
Love Marian x

30th September: Permanent resident!

2009-09-29T22:59:00.000-07:00

Sorry I missed the blog yesterday, I was househunting in the Vale and stayed over last night. Have good news to report, I have found a house that we both like and although it needs some modifications, it is very achievable. Just need to sort out the finances etc. Joined Simon first thing this morning for his physio session where I am learning to assist him. Then watched him in the gym where he was standing using just a hand rail, and then miraculously, he shifted his right leg forward one step! He could not put his weight on the leg, but there was distinct movement from the hip. Hooray for Simon. Zapped in to work then back to the hospital for lunch. He was happy sitting in the sun and quite chatty.

Then came home to fantastic news that Simon's permanent residency visa has been approved! I phoned the news through to the hospital, he is going to be so excited. So many milestones achieved today, I am beaming.

Love Marian x

28th September: A visit from Henk

2009-09-28T04:32:00.000-07:00

A hectic start to the day with a plumber and a rubbish skip arriving before 9am. The plumber needed to clear a blockage in our drain and he was really having trouble, I feared that he was going to start digging under the house. However, after two hours of pushing and shoving he managed to clear the problem and all is well. A bit expensive but he didn't waste time and refused all cups of tea. Then Gerry and Rachael turned up to clear a great pile of bricks into the skip - this was filled to the top within an hour and we had to order a second skip. Our back yard now looks a lot tidier, and the pool man returned this evening to finish cleaning.

Went to the airport to collect Henk - flight delayed, so had to leave him to find his own way by taxi to the hospital. He arrived just after five and spent a pleasant hour with Simon, they were chattering away and making each other laugh a lot. Henk was really impressed with Simon who was having a terrific speech day. I think it helps when he gets different visitors, they come in with new stories and this engages Simon, he seems to switch on parts of his brain, it certainly triggers his memory.

Henk shouted dinner for Shirley and Me at the Seacliff Hotel this evening. We got there just in time to see the last glimmer of light on a calm, shiny ocean. No dolphins performing for us this evening, but I did get to show off one of our finest beaches. Thanks for the dinner and great company Henk, and good luck for your presentation tomorrow.

Thanks for the email from Andy Kouronios, I read this to Simon this evening, he was really delighted.

Simon's doctor gave us the green light for a full day out on Saturday. Really looking forward to this. We will probably have lunch in Glenelg after the ceremony, then back to our place for a peaceful afternoon.

Today's photo is of Simon working left-handed with his speech pathologist.

All good, Love Marian xx

27th September: New potatoes

2009-09-27T02:36:00.000-07:00

Up early pottering in garden, managed to pot on a few things, then decided it was time to investigate the potato patch. In my experience, potatoes should flower before you can dig them, but this variety I have planted doesn't seem to have any flowers. I dug up five mini spuds and saved them for Simon's supper. There is nothing like a new potato straight out of the soil. I reckon in a couple of weeks they will be a decent size. I will also have broad beans ready to eat next weekend. My brocolli is rubbish, only the slugs are getting a decent feed there.

Collected Simon at lunchtime and brought him home to a bacon sarnie. It was chilly so we stayed indoors watching a DVD of 'The Secret' an Australian detective drama. It was pretty good, although both Simon and Shirley dropped off to sleep and may have missed part of the plot. Simon wanted to stay home for longer, but I did not have a doctor's permission to do that so we had to go back to rehab at 4pm. Next weekend, I hope to spring him at 9am on Saturday in time for my citizenship ceremony at 10am in Glenelg. That is going to involve a bit of racing around in my posh frock. Then I hope we may be able to spend the whole day together.

Henk arrives tomorrow and we are looking forward to his visit. Fingers and legs crossed for the Hammers tomorrow.

Love Marian x

26th September: AFL Finals

2009-09-26T14:05:00.000-07:00

Househunting this morning, arrived at the Vale with a wheelchair to check accessibility. The one I saw was very unsuitable, a wicked slope up the driveway and no access to the bathrooms. Gerry was with me, he will help me make alterations if we do find a good place. I will see some more next week. Also popped in to see the girls, their furniture has arrived from England, it is box city in their lounge. Great to see them getting settled.

Picked Simon up at lunchtime, home just in time for the start of the AFL Final (Australian Rules): St Kilda vs Geelong. We watched this at our neighbour Jan's house, with a bunch of friends plus some barbecue grub. Simon was engrossed in the match. He had a dollar on St Kilda winning by 10, my dollar was on Geelong by 20. Geelong got it by 12 in the end. We had to watch the final quarter at the hospital - it was a good game, and I think I've understood some of the rules now!

I returned to Jan's later in the evening and polished off the white wine, hence writing this blog on Sunday morning. Simon comes home again this afternoon, looking forward to a nice peaceful day.

Love Marian x

25th September: Simon's journey to Flinders

2009-09-25T01:37:00.000-07:00

Simon was whisked off to Flinders Hospital for an MRI scan this morning. The repat hospital called me at work to say that he was on his way - Flinders hospital is just 3 minutes from my workplace. He was a bit distressed by this experience, especially being put in a white gown and having his wedding ring removed (very necessary, big magnets involved). I got to Flinders in time to meet him and settled him while we waited for the scanner. He was in there a long time (I was not allowed into the scanner room), and I think it was tough on him. He was crying a little when he came out and said that he did not want to do that ever again. If it has to happen again I will go in with him. I have been exposed to so much nuclear stuff that it is unlikely to make any further difference to my health. Saw him back to rehab in the ambulance, and managed to rescue his fish and chips lunch.

Most disappointing today, the house at Willunga got sold this morning. I have arranged to see four other places next week.

Filthy weather in Adelaide today, you poms don't know what rain is. So much that our drains are overflowing and now I have to get a plumber to clear some sort of blockage. Have ordered a skip to take away the rubbish from our back yard, then all set to go on the market. Tell your friends, beaut place in South Brighton, hardly lived in because we were always at work, nice swimming pool.

Today's picture is a little dark; this is Simon being loaded into the ambo for his return to rehab.

Love Marian x

24th September: A standing ovation

2009-09-24T02:31:00.000-07:00

Simon's ward had a fire drill this morning and he was evacuated. Quite a performance I think, and this threw out all the therapy sessions. We grabbed a coffee then had lunch together before a meeting with the Doctor. This was a very helpful meeting and Simon was able to ask quite a lot of questions. Most tellingly, "when will I be able to go back to work?". The Doctor was able to recount a story of a previous stroke patient who had been a lawyer and had returned to work part-time after about a year. He said a lot about Simon being so young, that we are in poorly charted territory; most of the research data is based on much older cohorts. Simon was energetic in explaining that he wants to work hard and get home, we talked about the possibility of getting home for an overnighter quite soon.

After this, the occupational therapists helped me to load a wheelchair into my car in readiness for a house inspection tomorrow. Honestly, the weight of the chair was too much for me, I could not get that in and out of the car by myself, so I am going to have to find a technical solution for this. It doesn't help that I am carrying a small injury from last weekend's activities, I've pulled a muscle in the upper left quadrant of my abdomen which gives me a sharp pain from time to time. Gerry will help me get the chair out of the car tomorrow.

Simon has a busy day tomorrow, he has to go in the ambulance to Flinders Hospital for an MRI scan. I will meet him there before going off to see the house at Willunga. Shirley will be on standby at the Rehab to rescue Simon's fish and chips lunch (he was mortified at the thought of missing this).

Managed to knock out the materials for a short-course on negotiations today, then disappointed to find that I have only four students to teach - will have to scale back some of the group activity. Flinders got evacuated again this afternoon due to power outage. Everyone sent home early, hooray! Being serious, not good for anyone who is disabled on the campus. I am becoming acutely aware of these access and egress problems.

Just took a call from Henk who is arriving in Adelaide on Monday. I will grab him from the airport and take him to see Simon. Then he has promised to shout dinner for Shirley and me. I have in mind a beautiful seafront hotel where we often see pods of dolphins, I am wondering about the possibility of Simon joining us and will work on that idea. Henk is also keen to see the Barossa Valley, I will book him a tour on the 'pi** bus' from Adelaide. I once took Frank on one of these, he was legless after the third winery, and there were nine in total!

More advice needed on cats and glucosamine. Does it make them drink more water? Skippy has been very thirsty. I worry about diabetes. If I have to inject the cat everyday I might need to resort to Gail's jacket sleeve tactics!

Today's picture is of Simon with Rachael, Gerry, Margaret and Raina having a picnic in the day room. Now do you see why I could eat Raina?

Love Marian xx

23rd September: Glucosamine and the cat

2009-09-23T02:46:00.000-07:00

I smuggled some Glucosamine into Skippy's food this morning and he ate the lot! Thank heavens, I was worried when I saw Gail's hilarious posting. If it is this easy he will be living up to his name in no time.

Found Simon sitting outside in his wheelchair this morning, he had obviously gone 'walk-about', and is doing quite a lot of that now. There was more good news on the physio front, Simon is to be allowed to stand up to get on the shower chair and the loo, so no more lifting in the gantry. This really encouraged him, the gantry is a wonderful invention (pictured here) but it makes you feel so helpless.

I shared another therapy session with Si this morning, this time we looked at his digital scrapbook (the journal). It was quite interesting, there were a lot of photos of him in action, in the gym, the OT room, and relaxing with family. There were some good snaps from our wedding anniversary. Funny thing is that Simon always hated having his photo taken, now he seems to pose for the camera at every opportunity! The journal also has some data on his recovery showing various assessments and the level of improvement over time. Personally, I think this is potentially a powerful tool if used well. When I asked Simon what he had thought of the journal session, he said it was OK, but he would rather have been working (i.e. writing, reading) and thought it was a low priority activity. I will give them that feedback.

The ward held their monthly BBQ again today, Simon got two helpings of snags and burgers. Margaret and Gerry joined us for lunch, and we talked a lot about buying houses. I am going to see one in Willunga on Friday with Gerry (who is a retired builder); the hospital are loaning me a wheelchair to test the access to the house. I can even get Gerry to sit in it for a proper simulation. If we like the look of it, we will take Simon up to see what he thinks. I will try to see two other properties on Saturday morning.

We briefly spoke with one of Simon's doctors today, he is going to set up an MRI scan at Flinders in a couple of weeks time so that we can find out more about what caused the stroke. The doctor wanted to know if Simon was claustrophobic because of having to go into the tunnel. Simon said "no" while I said "yes". A brief debate ensued at the end of which Simon declared that he was categorically not claustrophobic. Another major change.

The dietician phoned me this morning, we discussed the menu problems - very often they only have chicken on the menu and Simon won't eat this. She is arranging for either fish or an omelette on 'chicken days' from now on. Most of these developments arise out of our team meeting yesterday, so this was very productive.

Mel and Pen came to blitz the house this afternoon, it looks fabulous. Thanks girls, and thanks to Rachael for the lovely shepherds pie.

Back to the hospital for the evening shift, Simon was in very good spirits when I left him. I think the news that he may soon be discharged has really lifted him.

Love Marian x

22nd September: Simon's team meeting

2009-09-22T02:59:00.000-07:00

Si was up, neatly dressed and ready for his rehab team meeting this morning. The room filled with around 10 people plus Simon, Shirley and me. It was like a board of study. We heard summaries from each team: medical, nursing, physio, occ therapy, and speech plus our social worker in the chair, and had a chance to ask most of our questions (a long list). The outcomes were very useful and we now have an idea of the future. Most importantly, his doctor felt that Simon may be ready to leave rehab in about six weeks. Whether he returns home at that point depends on whether our home is suitable for him. So now I have a race on my hands to find a house and sell this one as soon as possible. I have made a start and am going to see a place in Willunga on Friday. I will take the wheelchair with me to see if it is accessible, and what kind of changes we would need to make. The layout of the house is relatively flat, and I have a good feeling about it. The rehab staff have offered to begin training me on lifting and transferring to and from the bed, the car etc. They have agreed to assess him for a powered wheelchair, also to arrange for him to see an opthalmologist. I also suggested a dental check but Simon piped up and said "no, no, not that", you are a coward Shurv. However, it demonstrated that he knows his own mind. I could not persuade the physio to get him into the swimming pool, but will keep pushing for this. Simon participated in the meeting, and thanked everybody at the end. Just after the meeting his Doctor spoke with me privately and said that he might be permitted a small amount of alcohol from time to time. I kept my face straight. After this meeting a spot of lunch for Simon, then more physio. When I got back to him this evening he was having a well-deserved snooze in the chair. He was surprised to see me since he had told me to take the evening off. I couldn't, it makes me fret. Took him a nice dinner and got him to eat all the veg again. I ate his hospital dinner which was lamb curry, not bad actually.
Mel and Pen are coming to blitz the house again tomorrow. They are great girls. They are waiting for their own furniture to turn up from London, then their place will really look and feel like home.
The final word concerns Skippy, our vet says he has a spot of arthritis developing in the back legs and needs glucosamine. I went to the health food shop and bought a bucket of it for $40 (20 quid for you Poms), the lady in the shop uses it on her dog and swears by it. So I am hoping to persuade Skippy that this is good for him, I will try smuggling it into his food tomorrow. Wish me luck.
All good, love Marian xx

21st September: Raining ice-blocks in Adelaide

2009-09-21T02:46:00.000-07:00

After a beautiful three-day spell, Adelaide turned into the stormy City overnight. It has been raining buckets, and in places hail stones as big as golf balls. Untold devastation, cars with a thousand dents, trees and power lines down, roads flooded, and numerous road traffic accidents. It was a bad day to be on the road, which I was almost all day. Managed to arrive home eventually, unscathed plus a pair of new shoes. I considered buying wellies but thought that might not be a good look for the citizenship ceremony. Simon approves of my new shoes, but categorically stated that they should never again be worn with grey socks!
Shirley spent almost all day at the hospital with Simon while I was on the road. There had been an incident this morning and Simon was very upset, threatening to leave the hospital. Shirley couldn't make out what had happened. Eventually, the speech therapist got it. Simon had been left shivering in the shower for an hour. The nurse responsible has apologised. Despite the negatives in this story, there is an upside: Simon is prepared and capable of making complaints, getting them heard, and actioned. Good work, Simon. He also performed what he smilingly called a couple of "stand-up" routines today. His jokes have improved.
Mel went for a job interview today, and gave a good account of herself. I think the company would be very lucky to get someone with her skills and passion for her work. The travel business is not the best to be in just now, but things are picking up and soon they are all going to need good people. By January, I think we will see a lot of labour market activity - people who have been holding tight, jumping ship when they spot an opportunity. We used to call this the "January jump" and the explanations for it are only partly economic, but the economic ramifications are far-reaching (lots of multipliers). The poachers will be standing by waiting for a heap of 'free transfers'. Who will be the losers in this tournament? Those who did not do right by their staff during the 'great recession' (which never really happened in Oz but was oh such a wonderful excuse for 'restructuring'). I enjoyed a long conversation with a potential Phd student today and realistically selling him my University as a place that treats people well, and takes the trouble to give personal attention to students and staff. Flinders rocks, tell your friends, send your kids.
Simon's facebook error continues to generate hundreds of replies, finding friends who still did not know of his condition. Thanks to everyone who has been in touch. We are looking forward to seeing Henk at the end of the month. Henk, I will ring when I get a moment. Simon insists that I take you on a sight-seeing tour and that he is coming with us. Hold onto your hat.....
Love Marian xx

20th September: Skippy and Simon reunited

2009-09-20T03:15:00.000-07:00

This was a remarkable day for so many reasons. After painting the front fence, I set off to collect Simon from rehab. We had decided to eat lunch at home where he tucked into steak and salad (more veggies, hooray!). After lunch I asked Simon what he would like to do. "Go to bed" he said, "Ok" said I, foolishly. I had seen Si get in and out of bed at the hospital with only one person helping, and he really convinced me that he could do this. You can tell that in this we succeeded. The next few paragraphs are missing because they don't belong in the public domain. We have a TV in our bedroom, and later, would you believe it, the Australian women's netball team were on. Simon was on cloud nine. Then even better, Skippy, finding Dad in his natural environment (bed) was reunited with Simon at last. Here they are in the picture. Once again, I am appalled by the state of my house, we have never got around to fitting wardrobe doors!
At 3pm, with an hour to go before our taxi ride back to the hospital, I persuaded Simon to try to get out of bed and back into the wheelchair. I got him sitting up, both feet on the floor, wheelchair ready to slide into, but two problems: i) wheelchair higher than the bed and, ii) first the mattress and then the bed began to slide away from us. He was lying with most of his torso on the bed, feet on the floor, gradually slipping towards the floor. I called the paramedics, and spent a very anxious twenty minutes using all my strength to stop him from falling completely. Shirley arrived after about 15 minutes and helped me by standing the other side of the bed to stop it from moving. Then after 20 minutes the paramedics got here and were brilliant. They slung a couple of belts round him, lifted him to a stand while I shoved from behind, then turned him into the chair. They kind of guessed what had been going on.... If I hadn't been so stressed and exhausted, I might have died from embarassment. Simon's taxi arrived just as the paramedics were leaving, an excellent driver called Abbas, over 40 with his own disabled wife travelling in the back. That's how I like them, mature drivers with a sense of passenger-preservation.
On arriving at the hospital, the staff were asking us "how was your home visit". We will never tell them.... Of course, they may very well have found this blog, in which case, I declare it as a work of fiction and that all similarities to persons living or dead are entirely coincidental!
Love Marian xx

19th September: Facebook error

2009-09-19T02:27:00.000-07:00

If anybody received a facebook invitation from Simon today, sorry guys it was one of those errors. He clicked on something and an invite got sent to his whole email address book including a number of government departments! Very embarassing. You can probably tell from this that we were at home again this afternoon. My day began briskly with a walk to the petrol station, I thought I would just swing by the car and make sure it hadn't been pinched before I bought a gallon of petrol. Still where I left it, I thought I would give it a try. The blighter started, so I drove at 10km per hour to the petrol station and glided onto the pump. A spot of grocery shopping then back for an appointment with an officer from the Australian Bureau of Statistics (great respect for these guys, I used to be one). Our household had been selected for the disability survey (quite randomly). The survey is computer driven, and our household proved to be a real test for the survey design. There were a number of points where the guy said, "ah, you can't give that response". Essentially, it was not set up with the idea of somebody who is recently disabled, requires a great deal of carer support, but is mostly in hospital. It took an hour and 15 minutes, and towards the end I was looking at my watch pointedly needing to pick up Simon for his home visit. Well, I hope it does soom good, even if only to demonstrate that the survey instrument needs some work.
Simon looked good this morning, nice close shave and one of his best shirts. He got out of an occupational therapy session because he saw me arriving and said "that's it, I'm off". We spent a little time outside, taking in the rays, then in for lunch and home. Saw the end of "The Watchmen" then a sit on the verandah and a twirl around the neighbourhood. I have discovered that although pavements have ramps at the kerbs these days, every household driveway (including ours) is a challenge because they create a camber, so I am constantly wrestling with the wheelchair listing to one side. I am going to ask next week about an electric wheelchair, we have a family meeting with the team on Tuesday. In fact our list of prepared questions is very lengthy.
Finished up with an episode of Supernatural, I am finding this more predictable so less scary now. Back to the hospital for dinner, we were very early thanks to a fourteen year old Korean racing driver. These young chaps have a bit to learn, when you drive fast you have to jam on your brakes often, and poor Simon gets thrown forwards then backwards in his chair. Very uncomfortable.
Simon comes home again tomorrow afternoon, I hope for a 55 year old driver with a light touch on the gas.
Love Marian xx

18th September: Out of petrol

2009-09-18T03:03:00.000-07:00

Simon survived his party and managed to get up and go this morning. Just as well the physio turned up just after breakfast. When I arrived he had already done half a day's therapy but had missed his shower. I put that right quickly, Simon is no shower dodger. Had a good chat with him before lunch about designing assessments, then left him with his new DVD player running, he has sussed out the controls already. The batteries do run down quite quickly, so I will see about obtaining a spare one. Knocked out some tute notes this arvo, and had a stab at learning to use an online-survey tool. Not keen on them, but useful for very basic data collection.
I had promised Simon a chinese take-away this evening, but they don't open until 5pm which is too late for Simon to eat (has to be synchronised with medications). At 4pm I hit on the idea of going to the Shopping Mall's food court, collecting a load of Chinese and Indian food, then running back home with it to put it through the microwave and into an insulated container. I knew that the petrol in my car was desperately low but thought I would chance just one more kilometer before stopping for fuel. 400 metres shy of the house it conked out. So I abandoned the car, ran the four hundred metres with the take-away, microwaved and packed it, phoned a cab, and arrived at one minute to five. Thankfully, it was a very nice take-away. Getting home was almost as eventful. Thank God it's Friday.
Simon will come home for his visits on Saturday and Sunday. We are expecting nice weather. At some stage I have to quiz him about what he remembers about his expenses etc in order to do his tax return.
Not sure if I mentioned that my citizenship ceremony is being arranged for 3rd October. Soon be the real thing.
Love Marian xx

17th September: Our wedding anniversary

2009-09-17T05:03:00.000-07:00

Off to work first thing then on to see Simon at lunchtime. We swapped anniversary cards, they made me cry a little. Shared a coffee then Simon was whisked away by a therapist. Thankfully they allowed him a little rest in bed this afternoon. Shirley and I arrived this evening to find him still in bed and desperate to get up and ready for the party. It was dinner time for the other patients so we had to wait a while keeping him entertained unwrapping presents. We had a lovely silver photo frame from Shirley. Surrepticiously my family arrived and colonised the dayroom. Margaret had cooked up a storm, a beautiful buffet, replete with all the condiments. Thank you so much for all that hard work, Margaret. We took the liberty of bringing champagne and some beer. Simon shaved, put on his best shirt, and made his entrance ten minutes late... We had a lovely evening with the family, plus a couple of other patients who joined in happily. We were entertained by Raina, our two year old niece, she loves opening presents and was delighted to help Uncle Simon to unwrap his. Also to blow out the candles on his chocolate cake (twice). Simon tucked into his buffet with some gusto, even more so the champagne and beer. The nursing staff were very understanding about this but said that they would like to use the lifting machine to put him into bed this evening on account of him being so pissed! You can rely on Ozzies to be direct and honest.

Back to the presents, Simon got a portable DVD player, a new fleecy jacket, and a garden gnome painted by Raina in what might be described as 'Picasso Style' - it is priceless. I took a bunch of photos but find I am really not very good at this, so this was the best I could come up with: Gerry, Simon, and Jamie - 'three wise men'.

Love Marian xx

16th September: Simon comments on a paper

2009-09-16T03:34:00.000-07:00

A very wet day in Adelaide, I have been soaked through twice and now discover that my shoes let in water. Despite this we had a good day. Joined Simon for lunch and a coffee, he seemed a little tired but the coffee perked him up quite well. This evening I took him fish and chips (overdid the order on the chips, enough to sink a battleship), then some nice cheese and biscuits. Half hour of TV, a phone call from David N (thanks David sorry to cut you off), then Simon's student arrived. We stayed in the TV lounge where it is quiet and read the paper that he and Simon have written together. A fascinating topic on how to rescue the archives of low lying nations in the Pacific region. He is going to present this paper next week and I think it will attract a lot of interest. I read the paper through to Simon, and he was commenting all through - mainly identifying new parts that had been added, approving of these, suggesting some minor corrections. I couldn't help throwing in my own two-pennies worth. Simon then talked about looking for publication opportunities and to go for a good journal. Our meeting lasted about an hour and Simon was fully engaged. I am very proud of him. Still gushing with pride, I arrived home late and found a dozen red roses with a card from Simon for our anniversary tomorrow. We are having a small party at the hospital tomorrow evening, I will take pictures.
Love Marian xx

15th September: Talking cybernetics

2009-09-15T02:48:00.000-07:00

At work early this morning, then off to join Simon for his speech therapy session. It was great, we had more blind guessing games this time Simon had to look at a photograph of an object or subject and use his hand to describe this with a gesture. Personally I thought it very dangerous to do a session on gestures with Simon, I have seen some distinctly rude ones! He approached it with enthusiasm and between us we did really well. We were roaring with laughter at some of his mimes, and it transpires from one of his gestures that he knows very well how to do the ironing but has always told me that he can't do it..... That's it Shurv, you've got the job. We also did a session on drawing, this was really impressive, he is able to cartoon with his left hand, and it is better than I could produce with my good hand. His picture of a cat was spot on and sophisticated rather than the naive doodle that I would come up with. The best moment was when he was asked to look at a photograph and said "that's grotesque, lardy", I couldn't guess what this could be: a monster? It was a picture of a very large lady lying down on the floor, I think doing pelvic floor exercises. When I saw it I agreed that it was very gruesome.
At lunchtime we had a swift discussion about the teaching of cybernetics (I have to give a lecture on managerial control soon), it was incredible and we cooked up a fiendish exercise for my students to attempt to devise a cybernetic system for some activity in their everyday lives - of course they will fail in this attempt, but that is where we will extract the reflective learning. I got a bit carried away and wondered whether it was possible to achieve reflective learning before the experience has occurred. Nonsense said Simon. Not so sure say I. Many times I rehearse activities in my head before the event, and I learn something through that process; not sure what. Now I need Tom Bourner to sort this out for me. Sorry, Tom, no retirement for you, you started this....
Took sausages and veg for Simon's dinner tonight. Once again managed to get him to eat some greens and carrots. He gave us the news after dinner that he had a muscle 'tick' in his right leg and arm. This is an indication of potential recovery in the limbs. I hope and I pray and then pray some more. We talked about writing papers together, and reviewing some papers for journals. Simon was excited about that.
We are looking forward to a visit from one of Simon's students tomorrow evening, and then our wedding anniversary celebration on Thursday evening. An eventful week.
Love Marian x

14th September: too much information

2009-09-14T02:59:00.000-07:00

Simon declared this morning that he didn't feel so well, and I could not fathom what was giving him trouble. I came to the conclusion that it was just a "Monday" feeling. Margaret joined us for lunch at the hospital, indeed she kindly brough lunch, and for coffee afterwards in the secret garden. He perked up a lot, and even slightly embarassed me with his topic of conversation which was distinctly personal. Anyone else but Margaret would have said "too much information, Simon"! His speech was very good today, and he was explaining that he had been refusing certain medication, perhaps the sedative, and that this was helping him to be more communicative. I am joining the speech therapy session tomorrow and looking forward to that. A nice chat with our social worker this evening, just back from her hols in NSW where she enjoyed the snow. Being European I am over snow (especially the British type), but I can see why Australians love it. The social worker is going to try to arrange the full team meeting, our list of questions is growing daily. I write them down on scraps of paper as Simon thinks of them, must turf out my handbag and retrieve all of these tomorrow.
We had a nice card from Heather which made Simon smile, he likes the idea of being the regenerative doctor. Also very pleased that Henk will be visiting us in September. Then news that one of Simon's students will visit him on Wednesday with news of his imminent conference papers. Simon was very energised by that. It is great that the visitors are picking up, thanks for the effort guys, I know that many of you are experiencing your own trials at present. Have you noticed that everything gets blamed on the GFC. I heard that kids are turning up to school and using the GFC as a reason for not doing their homework! In my day, we blamed the power cuts; us kids loved the miners...
Love Marian xx

13th September: A visit from John

2009-09-13T01:57:00.000-07:00

Simon was delighted to see John turn up at our home today, armed with a couple of crownies and some wonderful CDs that he had burned. One of these is called "Educating Simon" an introduction to country music of the early twentieth century. Nice one John. They had a nice chat. Simon was keen to hear all the gossip from work, John was very diplomatic, don't worry guys! You can see them here in our front room, must work harder on composing these pictures, our dining room table is mayhem.
Apart from John's visit we got stuck into a very long film about superheroes, the Watchmen. I liked some of it, but the gory scenes were very nasty. Because it is such a long film we had to leave it about 40 minutes from the end for Simon's return to hospital. We will pick it up again next weekend. Skippy lurked around for a bit, and did briefly stand on Simon's lap, he is gently coming round to the idea of Dad and his machine.
Got up at the crack of dawn woken by riotous birdsong; the birds are all flirting with each other outrageously and they seem to compete for bandwidth first thing in the morning. Skippy is beside himself; "which one shall I chase first?". I got out into the garden by 8am (by which time Skips was exhausted and had to go back to bed) and got a lot done: lawns mowed, palm fronds cleared, potatoes earthed up, and some pesky lawn edging installed - much trickier than I had bargained for. It is all looking lush and green just now, and the spring flowers are bursting onto the scene, but I know that in a matter of weeks the heat will take its toll and we will be struggling to keep all but native plants alive. Gardening in Australia is very different - if you don't want it to grow it will grow like a thug! I still have to re-work my bricklaying job, along with a hundred other small projects around the place.
Simon enjoyed home-cooked stir fry this evening but had a bit of trouble manipulating the noodles, in fact he was fairly covered in noodles at one stage. "Call me noodle Si" he said.
Love Marian xx

September 12th: Smart new clothes

2009-09-12T02:20:00.000-07:00

Sorry I missed the blog yesterday, I went up to McLaren Vale and spent the evening with my nieces - rather a lot of Shiraz was consumed! I stayed overnight and slept like a log. I had a bit of a spending spree in The Blokes Shop (yes it is called that) in McLaren Vale, and found some beaut polo shirts, a warm fleece, and some nice trainers. I bought a size smaller than usual and they all fit well. You can see him here in his beloved garden (note the bougainvillea against the fence) wearing a smart R M Williams polo shirt. It was around 28 degrees today, but despite wearing shorts he wore the fleece all day.

Picked Simon up on my way back from the Vale (very scary drive from the Vale, raging cross-winds), we now have vouchers for the access taxis, and I paid just $14 for the round trip, just as well since I spent up big time in the Blokes Shop.... Simon signs his own taxi vouchers each time we travel. We had a nice afternoon at home, first a spot of lunch, then a walk along the road where we found a garage sale in progress (these may be unique to Australia, you put all your unwanted kit out in the garage, place a sign in the street, and a hundred scavengers appear from nowhere). We were amongst the scavengers today, it gave a purpose to our walk. Simon fancied a second-hand jacket, it was nice, but sadly it was too small for him. He also rummaged through the books. Then back home for a couple more episodes of Doctor Who culminating with 'doomsday', a spot of music and it was time to return to the hospital. I took lamb chops, baked potato, and some home cooked fresh veg in a flask. He ate the lot, it is the first time I have managed to get him to eat vegetables in a month, so mighty pleased with myself. The trick is to get them really fresh and dust them in lemon thyme and parsley with a little butter. Strawberries for afters then a spot of TV and off to bed for Simon.

We spoke with Barry O'Grady at lunchtime, it was great to hear from you Bazza. We are looking forward to your visit to SA late October. Also read a wonderful cheery email from David McGladdery, cheers for the music Dave, Simon really enjoyed the Blockheads.

Simon told me that he could feel the right side of his jaw today, and there is distinct movement in the right shoulder. I am not imagining that.

Simon has been engaging his nurses with his music and one of the male nurses this evening told him he was going to bring in a CD for him that he particularly liked - Spanish acoustic I think. He is doing very well getting in and out of bed on the slide-board, and I can see a time soon when I will be able to manage this with him alone.

All good, Love Marian xx

10th September: 26 degrees in Adelaide

2009-09-10T02:33:00.000-07:00

Today was a classic South Australian beauty, twenty six degrees, a light breeze and clear blue skies. I don't think Shirley believed me that we have great weather here, but now she has finally experienced some. I considered a dip in the pool but faltered!
Mel and Pen took the lunchtime shift with Simon today, they arrived armed to the teeth with goodies from the deli, and this evening I took some home-cooked grub. Simon has been quiet and not very interested in talking the last couple of days. I believe it is due to some drug that they are giving him, it must be too strong. I will talk to his doctor tomorrow about that, I would rather talk Simon through his problems than suppress his ability to talk altogether.
Managed to zip through some lecture preparation this morning and a student's research paper this afternoon. Also spoke with the council about the citizenship ceremony. They are going to try to fit me in to a private ceremony in October, I spoke to a very nice person who turned out to be the mayor! I was desperate to see Simon this evening having missed by lunchtime fix. People have been exhorting me to take a day off from visiting, but the truth is I miss him.
However, I'm going out tomorrow evening for the first time in several months. After our hospital visit I will drop Shirley home then drive up to McLaren Vale where I have an appointment with a tasty glass of Shiraz. I'll stay over with Mel and Pen at Hardy Avenue, then go pick Simon up for his home visit. I'd forgotten about having a social life. Must put that right.
Love Marian xx

9th September: New shoes

2009-09-09T03:27:00.000-07:00

Someone had been at the sherry in the kitchen again today, Simon's lunch turned up minus the main course! In fact everyone on the ward had something missing. I had to substitute with a pie again. Simon was not displeased. He had a busy morning with physio and speech therapy. The speech session was held with the psychologist who is quizzing Simon about his feelings and state of mind. I think it was an intense session and had the effect of leaving him a) speechless b) in a troubled state of mind. Not exactly the objectives of the session I would hazard. Shirley arrived under her own steam late afternoon and caught the wrath of Simon. He is capable of tearing you off a strip if you don't understand him. I don't worry about this, I think that anger is a good and natural thing in his situation, he isn't giving up. I was late arriving this evening, and stayed even later to see him into bed. Once again, Simon surprised me. He was able to get into the bed from his wheelchair using a slide-board. This is a piece of plastic not unlike a kitchen chopping board with a very shiny surface. You wedge this underneath your bottom with the other end resting on the bed, then just wiggle yourself off the chair onto the bed using your feet for balance. I watched him do this perfectly. Brilliant. This means that he is no longer dependent on the hoist which is a horrid thing, and if you can get free of the hoist you are a step closer to going home.
I bought Simon some new trainers today, and two sets of PJs. He was looking quite smart when we left him this evening.
Love Marian xx

8th September: Horse pills

2009-09-08T02:38:00.001-07:00

When I arrived at lunchtime today Simon was in bed sleeping like a baby, it transpires that he had been given an anti-depressant that was far too strong for him. He managed a bit of lunch, but was out for the count all afternoon. At tea-time we found him sitting up, but still obviously drowsy. The medical staff were keeping a close eye. Needless to say, he won't be taking those horse pills again.
Best news today, we have been given a book full of access taxi vouchers worth up to $30 a piece, there are 80 vouchers and we have to make them last for six months. This will cover our trips home to Brighton at weekends for around 5 months. We only have to pay 25% of the fare, so about $30 a week rather than the $120 that I have been paying. We could even go further afield, and I am considering a trip to McLaren Vale for our wedding anniversary next week.
I am deeply impressed by the SA government in funding this access transport scheme. It is neat when you see your tax going to good use. We are also grateful to our social worker for arranging this for us.
We will be at home on Saturday and Sunday afternoon if any colleagues would like to pass by. Look us up in the white pages. Simon has only seen family recently and is getting a bit fretful about that and other things (hence the horse pills).
Love Marian xx

7th September: Simon stands up

2009-09-07T05:07:00.000-07:00

For several days Simon has been telling me that he can stand up independently and has offered to show me this. I have been so afraid of him falling on my watch, and the consequences in terms of lack of trust from the staff when I bring him home. Today, my sister Margaret and brother-in-law Gerry took the lunchtime visiting session. They took him to the secret garden, and he tried his standing-up trick on them. They fell for it, and he did it! He stood up, all by himself. Oh, my Simon, I am so proud of you.
One of Simon's doctors has proposed an all-team meeting for next Tuesday with Simon and me. I am really looking forward to this, I do not think that the teams meet up about an individual patient so often, and it will be good for us to have input and some output from that session. I will go into that meeting straight from a master's tutorial so I should be switched on. Simon seems to think that there is a problem for me being an academic with high expectations of intellectual discourse, and then switching to my interaction with him at what seems to him to be a simple level. This could not be further from the truth. I have never been so intellectually challenged than I am now. Simon's condition is teaching me so much about so many things, and I feel energised.
I had my performance review today. All good, except that I was disappointed in myself in terms of publications. Wonder if this blog might get me a DEST point?
Love Marian x

6th September: Simon meets Harry

2009-09-06T02:30:00.000-07:00

Home again for Sunday afternoon. Our neighbour, Jan invited us round for a beer, and here you can see Simon on the patio playing ball with Harry the dog. Anyone who will throw the ball for Harry becomes an instant friend, so Simon got lots of love. Skippy, perhaps being a little jealous, came closer today and at one stage stood on Simon's lap. We gave Simon a father's day present and a card signed with a paw print. It was nice outdoors but Simon was keen to go in and watch his new DVDs, two episodes of Dr Who and the Cybermen kept him rapt.

While searching the shed for something else, I turned up Simon's headphones, he was over the moon, and when I left him this evening he was happily bopping away to beautiful stereo sound.

Love Marian x